Heartless Angel
by MikiFreaky
Summary: Hidden in a beautiful valley in the Nibel Mountains, Cloud and his friends find a diary or sorts. In it is scribed a story none of them ever expected to read. In the words they discover a tale of deep love, of a horrible burden, and of true strength. They discover the truth of what led the man they have fought so hard against to become the monster they hate.
1. Chapter 1

-Note: Okay, so this is a FFVII fic (obviously). This is a story I wrote for one of my friends, to explain some of my personal theories about the hows and whys of this game. So some things are a little different in here than they are in actual cannon story-line. Also, there's a character of my creation in here, an OC, so if you don't like that then I suggest you don't read. One more thing. FFVII is actually one of my least favorite games in the series (please don't hate me!) so the timing of events and characters may be a teensey bit off because I just don't know all the much about it compared to FFIX or FIV. I apologize for that, but I wrote it trying to stay as close to the original story as possible. Now, please read on and enjoy!-

Heartless Angel

0011, Mountains,

Nibel Area

High in the mountains, near a beautiful waterfall where the water fell clear and cool, a field of beautiful, radiant flowers bloomed. Cradled on all sides by craggy mountains and hard rock, the gently moving flowers were sparkles of magnificent color and life. In the middle of this flower field, long hidden from view by the rocks and mists shielding it, almost like someone was trying to protect it, was a dilapidated old house. The flowers were the fullest, most fragrant closest to the house, and in some cases had grown into and around the rotting wooden structure. The home was simple, made up of just three small rooms and a little porch with a swing that still gently creaked on it's chains. As a calming, almost loving breeze swirled around the valley, the soft sound of the swing and the sway of the flowers were the only sounds heard in the peaceful silence. Then, in the distance, a group of people appeared, walking out of the misty clouds and approaching the house. The group all stared at the almost glowing radiance of flowers around them, their faces reflecting awe at the beauty and pain at the same time. Softly, her words barely above a whisper, the slightest member of the group, a girl with short cropped black hair and bright brown eyes, spoke.

"These... flowers. They look like... her flowers, don't they?" She asked, turning to the tall man draped in red standing next to her, his face partially hidden by his long raven locks and the top of his crimson cape. "How'd you find this place, Vin?" The red-clothed man made a small sound in his throat, but refrained from speaking (despite the stamping feet of his female companion) until the others had gathered around him.

"This place has always been inaccessible, since it used to be ringed in on all sides by the peaks of the mountain. But recently, one of the peaks crumbled and opened up entry. When I saw what was here..." The man trailed off and fell silent. A man with shockingly blue eyes and pale, spiked blonde hair stepped up next to him. At his other side was a worried looking beautiful woman with a buxom body and beautiful features. She was the one to speak, after looking hard at the blonde man's face.

"Vincent... you called us all up here because you found this place?" She asked, looking a little confused. "But you said you had discovered information that we all needed to hear..." In answer, Vincent pointed to the house still a distance away from them. Without another word he walked away, leaving the others to follow him. The unusual group did, staring about them in wonder. Though all of them muttered about the flowers' resemblance to those they had seen before, none of them said that these were even bigger and more beautiful, at least not when they thought the blonde could hear them. Once everyone gathered around the house, Vincent motioned them to wait and briefly stepped inside, coming back out carrying a weatherproof bundle. Inside were stacks of paper covered in neat, somewhat masculine writing. Vincent handed one of the stacks to the blonde, set the rest down and leaned against the porch railing. After a second, the blonde untied the stack of paper and lifted the first one.

"This world has monsters enough without me adding to their number. I know my time will end soon, yet that even at its ending, the nightmare my time induced is only beginning. I still am not clear on how this happened. How did a man I knew as one of my best friends and a hero become the single greatest threat to this planet? I know that it must be stopped, and to stop it is to end him, but I do not wish to see my friend, my brother, maligned. I might be the only one left who knows the truth of who he really was, before sorrow and betrayal drove him to embrace madness. While I still have time, before I must go greet death, I want to write down the truth. I do not know who will read these words, or when, but I must write them down. Here I will scribe the last words of Angeal Hewley -" Here the blonde suddenly stopped reading, his voice catching and the paper sliding out of his grasp.

The woman next to him caught it. "Cloud..." She muttered before sighing and shoving her hair back. Holding the paper up so she could see it, she continued where the stunned Cloud had left off. "Here I will scribe the last words of Angeal Hewley about the truth of the man known as Sephiroth, how he was not a monster, not by choice, and how he was one of the best men to ever grace this earth. I do not know exactly how to begin his true story, the one no one but I and Genesis knew, except by how it was told to me. It began, his fall to madness as I see it now, when he was only fifteen and the youngest man to ever be made a SOLDIER 1st Class, in the Wutai War..."

Wutai Mountains, 1992

The flames leaping around me, roaring and howling, did nothing to mask the screams and cries of the innocent who were being slaughtered. Blood scented the air copper and made my stomach churn as I saw it almost pouring into the ground from the countless dead lying about. The men of this village were farmers, people of the land. Not soldiers. But the masked infantry of Shin Ra didn't care. We lived near the Wutai; we were peaceful with them and traded with them, in return for being allowed to live simple lives free of "progression," as it was called by Shin Ra. That made us sympathizers of the Wutai People and thus targets. I cringed and clung tighter to my mothers back as another man in front of us was slaughtered but flying bullets which ripped a person apart. One of the small number of men left standing turned and looked at us.

"Flee! You must run. Ifalna is already lost to us, has left to heed the call of destiny. This planet cannot lose another of you. You and your daughter must live, Asria!" He said, gesturing wildly to my mother to try to make her run. Calmly, the ragged woman with sooty grey-streaked mahogany hair turned and looked at me. Grabbing my hands, she pressed a kiss into each palm and briefly held my face between her worn, calloused palms. A single shining tear tracked down her face, leaving traces of white wrinkled skin behind.

"Ciara..." She whispered my name, leaning forward to kiss my forehead before she turned and started walking away from me with the pride and dignity of the kind long thought lost to this world. The man who had asked us to run stared at her.

"Asria, what are you doing? Take Ciara and flee here!" He yelled, desperation making his voice harsh. My mother reached out a hand and rested it on his shoulder as the sounds of the infantry drew closer. The man froze and stared at her, seeming to calm himself under her touch.

"Ciara will live, have no fear of that. But I am old, older in spirit than I can bear. My husband is long gone back to this planet and lives on as a memory in the flow of life. My oldest child Ifalna has already gone to I know not where, heeding the call of destiny this planet set for her ages beyond her inception. Ciara, the light of my life, is young, only fifteen, yet already has more the power than Ifalna nor I ever held. The Shin Ra warriors attack onward, ever thirsting for blood. They shall be satiated on mine as I rejoin my beloved in the planet. Thus will Ciara live."

My mother's calm words made terror streak through me and I went to take a step towards her, but her blue eyes cut into me and caused my movements to cease. "Ciara. Live. That is the first step towards embracing your destiny. You know the will of our mother planet best of all. Listen to her now and go. Find your destiny. I have already lived mine." More tears began to fall as my mother smiled softly at me one last time.

"Never forget to love. If you find love and protect it with all your heart, then the beauty of this world can be saved." Taking her hand off the man's shoulder, my mother turned and walked towards the invading forces. Choking on smoke from the burning village and my own tears, I turned my back on my village and my mother and ran, blindly smacking aside branches and leaping over rocks until I came to the sheer rock face separating our small populace from the traditional lands of the Wutai. I knew I could get asylum there, and time to think what I would do. Behind me, I heard a sudden explosion of shots and felt the warmth that always whispered in my heart give one last pulse and slowly fade. Gasping, I fell to my knees and felt tears pour from my eyes. She was dead. Mother's spirit was fading, rejoining my father and the planet in the LIfestream. Shaking, I curled over until my forehead touched the cold, frost hardened ground and wept. I could hear the planet's pain as more blood was poured into her, and through her agony I could sense the approach of the infantry which had shot down my mother in cold blood. Gritting my teeth, I stood and looked ahead.

Wiping off my face, I ran again, my long, deep honey colored hair flaring out about me as I picked up my pace. With one last gasp and leap, I stumbled out of the forest to the small clearing my people had cut just before the mountain side rose, to give us room to maneuver as we climbed the sheer rocks. My foot caught on something and I fell. Quickly gaining my feet again, I looked for what had tripped me and slapped a hand to my mouth to stop a horrified scream from slipping out. A decapitated body lay beside me in a pool of blood. Not far away, another corpse rested, cut in twain. Further on, a man's body lay missing both arms and one leg, the missing limbs beside him. Still more bodies lay around in other various states of mutilation. My horrified gaze tracked over them all. In the center of this chaos stood a lone figure holding a seven foot long blade which was dripping ruby in the flickering light offered from the blazing village behind me. Long, silken silver hair shifted in the wind as the person turned and faced me.

For a moment I thought I read sorrow on that handsome, beguiling face, but then the full force of his gaze landed on me and rendered me immobile. Almost feline green eyes regarded me emotionlessly as his beautiful, inhumanly perfect face was cast in red. My instincts screamed at me to move, to run, that something was wrong with this man, but I couldn't. Moving silently, the young man walked up to me as I stared at him, my absolute terror making me, strangely, not afraid at all. I saw death in his eyes. I knew I could not win if I fought. Instead, I raised my chin and met his gaze, though doing so caused my heart to pound and my soul to shiver. He was... just wrong. Unnatural.

"Are you not going to scream and beg for your life like the rest of these fools?" He asked me suddenly in a deep, gravelly voice. I shuddered, but refused to look away.

"Would you let me live even if I did?" I countered, daring him with my eyes. I expected the blade still clasped in his hands to flash and end me any second, but instead, the young man... boy, really, close in age to me, tilted his head and studied me closer. I felt... pain from him then. This is so confusing! My mind is telling me he is dangerous, but my soul wants to comfort him. Who is this man? His black gloved hand reached out and grabbed my chin, tilting my head towards the burning forest to see me. The sight of the flames kicked all uncertainty and wandering thoughts away. I glared at him with all the hatred and anger I felt even as tears continued to seep out of my eyes. Suddenly a loud gunshot reverberated through the trees and the man's glowing green eyes widened as a red stain started to bloom on his side. I inadvertently let out a small scream.

"Sir! More runaway survivor's over here!" I heard a young male voice say. The silver haired man cursed under his breath and grabbed me with the hand that still clutched his sword, pressing the other to his wound. Then, in a surprising feat, he agilely leapt up the mountain face with me held tightly against his body. Just as he gained the top of the cliff face, the infantry soldiers spilled into the small clearing, easily seeing us silhouetted against the night sky.

"Up there!" One of the men shouted, raising his rifle and firing at us. Again, the silver haired man amazed me with his speed and agility even while holding another, quickly dodging the bullets and sliding down the other side of the cliff into the relative safety of the Wutai side.

"Those idiots... Shot by my own side. They will never let me hear the end of this." The man muttered as he finally let me loose and sank down to the ground beside me, a small grimace of pain covering his face. I felt my heart move towards sympathy at his injury, but ... the image of all those dead villagers at his feet burned in my head. I took one small step back and suddenly felt the cold kiss of metal on my throat. Gulping, I turned and saw him holding the sword against my skin without even bothering to look my way.

"Do not attempt to escape, woman. Our orders are to kill or detain all Wutai sympathizers. I have yet to decide what to do with you." He said, ending on a little gasp of pain as his gunshot wound obviously hurt him. Even injured I was not certain I could escape from him. "I may just kill you since I haven't the time to sit around idly and wait for my men to find us. Shot on my first solo SOLDIER 1st class mission...shameful, really." The last part was mumbled to himself, but I heard and suddenly lost the strength to stand. Those cold, cruel green eyes remained unchanged as I stared at him in growing horror.

Even away from the cares of the material world, we heard news of the only SOLDIER 1st class at Shin Ra, the monster made in a perversion of the natural process our mother planet held sacred. Said to be a demon in the guise of a man, he was supposedly stronger than all the infantrymen combined and as calculating and cruel as a machine. Though very young, he was already strong enough to be allowed to guard the president personally and was privy to secret information. He was a hero among the people of the world for his fierceness in battle against the Wutai earlier this year. A legend and a terror, the youngest and most powerful warrior that Shin Ra possessed was...

"Sephiroth." I whispered the name as he looked at me. "You're... you're him. Sephiroth." The silver haired man, Sephiroth, just continued to watch me closely, then suddenly made a small pained noise and fell over onto his side, breathing heavily. The deadly blade fell away from my skin and those disturbing eyes left mine, granting me the power to move once more. My mind was screaming at me to run while I had the chance, but... He hadn't killed me. Sephiroth was not known for mercy or kindness. But even though he had slaughtered all of my villagers who had reached the wall, why had he not killed me? And why, when we were being fired upon, had he taken me with him up the safety of the cliff instead of leaving me behind for the Infantry to deal with? I took one small step back from where he lay and stopped. It wasn't right. Though he was an enemy, though he had killed, I could not leave an injured man to die. Though... he was SOLDIER, and a simple gunshot shouldn't kill him, right? Could I live with myself if I left and he did die, though? That small possibility sent pain lancing through me.

Growling at my own soft heart, I went to his side and bent down beside him. To my shock, his eyes were still open and he was alert, though dangerously pale. "You have not yet run? You are a strange woman indeed." He muttered and I half pulled half guided him onto his knees. That he was able to move still with this terrible an injury was proving my theory that he would survive the initial wound, though he may bleed out if not treated soon. Under normal circumstances I would leave him where his people could find him, but... those Shin Ra infantry were shooting first and asking later. They might kill the man. I heard the sounds of soldier's approaching and felt my heart skip a few beats, but I determinedly made Sephiroth stand and walked him slowly to a hidden cave I knew was nearby. Laying him down in there, I sat close to his side and pressed my finger to my lips. He nodded and closed his eyes as we heard the infantry rushing by so close to us that I was afraid at any second they would find us. Finally, the sounds of marching faded and only silence could be heard. I let out a long breath and turned back to Sephiroth.

"Do you have any healing Materia?" I asked. The SOLDIER quirked an eyebrow at me, but nodded and motioned to his sword. I picked it up, surprised by how heavy the weapon was, given the thinness of the blade, and saw the pale blue materia I was looking for embedded in the weapons hilt. Prying it loose, I held it between my cupped hands and closed my eyes. My mother, Ifalna and I were not like everyone else. My sister had knowledge in her mind about things that happened two thousand years ago, things that the planet whispered to her. She was wise beyond her years and able to feel the pull of destiny through the flow of the Lifestream. My mother had been able to call the flow of the Lifestream, make it flow closer to the surface or deeper down to enrich the soil and heal the scars left on the planet. And I could hear the breath of the planet and control her blood in all forms. Be it Lifestream, Mako, Materia or water, I could control it. Materia always worked beyond capacity expectations when I used them. But we had to be careful not to be found out. My father had been murdered for his abilities, killed by Shin Ra scientists who experimented on him. We always moved around a lot to avoid rumors or detection. And how here I was, planning on using my ability on one of the most dangerous men associated with Shin Ra.

But my heart was telling me it was the right thing to do. The pain I saw in his eyes was real, and despite what his actions said... I had seen the sorrow flickering in his eyes as he walked up to me amidst the bodies of the fallen. I felt the materia I held grow warm and opened my eyes to see the beautiful life of the planet manifest and surround it. This skill was a new one that had developed recently, and my mother had been training me to use it, but thus far I wasn't very gifted, so I may end up causing more harm than good. Still... I looked into Sephiroth's scary eyes and saw no fear. I would try. Lifting one hand, I directed the glow towards the bleeding wound in his side and saw him flinch a little when the power touched him, as the bullet was slowly pushed backwards out of his wound and the muscle tissues began to knit back together. Only once his skin was perfectly smooth and flawless once more did I silently call the Lifestream back down and let the power fade from his materia, sticking the orb back into his weapon. Sephiroth stared at me for a long, pregnant moment, then sighed and flopped back against the cave wall with a sigh.

"I now owe you a debt of honor. While I would be easier for me to kill you and complete my mission," he said, picking up his sword and touching the blade lovingly, "I cannot, in good conscious, murder my savior." After a second, he turned those powerful eyes on me again. "Woman, what is your name?" He asked abruptly, standing and looking down on me on my knees before him. Despite the control that position gave him over me, I did not feel threatened or dominated at all. This man, I can feel his brutality against my skin, but along with that violence is a brash honesty. He would never dominate another intentionally or use tricks and manipulations on a person. His soul is bright, and pure. For now. I can sense a darkness within him that frightens me.

Is it because he is SOLDIER or something worse? He held out a gloved hand to me, and after a moment's consideration, I accepted it, letting my worries and running thoughts slid away. He easily pulled me up, and standing close to him as I was I was even more convinced that he wasn't any older than me. His body was muscled and strong but still held the trace of youth in it, like he still had some growing to do. Not to mention that he was only a little taller than I was. I looked up into his too beautiful face and sighed. Fifteen and already a mass murderer. It wasn't right, but this fate had been given to him same as mine had been given to me in the depths of the planet when I was six. We neither one can escape that now. I straightened up and met his powerful gaze.

"I am called Ciara." I told him.

He nodded and walked to the mouth of the cave, whipping a sleek black cell phone out of nowhere and after punching in a number, holding it to his ear. After a brief pause, he started speaking. "Veld, I have done my mission. With the exception of one survive of whom I am taking command of, the entire village has been destroyed. We found no evidence of Wutai sympathies, so the Turks will need to cover it up." He said, reporting the destruction of my home and the false accusations against it calmly. I heard an angry sounding voice on the other end of the phone but couldn't make out the words. Sephiroth sighed. "No. Veld, she shows unique abilities that I would like to observe before handing her over to be dissected by Hojo. That man isn't a scientist but a sadist with a twisted thirst for powerful knowledge. That department has fallen in quality since Professor Gast left about ten years ago. I wish they would put Professor Hollander in charge, since his work is of more interest and less impact. If something comes from these observations then I will bring in Hollander, but nothing else until then." Sephiroth appeared to be arguing with this Veld person and it wasn't hard to figure out the context of the conversation. They were deciding what to do with me. Though I didn't know what it entailed, I thought being under Sephiroth's observations much better than being a living experiment for the Shin Ra scientists. I may live longer with the killer than the scientist. How twisted is that?

Finally Sephiroth shook his head. "When it comes right down to it, Veld, I do outrank you. I am keeping the woman under my observation. The mission has been completed according to the president's orders and I don't see any further issues." Hanging up on the other man, Sephiroth pocketed the phone and faced me again.

"Am I to be your slave now?" I asked, sarcasm turning my fearful tone into a mocking one. When faced with situations I wasn't exactly prepared to deal with, I found myself being extremely sarcastic and haughty. Sephiroth raised an eyebrow at my words, but didn't comment other than to shake his head. I sighed and put my hands on my hips.

"What then? Because if you intend to hand me over to the Shin Ra scientists I will fight you." I said, clenching my hands together. Again he shook his head, turning to face the first blush of dawn that was streaking across the sky.

"You will be free to live your life however you wish. All I require from you is that you send me letters every month about what you are doing and whatever you have done so that I may submit them to the president as my observation reports. Since anything too obviously powerful would land you in Hojo's hands, like what you did to the materia, but anything took mundane will make the Turks kill you to fully finish the mission, you must exercise some caution but remain engaging. I will help you as I can, but it will be best for us to not meet in person. I am, after all, the pride of Shin Ra." Sephiroth said that with a hint of derision in his voice.

"This is my repayment of the debt I owe you for saving my life, Ciara. Though it might have been better for all if I had lost it." Finally he faced me again, and for a moment, over this youthful, lost and powerful face, I saw an older, dangerous face superimposed. The red light of dawn seemed to cast flames into his shadow, but I blinked and the vision was gone. Still... I knew when the planet was speaking to me without words. Sephiroth was dangerous, so terrible dark, and yet... my fate and this terrifying man's were interlocked now. Well, never has fate been kind to me, so I shouldn't be surprised that I was being charged with this tormented man's future as well. I flipped back my hair and sent Sephiroth a small, painful smile.

"Well then, Sephiroth... thank you for giving me my life to live." At my words, his eyes widened, but after a moment he returned my smile with a softer look. I wouldn't call it a smile (his lips didn't curve at all) but I knew that was him expressing happiness.

"And you for mine." He replied, letting me stand beside him as the sun rose over the mountains and cast beauty over the terror of the night.


	2. Chapter 2

0011, Mountains, Nibel Area

"After that, both Sephiroth and the girl he spared, Ciara, went their separate ways. She kept her promise and wrote him letters all the time, more than he knew what to do with, which he then used to create an observation report. Through those he kept his promise to not hand her over to the scientists and repaid his debt. For almost six years they did not meet up. They lived apart, but they knew more about each other than I think anyone else. Sephiroth grew in fame for his prowess in battle until he rarely went out on simple missions like the ones that led him to Ciara any more. He was always doing highly dangerous Wutai suppression, or investigations for the President. First I then Genesis became SOLDIER 1st class as well. For a while we knew nothing about Ciara, but eventually, when he, the antisocial one, kept getting more mail than Genesis the solitary playboy, we asked. He was fairly willing to tell us about her then, though we were sworn to secrecy. We felt that he didn't want to carry the burden of protecting this girls life alone. We, naturally, made fun of him, as much as anyone could make fun of Sephiroth. Looking back on it now, those were the times that he was the most... human." Tifa finished reading the last page of the first half of the stack of papers and looked at the others.

Vincent was still leaning against the railing, though Yuffie had migrated to sit in front of him while she listened to the story being read to her. As she shifted about restlessly, unable to sit still, Vincent would move as well, to keep her from hurting herself or to block the wind, though very few in the group noticed his actions, especially not the young ninja he did them for. Cloud was beside Tifa, silent and still. Cid and Barrett were musing aloud what type of woman this Ciara had been while Nanaki and Reeve just waited for more information. At last, Cloud spoke.

"This account seems... surreal to me. The Sephiroth I have known was not like the one described by Angeal. Though, I remember Zack saying that occasionally he was allowed to see a side of Sephiroth that was almost human. But Zack never mentioned a woman named Ciara." The blonde finally said. Tifa sighed and rubbed her eyes.

"Well, no. But still... this is Angeal, Cloud, Zack's instructor. He wouldn't lie. Besides..." She hesitated,but then swallowed hard and kept talking. "Ifalna was Her mother's name." At the whispered words everyone fell silent as they all thought about what this meant. They knew the truth, that she had been the last Cetra on the planet, the only one capable of summoning the powerful magic holy to counteract the destruction Meteor that Sephiroth rained down on them four years ago. But if what the letters were saying was true then Ifalna had had a younger sister... who had been a full blooded Cetra of immense power. If this were true, why hadn't this woman helped them to stop Sephiroth when he tried to destroy the planet she was connected to? Why had she allowed so many to be killed? Why had she allowed her to die?

"Keep reading. The answer to this mystery must lie in Angeal's words." Vincent said softly. Tifa handed the papers to Cid, who had walked over to where she was. As the older man shuffled around and put out his cigarette, Tifa sat close to Cloud and linked her hand with his. Though the blonde didn't smile or nod appreciation for the gesture, he did squeeze her hand tighter and bring it to his chest briefly. Tifa smiled and then looked at Cid. The man cleared his throat and started in, snubbing out his cigarette before picking up a paper and scanning the first couple of lines. "Alright, ya peasants, pay attention. Says here... 'Though they were 'part for years, It's my belief that destiny was workin' on 'em and was what caused Ciara to come to Midgar years after their last meeting, looking fer Sephiroth..."

Midgar, 1998

Midgar was supposedly the most advanced and wondrous city in all of Gaia. Here in this city were the headquarters for the Shin Ra Electric Power Company and all the businesses associated with it. All advances in science and technology came from here. The brochures painted it as a lovely, bustling city of intelligence and beauty. I sighed and hopped over a puddle of refuse. People wandered listlessly around me, some scuttling cautiously from shadow to shadow while others walked as quickly as they could. I stood in the middle of the street, staring up at the huge metal plate above me. My heart sank. Midgar was not a place of hope. How could you have hope when you cannot see the sky? Someone bumped into me and sent me careening off to one side.

"Hey, watch it, crazy lady!" The man yelled as he walked by, cursing a few more times under his breath. I straightened myself and shook my head. People walking by gave me strange looks. Most of the residents of this slums area underneath the plate that separated the lower class from the privileged wore dark colors like black, hunter green, and gray. My sky blue skirt and white ruffled blouse did look rather out of place. Even so... I was wearing combat boots like everyone else. I grinned impishly as I jumped over another stinking puddle of stagnant water.

Midgar was built around a series of Mako reactors and as such, at the center of the town was a huge building that housed the electronic equipment that converted the Mako into energy to power the city. This building also served as the Shin Ra headquarters the higher up the building you went. No one really knew how deep into the planet the building went. I walked towards the central structure slowly, able to feel screams of torment and silent agony coming up from the depths of the planet, connected to the roots of the building in front of me. Something hideous was going on in the deep, underground parts of the Shin Ra company building. But what remained a mystery, though I felt with uncanny certainty that those dark mysteries would eventually be unleashed upon the unsuspecting people. I shook my head. Focus, Ciara. You have a mission to complete. I pulled a small data chip from my belt pocket and walked up to the Infantryman guarding the elevator to the upper level as well as the mail service device. He held up his hand a I approached.

"Halt. Authorized persons only allowed on the elevator." He said, sounding extremely frustrated and tired. Well, I guess if my job was to stand in a slum and keep desperate, hungry souls from going to where they could find relief, I'd be a little angry too. I smiled at him and shook my head.

"I know. I only wish to use the mail device. How many gil?" I asked, holding up my data chip. Or, actually, it wasn't mine. Well, it was mine in that it was coded for my information and responded only to my code, but I hadn't been the one to buy it. Or to program it. Or put any of the gil accounts on it. But hey, why look a gift chocobo in the beak, as they say. The man relaxed a little and held up five fingers. My eyes about bugged out of my head. Five gil? For a mail message? When I sent in paper mail from all over Gaia the most it cost was two gil, one for posting to Midgar and the other to pay the postmaster at wherever I happened to be. This was insane. Of course... I glanced around and sighed. The sad, starving, dirty people down here probably didn't know that. The way to keep oppressed people from revolting was to keep them in ignorance and depression. Five gil for mail would do that when a loaf of bread costs seven gil here. I'd seen the grocery stall earlier when I first arrived and... the prices were exuberant. Not to mention that the produce was maggoty. Sighing and shaking my head again, I walked up to the mail device and inserted my card into it.

As my information popped up on the display I reminded myself that I could not save everyone I met who was in misfortune. I had already bought the grocer out of his maggoty bread and given it to the children I'd seen begging for food earlier. And I'd gone ahead and given some away all the loose gil I had in my pocket to the elderly beggars. To do much more was impossible without causing trouble. A beep from the mail device brought me out of my thoughts. The prompt was telling me to input the recipient's mail information. Smiling a little, I punched in the code that I had memorized almost six years ago and hit enter. Usually I just wrote the code down and had the Postmaster send the letters off. A code was just a code and only the computer would know who the recipient was, or at least where they were living. But this time there was no human intermediary and the computer whirred as it went through the hundreds of thousands of codes to find the match for the one I had imputed. Once it did, the device dinged and a box opened for me to compose my message. At the top it said from Ciara, to Sephiroth in little letters. I shifted a little to hide the screen with my shoulder, knowing that people like to snoop to find out what a person was writing and to whom. Especially Shin Ra. I glanced at the infantryman, but he appeared to be asleep at his post. Nodding, I started writing.

'_Savior 'O mine! I received your last letter and the prize that went with it. Though I don't know what you were doing in the Icicle Area, I love the gift. A Materia with no Lifestream or powers in it is indeed useless to you, but I think it's pretty! I'm using it as a hair ornament right now. Anyway, I was in the Woodlands Area when you sent the letter, so it has taken me awhile to receive it and get back. Sorry about that. I don't know if you want to report this or not but my abilities, as you call them, have manifested a new skill again. I'm an epic gardener now. I can grow the best produce and the prettiest flowers. When I was living in Gongaga that is how I made my living. There was a rather funny boy there. He idolized you and your friends in SOLDIER. He left a few months before I did, before the year changed, to go to Midgar to become one. We were never close, since I wasn't really welcome in the city all that much, but I'd recognize him if I saw him. You should totally watch out for the kid; I think you'd like him. Anyway, back on topic. I got your last letter. Why did you tell me that you had killed an entire Wutai unit while there? I don't like that senseless violence you do for President Shinra. And what about you? I know that you are not the kind of man who enjoys that violence! Sorry. I don't mean to lecture you. You're an adult and are free to pick your own path. That is the gift of life that we are given by this planet: Freedom. Or at least that is our belief... anyway. I wanted to return your letter so you wouldn't get in trouble or worry about me. And also... I wanted to let you know that I am in Midgar. I've never come to this city before in all my years of traveling but I wanted to at least see what it was like. Can't say I'm too impressed. The slums are awful and even though I have the money they won't let me travel above the plates because I'm not authorized. What does that even mean? I'm going to be here for awhile so, why don't we - Nevermind. It's not important. Stay safe. Ciara_.'

I read the letter one more time and nodded, hitting send and stepping back as the digital letter was sent out. It was the first one I had ever sent. I always wrote on paper and sent the letters that way before. For the first few years, Sephiroth had returned my letters that way (And I had those letters stored in my safe place far from the reach of any person short of one who could fly), but shortly after his fame grew larger following his success at destroying my village, he started sending digital copies. I guess he lacked the time to hand write me letters anymore. Plus, paper trails are easy to follow and Sephiroth has always taken my safety seriously. My data chip popped out of the mail device and I tucked it safely back in my belt pocket. The Shin Ra Infantryman nodded to me as I stepped back and wandered deeper into the slums. I kept looking up, hoping to catch sight of the sky, but the endless twisting metal of the plate obscured my view. The planet's voice was weak here. All I heard were her cries as the Lifestream was directed and controlled by painful machines. It was distracting to me, that was for certain. I kept walking blindly, not really paying attention to where I was going or my surroundings until I blinked when I noticed that all the people had vanished and I was alone in the middle of a narrow, very dark street.

"Uh oh." I muttered when I heard a soft scuffling sound behind me. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and I whirled in time to see a big, ugly man lunge at me. He grabbed my wrists and forced them over my head, pinning them with one hand while with his other he held a knife against my throat. I glowered at him as he licked his puffy lips and panted while staring at me.

"Now now, pretty... be nice to me 'ere and I wont hurt 'cha." He muttered, pressing the knife harder against my skin. He leaned in and licked my chin, making me shuddered as my gorge rose. Since I've been on my own for almost six years, this is sadly not the first time this has happened, so I readied myself to fight for my virtue again. I cocked my knees and got ready to knock the man's pride into his sternum when I saw a glint of silver in the dim light behind my assailant. I blinked, confused, and then squeaked when a long, much more deadly silver blade tapped the man licking me on the shoulder. The idiot growled and twisted around, shouting, "Bugger off, ye can 'ave her once I'm finished!" Then his eyes landed on the blade appearing from darkness and he paled. I stared at it too, uncertain. No freakin' way... it couldn't be him.

"Your offer is kind, but I would prefer you release her now." A dark, deep and almost emotionless voice ordered. My savior stepped out of the shadows, cat-like green eyes colder than the frozen north and perfectly beautiful face a mask of death. He tilted his head to the left, long, flowing silver hair sliding to one side as he pressed that infamous blade harder against my assailants shoulder. He absently brushed long bangs out of his face with his free hand, though the fell into his eyes again as soon as he dropped his hand. His nonchalance was terrifying for the lie it presented. I knew that with a flick of his wrist, the idiot who attacked me would be chopped in two. The assailant knew it too. He let me go so abruptly that I fell to my butt and, screaming like a child, tried to run. The silver demon moved faster than my eye could follow and rammed the hilt of his weapon into the man's temple, causing him to crash into the ground, silent. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw his chest rise and fall. He was alive.

Then those powerful eyes were boring into mine and I swallowed hard. He was the same and yet different. His chest was packed with more lean muscles and he had grown much taller. His hair was longer, his face more beautiful and yet merciless. And his eyes... I stared hard into the green depths and saw them flicker, then thaw a little as his face softened and he shook his head slowly. There. That was the boy I had known, hiding beneath the cruel veneer of this strange warrior. A fear I hadn't known I was carrying inside vanished at seeing that he wasn't totally lost to the darkness threatening him yet.

"Ciara..." He muttered, my name in his deep, almost graven tones causing a shiver to run down my spine. I ignored the shiver and jumped to my feet, brushing dirt off my skirt and blouse before I put my hands on my hips and mock-glared at him.

"You jerk!" I shouted, making his eyes widen the tiniest fraction. "Last time we met, you were, like, one inch taller than me! Now you're...you're... how tall are you!?" I demanded. He seemed at a loss for words for a moment, then twisted his lips into a miniscule half smile and shook his head, turning to the man lying on the ground and easily picking him up with one hand while his weapon vanished in a shower of tainted Lifestream, not that I would tell him that. I wasn't supposed to know about or be able to sense such things, afterall. I trust him, but spies are everywhere and I didn't want to end up as Shin Ra's lab rat. Some weapons, especially those utilized by those associated with Shin Ra, are often made of or utilize corrupted lifestream, though. I, whenever I find someone using one, worm my way close enough to purify the weapon for the owner. Usually this actually increases the weapons power output, though they are never aware of the reason why they could suddenly use the full power of their weapon without feeling ill. I'll just do the same for Sephiroth's weapon when I get the chance. He turned and started to walk off, so I huffed out a breath and chased after him. "Hey, tell me!" I demanded.

"Six one." He answered shortly as he traversed the twisting back alleys of the slums easily. "Ciara, what are you doing here?" He asked as we stepped out into the main track of the city once again. Instantly, people around us froze and stared at the man next to me with abject terror or cautious delight. I noted that all movement stopped and that people who were in the way of where he was walking quickly removed themselves. I was gawking at the effect his appearance had on the people, but I felt when he looked at me again, so I turned and met his gaze evenly. The spirit and fire in his eyes took my breath away, and the flashes of pain and uncertainty I saw in him softened my heart. I hid the knowledge I gleaned from his eyes and just smiled softly at him.

"How'd you know I was here? I just sent that letter, like, five minutes ago." I countered his question with another one. I really didn't know the answer to his question. A few months ago, I had sudden had a dream of him being engulfed by flames. It had been terrifying and heartbreaking all at the same time, and I had suddenly known that I needed to see him once more...not again, but once more, which made it impossible to resist. The urge had been so strong that I knew it was from the planet. She was telling me where my destiny was to be found. For whatever reason, the mother goddess of our planet had seen fit to direct me to this haunted warrior. Maybe it was the possible darkness threatening to swallow him that frightened her. If so, I would do my part in vanquishing it before my true destiny called me away forever. Sephiroth started speaking, so I waved the painful thoughts away with the ease of long practice and listened to his mesmerizing voice.

"My mail is sent to my phone as well as my personal system. I was on my way out of HQ when I got your letter." He answered me as we approached the same infantryman who I had spoken to earlier. Sephiroth tossed the unconscious man to the soldier, the other man almost falling as he caught the dead weight of the pervert. "He was attacking and molesting this woman so deal with him appropriately." Sephiroth ordered, ignoring the gaping mouth and stuttering reply the young infantryman gave him. Free of his cargo, Sephiroth grabbed my wrist and turned to go when the elevator dinged and the silver doors slid open. I twisted around to see who was coming out of a Shin Ra personnel elevator as Sephiroth let out a sigh and covered his eyes with his hand. A pair of extremely handsome men came out of the elevator. One was dressed in a red trench coat and black leather, and had shorter, shoulder length flame hair. His unnaturally blue eyes were open and flirty, though he also presented an aloof air which kept others at a defined distance. Next to him was a man dressed all in black with shoved back, mid length black hair. His face appeared a little more worn than his redheaded companion, and was a lot more composed and kindly. Both men started when they saw Sephiroth, and the red head's jaw fell open when he saw me being held by the first class SOLDIER.

The black haired man crossed his arms and smiled. "Well now... I see why you ran off after getting that message, Sephiroth." He said, shaking his head and looking at me. "You wouldn't happen to be Ciara, would you?" He asked. I was a little confused. These men used a Shin Ra elevator and knew Sephiroth, and knew about me, but didn't look like they wanted to study me. Both men were armed, the red head with a crimson sword across his back and the other man had a large weapon strapped across his back. They didn't wear standard Shin Ra Infantry gear either. What was going on? I opened my mouth to answer but didn't get the chance to as the redhead was suddenly standing in front of me.

I squeaked when he suddenly pulled me free of Sephiroth's grip and brought my fingers to his lips. "You are beloved by the Goddess." He muttered as he kissed my fingers. I stared at the back of his head for a moment, then sighed and drew my hand away.

"Loveless, Act two." I told him, watching as a smile started across his face. Behind me, Sephiroth groaned. "But, you know that line is followed by, 'Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul, Pride is lost, Wings stripped away, the end is nigh.' It isn't exactly flattering to be called the goddess in that context." I said, making the raven haired man start laughing so hard he almost fell over. Sephiroth smoothly stepped between me and the flirty guy, using his forward motion to propel me behind the shelter of his larger body.

"Hey, Sephiroth!" I shrieked, annoyed. "I can handle him. No need to be all protective." It never sat well with me when men assumed that I needed their help and protection. After the destruction of my village and my rescue at Sephiroth's bloody hands, I had sworn to never depend on a man again. For six years I have upheld that belief and I wasn't about to start changing it now. Setting my face into the familiar stubborn lines, I grabbed two fist fulls of Sephiroth's silken silver hair (luxuriating in the feel of the soft strands between my fingers; did he use a special product on his hair or what?) and tugged with all my might and made the man bend back a little to stop from having his hair yanked out of his head.

A silence fraught with tension and fear that you could have chopped with a knife fell over the entire slum area. I felt the soft strands slide free of my grip as Sephiroth turned to face me. Behind him, the black haired man grinned while the redheaded one still wore a look of shock on his face from my earlier words. The infantry man by the elevator looked at me with horror, his face white as a sheet. Civilians either fell to their knees where they stood or turned and ran. And I just stared into those beguiling green eyes, hands on hips and eyes daring the man to say anything. After a heavy couple of seconds, he reached out and grabbed a handful of my own burnished gold hair, which I kept restrained in a high tail atop my head. Even through the leather of his glove, his touch electrified me. I felt my eyes widen and stared at him in question this time. He let the strands fall through his fingers and dropped his hand, barely grazing my cheek with his touch as he did so.

"You have grown beautiful, Ciara, but your attitude seems to have remain the same as it was six years ago." He finally said, turning with a swish of his hair and facing the others while I remained stunned into a momentary silence as I tried to figure out if I had been complimented or insulted. "Genesis, Angeal, as you can see I have something which requires my urgent attention so I will not be able to join you for a training session today. My apologies." He said, still in a soft, almost toneless voice. Almost being the key words. I could hear the suppressed humor in his voice, as well as the sarcasm and underlying tension. And apparently so could the other two men... no, other two SOLDIERS. I knew them since he had said their names. I had read much about them in Sephiroth's letters and knew they were his closest friends. Their names were always mentioned with Sephiroth's, and their skill in battle nearly as legendary as his. They looked at me curiously.

"She's very beautiful, and she's smart too, Sephiroth. Such a good woman is wasted on you." The man called Genesis, the SOLDIER with a fan club, finally said, turning to Angeal beside him. "And I think our training can wait in lieu of this much more interesting matter which has come up." At those words, Angeal smiled and crossed his arms.

"Certainly. I'd rather be here with you and the woman than training the new boys. With the exception of one from Gongaga the rest look to be hopeless." Angeal said. I finally unfroze from the shock of having Sephiroth call me beautiful and then insult me in the same breath, and growled, waving my hands about in frustration.

"Something? Interesting Matter? Woman? What do you guys think I am, property?" I demanded, stamping my foot. Before they could answer, I turned to Sephiroth and pointed at him. To his credited it he just lifted an eyebrow at me, though his arrogance was seriously gonna get him killed one of these days even as I found it unbearably attractive. Focus, Ciara...

"You are in trouble. See if I enhance your materia for you any more." I growled, stalking past him and grabbing Genesis by one arm and Angeal by the other. "You two, in payment for insulting me, be my escorts and show me around Midgar. Or, the parts of Midgar I will be allowed to see." I started walking off, giving the two SOLDIERs I held no choice but to walk with me since I had a hold of them. Sephiroth muttered something under his breath and then soon followed along behind.

The people in the slum stared at me with frightened eyes. I just smiled, satisfied. I had made the three strongest men in Midgar my personal lackeys for the day. Not bad for a runaway orphan with strange powers. After a few moments of awkwardness, Genesis thawed out and started to enjoy walking around the slum areas with me. He would point out areas of interest and Angeal would tell me about them while Sephiroth remained my silent bodyguard. And I had no doubt that was what he was doing; the man would sometimes disappear for a moment only to come back vanishing his sword a second later. Though my connection to the planet was weaker here than anywhere else in Gaia, I could still feel the pulse of human life. He never killed anyone, which made me happy. But the fact that he felt hat he had to protect me even while his friends were here was unusual. While we were in the Sector Seven slums, I suddenly felt the pulse of the lifestream very close to the surface, flowing freely and not being directed and drained by Shin Ra.

Excited, I unhooked my arms from Genesis and Angeal and ran, ignoring their shouts as I was completely focused on finding the sanctuary in all this despair. Soon enough a ruined church came into view, the only part of this entire slum where the plate wasn't completed, allowing the ruined building to be bathed in sunlight. As I stepped into the sun, I looked up at the sky and smiled, feeling all my stress melting away. I went to walk into the abandoned church, but was grabbed by my wrist. I whirled around and saw Sephiroth had a hold of me, pulling me back to him and his friends who were standing in the shadows still.

"Ciara, you shouldn't run off here. Midgar is dangerous, especially to you." He reminded me. I bit my lip and looked away, hand limp in his grasp. Sephiroth wouldn't understand why I had come to Midgar and why I had run here. I couldn't tell him, not just because he was from Shin Ra. That didn't matter to me. It was because I knew he wouldn't understand.

"Try, Ciara. Tell me." He ordered, making me snap my head around to stare at him. He knew? He knew that I was being drawn here? He... was trying to understand? My heart clenched painfully, then melted. He cares, though he doesn't exactly know how to show it.

I tugged gently, expecting him to let go of my hand. Instead, he shifted his grip so he wasn't holding my wrist and laced his fingers through with mine, stepping into the sunshine so that his silver hair glowed. He waited patiently and I smiled, tightening my hold on his hand and turning, headed straight for the church. Without complaint he followed me inside. Angeal and Genesis came as well, confused and intrigued by my behavior, and obviously flabbergasted at their friend's. His holding my hand was embarrassing and upsetting my equilibrium, despite the leather gloves separating our flesh. If I ever touched this man skin on skin I'd probably pass out or scream, or something even more embarrassing. The power he has over me is scary. So I just ignored it as I led Sephiroth to the front of the church where the floor had long ago degraded and empty earth stood. Releasing him, I knelt and sank my fingers into the soil.

"Sephiroth... you remember... how I saved your life, right?" I asked. The silver haired man knelt beside me and nodded, watching what I was doing. "And you know how I can enhance and maximize your materia to mastery level without having to go through the process of utilizing them in real life scenarios, too, right?" Again, he nodded. (That little skill of mine was actually something he liked using. He would send me new materia he had and have me master them for him and return them to him.) I took a deep breath and turned my face to him, meeting his eyes squarely. "That skill... is changing and I don't really know why. Do you... trust them?" I asked, flicking my eyes over to Genesis and Angeal, sitting in the front row pews and watching us closely, though respecting my privacy too. They're good men, though I felt from them the same wrongness I had felt in Sephiroth from the very beginning, just not as strongly.

The first class SOLDIER didn't even hesitate. "With my life. And yours." He said. Hearing the confidence and the comradery in his voice decided it for me. I nodded again and looked down at my hands, buried in the dirt. taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes and focused. Flowing through this dirt was the lifestream, fertile and rich with life. Many things could be done with it, but what I loved to do the most when the lifestream was so close to the surface was to manifest it in a form that brought happiness and peace. I called the lifestream up and heard the three SOLDIERs gasp as the powerful energy burst out of the ground and coiled around me. It shied away from Sephiroth, fearing his darkness, but I just coaxed it closer to me and directed it to the ground I had my hands in. Then, I let my emotions flow out. My power, my skill, was connected to my heart and my feelings, an unstoppable force limited only by the physical restraints of my body. The joy I felt at finally seeing Sephiroth again, the happiness at knowing he had good friends and even the humor of the situation earlier all bubbled up and burst into life in a shower of lifestream that crystallized into the form of beautiful and fragrant, pure flowers. I opened my eyes and saw that the entire floor of the church that had been bare dirt earlier was now carpeted in flowers. I pulled my hands out of the soil and wiped them clean on my skirt, leaving brushes of dirt on the blue fabric. I looked over at Sephiroth, who was staring at the flowers hard, his face emotionless but his eyes flickering as he thought.

I smiled sadly, knowing the problem. As a SOLDIER working for Shin Ra, seeing what I had just done meant that he was obligated to turn me in to the research and development department so that Shin Ra would develop new and more powerful ways of controlling the lifestream. But at the same time, he owed me a life debt and I was something of a friend to him. He didn't want to turn me in. I had come to Midgar knowing I would have to show him this ability of mine. The dreams and visions the planet showed me when I was sleeping and awake, or when I meditated, were clear in my ability having something to do with saving the planet. And sometimes, the visions showed me using this skill to save Sephiroth from a darkness so complete and terrifying that my soul shivered to think of what it could be.

"Like I said, I'm an epic gardener now. I can do more than just enhance materia. Where there is a strong concentration of undiluted and free flowing lifestream my abilities are... out of control almost." I whispered, resting back on my haunches and staring at the beauty before me. "I've made these flowers burst into bloom sometimes just by laughing in areas like that. It's getting harder for me to control and I'm afraid I'll end up in a laboratory."

"If that is your fear, Ciara, then why show this to us?" Angeal's kind voice made me turn to look at him. He had stood and approached the bed of flowers cautiously, bending down to pluck on blossom and study it closely. The flower glowed a little in his hand, though in a few hours I knew that the magical light revealing how they came into being would fade and they would become normal flowers. Unless tended, they would also fade within a few days. But I didn't tell them that. I just watched the warrior smile absently at the flower in his hand before tucking it into his belt and meeting my eyes steadily.

"All three of us are Shin Ra SOLDIERs and obligated to report someone like you." I met his Mako blue gaze without flinching and smiled at him, causing the man to raise an eyebrow and take a step back.

"For all that you are, you are also three men bound by certain codes. Genesis follows the path of a warrior, fighting as a SOLDIER to protect Shin Ra and the people of Gaia. He won't turn me in because he knows how crazy the scientists are. Angeal, you follow the code of honor, and bound by this, you will not turn a woman over to men as cruel as Hojo and Hollander, not when it is clear that I am... special. And Sephiroth... he is bound by his own heart. As long as his heart and his mind remain his, pure and whole, I am safe with him." I answered them, standing and turning around fully, my skirts swishing out around me as I did so.

"I came here because I need help. I don't know where else to go. My abilities... I know about them, more than I can tell you, but I don't know where to get help. Normal people are terrified of me. Only SOLDIERs like yourself understand, since you as well might have the planet flowing through your veins." Even as I spoke, though, I knew that was wrong. They were infused with Mako, which was derived from the planets pain, and not from her gifts. And whatever it was that made them powerful and strong was not our goddesses gift. But I kept my council, knowing that sharing such words with them would do more harm than good. Sometimes, I curse my ability to sense the truth. I sighed and dropped my head, clasping my hands in front of me. Just keep talking, CIara. You have to get help.

"I abhor death and violence. I cannot stand Shin Ra for what it does to this planet and to the people, like the Wutai. But despite that, I know that the people of Shin Ra aren't all bad. So I try to help everyone. And despite what you may think I can help you. All I ask is that someone helps me, too. I'm at my limit. I can't control or hide this for much longer and I don't know what else to do." I said, feeling tears building in my eyes. My abilities were getting more and more powerful by the day, and the visions I saw more terrifying. Death and suffering, destruction, Chaos, it was all dancing across my mind without cease. It was like the planet knew something horrible was building up and getting ready to burst forth, and she needed her defenders strong. I didn't know, for certain, how many with the blood of my people in their hearts yet lived, so I didn't know how many the planet was calling upon to rescue her. But I knew that whomever was called up to do the saving would need help. I know that I would not be the one to save her; my destiny lied in providing the means to do so. I was the help the planet needed prepared, if the darkness was going to fall soon.

My sudden increase in power and the fear my visions inspired lead me to believe that it would. I know I will be vital to providing some sort of help to the one truly called upon to save Gaia. I know little of what I could do. Though I have strong healing powers, they were too strong to be used on people not directly infused with Mako. So, I could only heal and cure someone like Sephiroth or someone who, like me, was connected closely to the planet. I could control and direct the white holy power of this planet, but that power was too dangerous and uncontrollable to be used unless dire need prompted its release. It is an ability so rare that my ancestors whisper of it in the lifestream as a faint memory, nothing more. Yet I have the power, so the planet must know that I will be called upon to use it. She showed it to me when I was six and I have known and accepted my destiny since then. And even then... I shook my head. I would need warriors and people with pure hearts to do the actual saving. But until then, I needed help finding them and staying alive long enough to prepare them. And the only person I could think of to help me... was a person most people were terrified of.

I squeaked when I felt someone ruffle my hair and looked up to see Genesis and Angeal standing before me with little smirks on their faces, Angeal pulling his hand away from my head. "Keeping secrets from the company is fun. So of course we will help you. Plus, any friend of his is a friend of ours." Angeal said, jabbing his thumb at Sephiroth who had somehow moved up beside me silently without my knowing. I looked up into the SOLDIERs eyes. He nodded his head and put his hand on my shoulder.

"I have no problem with helping you, as long as it does not conflict with my regular mission as a SOLDIER for the president." He said, making me giggle a little as I shrugged his hand off me, not because I didn't like it, but because I did. And that disturbed me.

"Like keeping me a secret from Hojo isn't conflicting?" I asked lightly, lifting my arms and spinning in a circle in the middle of the flowers I had created. Already their radiance was fading a little. The three men chuckled a little at my words, all smiling as the sun painted them in gentle colors. It hit me suddenly, standing there. I looked at the companions and knew, painfully, that this moment of happiness would be one of the last the three were able to enjoy together. Like lightning in a storm, I saw flashes and flickers in my mind. The sorrow and pain in the eyes of Angeal, the utter hopelessness and sudden determination in Genesis'... and the light of kindness fading from Sephiroth's. I stopped twirling and fell to my knees, picking a faintly blue flower and bringing it to my nose.

"I fear that at the end... this will all be for nothing." I whispered, voice choked. Was failure to be my fate, was that why I saw such horrible things?

"Nonsense. We won't just hand you over to Hojo without a fight." Angeal said, misunderstanding my words. I glanced up at him and smiled. Nodding my head, I made a decision. Live for each moment. If our lives were destined to be brief or painful, then I would do my best to provide happiness and joy for the moments in them which I could. These men were not evil or power hungry. They were kind. I saw it inside of them, buried deep beyond the layers most people looked for humanity in. They deserve at least my kindness from me. I nodded and hopped back up to my feet.

"Genesis, allow me to enhance the fire materia in your sword." I said, holding out my hand to him. The redhead looked startled, then unsheathed his sword from his back and popped the fist sized red gem out of the gem slot, handing it to me. Smiling, I cupped both my hands around it and gently called the power out, causing strains of fire to swirl about me. The flames grew hotter and brighter until, suddenly, I covered the materia with my hand and made the power flow cease. The gem was very hot, almost burning, as I handed it back to Genesis, but he didn't seem bothered as he put it back in his weapon. After a moment, he swung the blade and smiled when fire rippled down the red surface. He smiled at me.

"Very nice, my goddess." He said, putting his arm behind his back as he swept me an elegant bow. "Sephiroth, can I have her? She's beautiful, smart, and useful." He said, humor twinkling in his eyes for a moment. Sephiroth sighed and put two fingers to his forehead as he softly shook his head at the man.

Genesis continued to try to bribe me out of Sephiroth's ownership - and I was very much going to have a talk with the man about this whole idea of ownership - when Angeal nudged me with his elbow. I dragged my gaze away from the silver haired devil (how does he command my attention so much when he hardly ever speaks?) and arched an eyebrow at the man. He stared at the flowers in front of us, and sighed.

"I know little about myths and legends in this world." He started, sounding a little self-deprecating. "Sephiroth is actually the most knowledgeable since he spends most of his free time reading." I snorted, not able to imagine the most feared and powerful SOLDIER in Gaia would step foot into a library, let alone open a book willingly.

Angeal nodded. "It's true, he's a total book worm. He has a fascination with knowledge that makes me wonder at why he was made a warrior when his mind is more suited to science. His quarters are so full of books that there isn't any space to sit, except on his bed. So when Genesis and I go there, we are usually left standing. But that's not what I wanted to talk about."

I stepped in front of the raven haired man and grabbed his hands, tilting my head back to meet his kind blue eyes. "I know, and I understand. This is dangerous for all of you. I won't do it again." I said, leaving the blue flower I had plucked in his hands. "They'll fade away in a few days anyway, unless tended. I certainly won't be coming back here to water them with lifestream." Angeal looked down at it with a soft smile and shook his head.

"Not what I was going to say, but I'm glad all the same for the reassurance. You're... special to Sephiroth, in a way I'm sure no other person alive in this world is." We both watched as Genesis got fed up with being ignored by Sephiroth and tried to shove him over, the two SOLDIER's starting a little scuffle. Even though they were just playing around, they were both deadly fast, especially Sephiroth - I almost couldn't follow his movements. But even as he played, his face remained mostly impassive, just the barest hint of a smile turning up the corner of his lips.

"Even with us he is distant, but you... Ciara, as soon as he got your letter he ran, ran down to greet you. Just, whatever you do, whatever he does, please don't leave him. His heart is so fragile, despite how strong people perceive him as, and I know he has entrusted the safety, the purity, the entire thing, to you." Angeal turned and stared me down, his eyes boring into my plain blue ones with an intensity that made me shiver. I could feel the love he had for the two men wrestling like boys across from us, and the sick knowledge in his heart that things were not as they should be in the world. I could hear his fear, beating against my soul, that the company they worked for wasn't pure, and the things they did would eventually tear them apart. And I had the knowledge in me... the planet's whispers, that he was right.

I looked away, unable to hold his stare any longer. With my power, with the knowledge the planet had shown me as a child, with what the ghosting words my sister had been able to decipher from our ancestors in the planet had told us about it, I would most likely not be able to keep the promise Angeal was asking me to give, and I didn't want to lie. However... the memory of the fire surrounding Sephiroth and his dead eyes rose in my mind again. I didn't want that either. Clenching my hands into fists, I locked my gaze onto the silver demon we were talking about. "I... Angeal, I promise just one thing. As long as he wants me, as long as he needs me, I will never leave him, no matter what may happen to me in the end." Sephiroth flipped Genesis and knocked him flat on his back, standing tall and glancing my way. Our eyes met. "After all, ours is a twisted fate." I muttered as he walked over to us, ignoring the whining and moaning friend behind him.

"You and I?" He asked, having heard the last part of my speech to Angeal. Laughing, I nodded and spun around again, slightly shifting myself away from the two SOLDIERs so that I was in the exact middle of the lifestream flowers. Despite the uncertainty of my own future and the futures of those around me, I was strangely happy. Sephiroth didn't seem all that bothered by my words and just watched me with his arms crossed while Angeal helped poor Genesis up, dusting the dirt of the red heads clothes for him. For this moment in time, we were all just young people enjoying life, ignoring the fragile balance we were balanced on which might send everything tumbling into darkness if pushed the wrong way.

The beeping of a phone had us all sobering up. All three SOLDIERs pulled their devices out, but it was Sephiroth's that was ringing. Face going completely blank upon seeing the number, he flipped it open and pressed the phone to his ear. "Yes?" He asked shortly, voice about as inviting as death. The person on the other end spoke, making Sephiroth close his eyes briefly. "No, I was not aware of this. Yes." Another pause. "I said no." He sighed, and now Genesis and Angela were gathered around, looking concerned. "Fine, I will handle the matter myself. Tell the president. I will go tonight." Without saying any more, he hung up. When he looked at me, his eyes were very grim. "Wutai sympathies have risen and created an anti-Shin Ra group, which is apparently lead by a 'Death God of the Battlefield.' They've been terrorizing weapons holds and stealing property. Apparently Veld has been told to handle this matter, but has lost the President's confidence. The job of hunting down the sympathizers and any Wutai has been given to me. I'll be heading to the Corel Area, leaving tonight. I won't be back until I'm done." Each word was a strike to my heart, and he knew it. But he never lies, or hides himself from me. So I just closed my eyes and clasped my hands together, silently praying for the purity of his soul to survive.

"But... what about Ciara?" Angeal spoke the words I'm sure we were all thinking. "She came here for protection. You can't just leave her! I would take her but I recently received new recruits for SOLDIER and I'm training from dusk until dawn. And Genesis will be leaving to go handle the faulty reactors in the Grasslands and their beasts with the engineer team tomorrow!"

I hunched my shoulders and gnawed on my lip. I was causing trouble for everyone. Genesis started into the conversation too, until he and Angeal were both yelling at the silent Sephiroth. This dissention, was it my fault? Their words melded and became a roar that threatened to overtake me.

"Take her with you!" Genesis's shout had silence falling and my eyes popping open.

I stared at him, as did Sephiroth. Genesis crossed his arms. "Just take her with you, then." He repeated, smiling at me. "Then you will be safe, he can be a hero, and we can do our jobs." His voice broke a little at the hero comment and he looked a little upset, but he covered it so quickly that I thought maybe I had imagined it.

Sephiroth shook his head, silver mane shimmering at the motion. "I can't. I will be killing many people and... I helped slay her entire village. I'd rather her not look at me in the midst of battle again." He said, making the other two shut up and look uncomfortable. My mouth twisted. Apparently they hadn't known about that aspect of our relationship. Sephiroth reached into his black leather clothes and pulled out a card key, handing it to me. Confused, I took it. Even when my fingers closed over the plastic, he didn't drop his hands, making me lift my eyes to his.

"That is the only key to my house on the upper plate. It's not on the Shin Ra compound, and no one from Shin Ra will even go there. I usually sleep at my SOLDIER quarters in the main building, so most know nothing of it. It's fully stocked. Stay there and do not leave until I return." He ordered, dropping his hand. His cat eyes flicked over to Angeal. "Take her there for me."

Then, without another word, he turned and slowly walked away, melting into the shadows of the slum area effortlessly, leaving a feeling of ice and pain behind. I clutched the card key to my chest, swallowing hard. Stupid tears burned my eyes. Why? He hadn't done anything wrong. Why was I being stupid? Rubbing my eyes hard, I spun on my heel and faced the remaining two SOLDIERs. "I'm sorry, for making you all argue. It wasn't my intention to cause dissention." I whispered. Genesis walked by me and waved one hand absently as he went.

"That's just the way he is, goddess. Though the 'morrow be barren of promises, nothing shall forestall my return." He said, quoting Loveless again, leaving me and Angeal alone. I peeked over at the other SOLDIER and saw him shaking his head, sighing. Seeing me looking, he just rubbed the back of his neck.

"Those two are totally devoted to their mission, their job. Not to mention their personalities make it rather difficult for others to get used to them and comfortable. So that's why I'm the only trainer for third and second class SOLDIERs. It's complicated. But... Ciara, I'll take you to Sephiroth's house. I didn't even know he had one, but I guess that explains where he vanishes to every once in a while. Let me see the card." I held it up and his eyes scanned it, eyebrows raising and a soft whistle escaping his lips. "Nice part of town. Come on." He grabbed my wrist and started walking.

I wasn't very comfortable with him holding me - with any man holding me actually - so I tugged my arm away and stepped up to his side, keeping pace with him. "Only Sephiroth?" He asked, making me blush. I didn't know why I wasn't bothered by it when it was Sephiroth; if I were to guess, it was probably because his honesty assured me that he was never going to harm me by trying to control my movements. Sephiroth, I knew, would tell me if ever a time came when he was going to kill me; he had assured me of that when we began our unusual relationship years ago. If the time came when my powers became of interest to Shin Ra, he has promised me to kill me himself. I knew Angeal would never hurt me either, but... I just couldn't handle it. He shook his head and smiled.

"I get it. We will have to sneak you up there, since you aren't really cleared. But that's easy. I know many different ways to get you there."

My eyebrows rose at that and he laughed. "All three of us are rather infamous and it is sometimes a hassle to be either swamped in fear or adoration, so we sneak into the upper levels of Midgar frequently. The house Sephiroth has is next to one of the waste vents for the upper plates. They have maintenance hatches next to them that smell something awful and are locked, but with a SOLDIERs clearance level, it's an easy obstacle to overcome. The stench is worse, but you'll safely come out right where we are going." Angeal kept up the commentary as he flirted around the back alley's of the Slums

It was kind of fun to be slipping around like a shadow with Angeal, but my heart was disturbed. Something wasn't right. If I were in a place where the lifestream flowed freely, I would easily be able to pinpoint the source of my unease and help, but here, in this city of steel and stagnant life, my abilities were just able to alert me to issues. It was getting to the point that I was having trouble concentrating from the planet trying to get my attention. She can be a bit bratty sometimes. Angeal stopped in front of a small grated door that was about three feet tall and pulled out his security pass, swiping it. The door beeped and the door opened.

"In here, Ciara. It's a tight fit but if Sephiroth can make it, so can you." He said, gesturing for me to go first. I took one last look around the slums, then drew in a deep breath and ducked into the tiny tunnel.

Angeal had lied about the stench. It wasn't bad. It was nauseating, excruciating, and revolting. The smell rolled over me as soon as I walked into the enclosed space. He worked on resetting the security grate and closing the door behind us while I glanced around. The maintenance tunnel was basically a tiny walkway suspended over the sewers. One wrong step and I'd be swimming in... I shuddered. The walkway was suspended a few short feet from the ceiling, so I was stooped over, and since it was hanging ,the stupid thing swung with every shift of my body. "I don't think I can imagine Sephiroth in here." I croaked as Angeal came back to my side.

He had a cloth pressed against his mouth and nose, handing me one as he shrugged. "He found these secret passages, actually. He grew up in the labs and was studied by Hojo and Gast, so he said he often ran and hid in the vents so that they wouldn't find him, to avoid getting poked and prodded by them for a few hours. Some of his books from his childhood still smell like this, because he dropped a couple." Angeal said, voice muffled. I placed the cloth over my mouth and nose, noticing the slight cologne scent on the fabric. It was definitely Angeal's handkerchief. Even though it reduced the smell, it didn't cancel it out. I groaned in frustration.

"That is it! The faster I'm out of here, the better." I snapped, turning and slowly creeping along the path, heading for the ladder I could see at the end of the way. Since we were going to the upper plates, I figured that was our goal and focused on it. In the middle of the suspended walkway, though, my heart suddenly seized and I fell to my knees, choking. Angeal rushed up and grabbed my shoulders, speaking to me, but I could no longer hear his words. I knew what this was.

When the planet wanted her servant to listen, she would just seize me and force me to heed her words. The pain that came along with having your consciousness lifted from your body was something my mother had told me we eventually got used to. This was the third time it happened, though, and I'm no more used to it than I was before. Back when my mother was still alive, she told me that my ability to hear the planet so clearly, to be able to actually talk to her, was something that hadn't been an ability of our people since the Calamity fell. She thought that the corruption brought to Gaia by the Calamity stripped us of some of our natural powers, and that I was actually the only true one of us left. When she said it that way, I had felt blessed. Until this happened for the first time when I was six, alerting me to the rise of Shin Ra power, my own abilities, and what it would mean for our people. The second time was a few years after my home was destroyed, and had informed me, along with a few other useful bites of information, to not go anywhere near the Nibel Area. It is a warning I have heeded, though I don't know why. But whenever I get close to Nibelheim, I feel... terrified. And now it was happening again. What could the planet have to tell me that was so important she would take me in front of someone? Never before had that happened; usually this type of thing would be done in private!

I bit my tongue hard enough to draw blood, the shock of iron filling my mouth briefly allowing me to croak out a few words to Angeal. "Get me...safe. Please. Fine... I'm..." But then the pull came back stronger and this time the pain ripped me away and I was falling, spiraling down into dank blackness, losing myself.

Then, with a burst of euphoria, ribbons and explosions of life wrapped around me, coiling through me, and came from me, lighting the darkness and feeding the planet with energy and warmth. I opened my eyes and sighed, looking around the shadows. As always, something malevolent was lurking in the purple darkness that my light could not penetrate. It was foul and disturbed, slinking away like evil does, biding its time and waiting for the moment to come and steal all my light from me. I was it's enemy and I knew that. I have been aware of it, whatever it was, since I first came here when I was six. And it has been aware of me, of my blood, and hated me more than anything. But this time, the darkness parted a little and I saw two eyes, filled with unfathomable malice and lust for destruction, glowing sickly eerie greenish yellow blue at me.

_'It is almost time for the next game to begin. You stopped me all those ages ago, and here you are to stop me again. But I have the advantage this time. You are weak, the last, and alone. I have servants all over the planet who help me stop you, drain you, corrupt you. I will not be held back a second time. I will take the life of this world and make it my own.'_ I shuddered. That was the voice of pure, unadulterated evil.

"You are a fragment of shadow. You have no form with which to fight me. I am the planet and the planet is me. As long as one exists so do I. Though I may be alone, my power is enough. I can and will stop you." I shot back, the worlds bubbling forth from some place deep within me. Whenever I came here... I felt like Ciara was only a small part of my being, that I was actually someone else.

When I was six, the feeling of losing myself had terrified me and I had told my mother. But she had just held me and said that Ciara was just a part of me, that I was more than that, more than any of them. When I was born, she told me she heard two names called out from our ancestors who still lived in the lifestream. All of them, all those voices, had all called out two names. Ciara, she told me, was the last name they called and so that was what she chose to call me. I knew, in time, the other name would be revealed, as my destiny unfolded. Given what my powers are, I have some suspicion of what it could be, though I may be thinking too highly of myself. So I welcomed the other me that rose when I was inside the planet's heart. It made me strong enough to face this evil.

Hissing laughter came from the shadow. '_As long as a part of me lives, I survive and can be reborn. I live in others outside. Those foolish mortals on the surface have helped me so much by implanting me inside the body of one who is strong, inside warriors, but one stands above the others, and thus they have created a new self for me to use. That mind is still closed to me and so I am unable to take control of it, but all it will take is a moment of weakness and I will be able to slip inside. Then, when he reaches for me, I will be there to welcome him and control him. And not even you will be able to stop me then. I will destroy this world.'_ The darkness wrapped around the eyes again and faded, leaving me alone in the middle of the swirling lights. My heart ached.

"Who would be cruel enough to take anything from that monster and put it inside someone?" I whispered, hands clenched. The energy swirled around me, but I got no answer. Typical. I sighed and ran a hand back through my blond hair. The planet hadn't brought me here to talk to that evil which never faded. Or maybe it had. I frowned. The darkness had never spoken before. It has always just lurked and watched, wary. Never before had it contained a form or a voice. What was going on?

'_Thousands of years ago, a Calamity fell into the paradise which used to be our homeland. Holy Minerva fought and managed to soften the impact, but the being had landed in our fertile land. Her corruption spread faster than our goddess could fight. Soon our world would be overtaken by the vile parasite. Thus Minerva gave up her body to the planet to allow for Holy to be released. In her sacrifice, the Calamity was sealed away in a Northern Cave, the flow of her corruption halted, squeezed to a trickle. But human greed released her, and Minerva was not yet reborn. Calamity, her body nearly gone but her spirit alive, tricked them into thinking she was us, our blood. So they experimented and created her anew, using her and in doing so giving her corruption places to grow. An innocent has lost his father to love, lost his mother to guilt, and became her child. While yet his mind remains strong, she cannot touch him, but if ever his heart is shaken she will be able to creep into his mind and slowly overtake him, until there is nothing left of him, only her will and her desire. Be strong. Destroy the vessel. Then release yourself to the planet once more, become one with Gaia and her Lifestream, and become our eternal guardian. Thus when Calamity tries to strike again, when darkness threatens us, you can be summoned by one with a pure heart and the true blood, sacrificing all to awaken you from your deep slumber inside the core so that Holy will flow once again._'

The voices of the past danced by, some of the most ancient of all our ancestors speaking to me. Never before had they spoken so directly or clearly about what my purpose was. And I wasn't stupid, I understood exactly what they were saying. Tears welled up in my eyes and rolled down my face, as the visions I had been seeing for the past few months finally clicked in my mind. The darkness I had just faced was no ordinary evil; it was what remained of the dark Calamity which had crashed into Gaia ages past, destroying our pure homeland and leading to the corruption of the lifestream. That she was able to talk and was aware again meant that the corruption had grown large enough to revive her. And she was getting help from humans, albeit unknowingly, as they put her darkness inside others, mistaking it for pure power born of Gaia. I reached up and covered my face with my hands. The planet wanted me to know my enemy.

This wasn't fair. I wasn't strong enough for this. Myself I am willing to destroy and sacrifice. I have always known the nature of my abilities and that eventually I would need to go back to the planet. That was my fate. But I would never want to willingly lose another. However, my power alone could not defeat her. Two would have to make the sacrifice. Me to power it and another unknown to summon that power forth. Even before that, though, I have to destroy a vessel? A person who has unwittingly become the biggest threat to Gaia. It... it's so unfair.

"Why would you make me do this?" I asked, broken. "The person chosen has no knowledge of this. It isn't their fault, and yet you want me to..." The spirits surged around me, encasing me in the loving warmth of my people.

_'Never be afraid to face your destiny, Ciara_.' My head jerked up. My mother's voice soothed my heart. She had never spoken to me here before, despite being a part of the planet now. I think it was probably because she wanted me to let go of her and the past, and live only for the future. Though we value our history well, my people have always lived solely for the future. So my past, my mother, or my sister, never spoke to me though I knew both of them to be living in the planet now. '_Remember to find love. If you love and protect that love with all your heart, the beauty of this world can be saved. No destiny is absolute. No future is without ability to change. Love, Ciara, is something the Calamity cannot comprehend. Even if her wishes succeed, if the one she wishes to use holds love, she will never totally be in control. And thus, she will be defeated. So go back, daughter. Go back, and love._'

I bit my lip, but nodded. That was something I could very easily do. "Alright. I'll try." I whispered as the beautiful energy rose up higher around me, cutting off the impending darkness from my view, and carrying me away with it. The pain of leaving my body was nothing compared to the pain of reentering it. With a wrench, my soul plunged back into my body, the pain of muscles that had seized and cramped making me cry out in agony, the blood rushing through cold limbs causing fire to spread throughout my body. But gentle hands grabbed my shoulders as I struggled, panting, to sit up.

"Ciara! I've got you, you're alright." Angeal...For some reason, I knew I could trust this man. Knowing I was safe, I allowed my pain filled brain to shut down and fell into blissful unconsciousness.


	3. Chapter 3

0011, Mountains, Nibel Area

"When she woke up, Ciara told me wha' was wrong wit ther. I don' know why she trusted me w'it the knowledge, but she did. She 'plained everythang. How she was connected to the planet, how she could see the future, and how she had some sort o' destiny waitin' fer her. She even tol' me what she was. I didn't think ta question it. An' I never tol' Sephiroth. Something in me tol' me that I shouldn't tell him about her. Maybe if I had, he wouldn' have fallen. Maybe he would 'ave recognized the truth of that monster in Nibelheim. I jus' don' know. But I made it my mission to keep Ciara safe after I learned what fate she had waitin' fer her. Fer months, I took care o' 'er in'tween caring for the new recruits. An' when the Gongaga boy started meeting wit the girl at the church Ciara made bloom wit flowers years later, I kept the resemblance between them secret too. An' with my silence, protected her as well. At da time, it was all I tho't I could do. She reminded me of Ciara and I wanted ta protect her like I failed to protect Ciara. All I ever did was hide the knowledge I 'ad when I proberly should 'ave shared it. But my lamentations now mean nothin', since what Ciara feared came 'bout anyway, despite her 'ttempt ta stop it." Cid finished reading his stack of papers and looked up. The group was still sitting in front of the falling down shack, eyes intent as they all listened to what was being told them. The sun was moving lower in the sky but none of the people listening seemed to care that night was falling.

Reeve and Cid moved off to gather firewood, understanding the unspoken agreement that the party was going to camp in the valley until they debunked the mystery Angeal's notes had left them with. And somehow, they knew not to disturb the dilapidated house; something about the rotting structure warned them away from trying to steal warmth with its wood. Barrett sighed and stretched his gun arm over his head.

"I don't get it. This Ciara girl went to find SOLDIERs to get help, but ain't they the ones who would become the baddies eventually? Wasn't it the SOLDIERs who had Jenova cells implanted in them?" He asked, a look of confusion dancing across his broad, brown face. Tifa, leaning against the silent, brooding Cloud, sighed.

"Nobody knew that back then, Barrett. We only discovered that stuff when we started digging into the files at the Nibelheim Mansion. Besides, she needed people who wouldn't be afraid of her abilities. SOLDIERs are pretty much not afraid of anything." She said, resting her head on the blond man's shoulder. He nodded his agreement but didn't speak. The brief mention of the boy from Gongaga in this section of memories had probably shaken him, so she didn't press him to speak.

Yuffie sat up from stretching on the ground and jumped to her feet, leaping all over the clearing as she tried to keep her limbs from falling asleep. "Yeah, sure, but this girl... she's like her but her abilities seem to be on a completely different level than hers were; even he said he saw a resemblance between them if that little thingy at the end is referring to the church where she got her flowers from. If that is so, how come all this bad stuff still happened?" She asked, landing near Vincent, who reached out and smoothed her hair down absently.

"It might have happened in spite of her efforts, as Angeal claims." He said shortly, handing the next paper stack to the spunky ninja girl. She pouted, then plopped down on the ground at his feet and started shuffling the pages around. "We won't know until we read more." She crossed her eyes and stuck her tongue out at the tall man.

"Whatever. Alright, let's see... 'As I mentioned previously, during that time, I was busy with the training of the new SOLDIER recruits so I didn't really get to see Ciara that much, though I made sure she had everything she could possibly need. After what happened to her in the maintenance vents, though, I was worried that she was sick, an illness reflecting the state of the planet, and that she might die. Sephiroth had gone silent on his mission, not that I would have told him she was ill for fear of distracting him. And his not being around seemed to sadden Ciara, so I tried not to bring him up on the rare occasions I got to sneak away and check up on her. He came back a few weeks before fall fell, and it was his return that really started all the problems that led to his eventual downfall. I don't know if I could have stopped it then or not, though. Perhaps, but then... I don't think it would have made any difference at all... And who had a right to stop such a beautiful thing from forming anyway? The bond created, though, was the eventual chink in his armor which allowed that darkness to rise inside him...'"

1998, Midgar, October

I don't know how much money Shin Ra pays its employees, but Sephiroth was most likely rolling in the dough. His house was nice. Ever since the day Angeal snuck me here through the maintenance tunnel, I've spent most of my time inside. It's beautiful, and his nice tastes really show here. Everything is elegant. Some of his artifacts from his travel are hanging on the walls or displayed on his shelves. I have even found some of the gifts I've sent him displayed, like the fossilized rock I found that looked like him. His furniture is rough and masculine, bare woods and dark leathers. And books. He has so many books around that I sometimes find myself wondering what type of man he would have been if he wasn't a SOLDIER. I've always known that Sephiroth is smart; his dry wit and humor allude to that, and his amazing strategizing on the battlefield were legendary. But his intelligence goes beyond that. He's got books on poems, plays, great epics, and not so well known literary marvels. He has science reports on the various ancient cultures of Gaia, some that disturb me for their accuracy, penned by a man named Gast, like he had spoken to someone who listened to the planet.

And those were just the books that I read. He had so many that though I tried to read one every day, I never ran out of material. I spent the majority of my days on the first floor of his house, where a guest bedroom, bathroom, the kitchen and the living room were located. Angeal had shown me the entire house before he left after making certain I was alright that first day, including the upstairs, but since the second story was Sephiroth's personal living space, I felt... awkward about intruding. I hadn't even set foot in his bedroom when Angeal showed me where it was. It just.. .wasn't right. Hence, I limited myself to the first floor. Everything I needed to be comfortable was there anyway so I really had no reason to go upstairs. And whenever Angeal came over, which was rare or just to make sure I was still alive before heading out to train his minions, he never asked if I had gone up stairs or not. I don't even think he thought that I was living on the first story only.

So I was curled up on the big black leather couch in the first floor living room, wrapped in a soft white blanket that smelled like Sephiroth (not that I made it a habit of sniffing the guy) when the front door banged open. Since no one, and I mean no one, had ever used the front door (Angeal and I snuck in through the back door, which was were the tunnel let out), I was frozen in my seat, plain shocked into inaction. But when my eyes adjusted to the sudden influx of light, I recognized the tall, wiry form weaving in the doorway.

"Sephiroth!" I gasped, jumping up and making to go towards him. He lifted his head sharply, his cat like eyes pinning me where I stood. He shook his head and straightened his spine, turning to look behind him. He shifted his body to block the view of the doorway, broad shoulders and the leather clothes providing an effective wall. What was he...?

"Veld, I'm fine; it was just a bullet wound, and I can take care of it myself. Go report; you were the assigned head of this mission, not me, and the President is waiting." He spoke coldly, but the chill that suddenly overtook me had nothing to do with the frost flowing from his mouth. Someone from Shin Ra, someone he obviously didn't trust, was standing outside his house, behind him. I was standing in the doorway of his living room. If that person came inside, I would be seen. There wasn't anywhere for me to go.

A heavy silence filled the space around Sephiroth, then a suave, suspicious voice spoke. "I guess that was my assigned position, though from the way everyone was looking to you for orders I must have forgotten that." Snarky. "When did you get his house, Sephiroth? I thought you lived in the SOLDIER dorms like all other Shin Ra personnel. Or is it an expenditure for... personal pleasure?" Oh the suspicion and hatred in that voice... I drew in my lip and started gnawing on it. Sephiroth didn't even flinch.

"I am the President's bodyguard and get sent on more mission of top secrecy than even you Turks. I am entitled to a personal residence, for when I want to escape military life. Despite what you and the other Turks seem to think, I do enjoy my quiet time. I also ran out of room for my books in my HQ dorm. Good night." Sephiroth slammed the door and stomped inside, easily bending and scooping me up in his arms and he walked quickly up the stairs.

My breath flew out of me. My cheek was pressed against the leather on his shoulder, and even through the thick material, I could feel the shifting of his muscles and the heat of his skin. And his silver hair fell over his shoulder to curtain me in a soft veil filled with his wild, untamable scent. My cheeks heated up, and I glanced down. Only then did I notice the bleeding circular hole in the idiots disturbingly chiseled chest. My hands flew up to the wound and I gaped at him.

"Sephiroth put me -" One sharp look from him had the exclaimed words dying in my throat. Reaching the door to his room, he kicked it open and stormed in, letting me fall onto the bed while he stalked over to the window and opened it, leaning out.

"Veld, call your Turk spies off or I will kill them for annoying me." He shouted, voice not betraying an iotum of pain despite what I could feel in his aura. Someone swore outside and then I saw a flash of red as a person came out of hiding in the tall tree in the next door neighbors yard, and walked away. Sephiroth closed the window and drew the black curtains, plunging the room into shadow. Moving in a stiff motion quite unlike his normal fluidity, he turned on a muted lamp that added a soft glow to the space. When he faced me again, I bit my lip and hesitated, but he knew. He always knows. "Don't worry. The house wasn't under surveillance the whole time. Just the past hour. Veld doesn't trust me, but he isn't rash or illogical either."

As he spoke, Sephiroth was unbuckling the pauldrons from his shoulders and pulling the heavy leather material he wore like a trench coat under them off, leaving his upper chest mostly bare. The gloves were yanked off next, but when he reached around to try to unbuckle the two crossing suspenders holding the stomach protector up, he winced and stopped mid motion as blood ran in a fresh river down his chest. I jumped up and shoved his arms down, face burning red and entire body trembling as my ghosting fingers finally made contact with him skin on skin.

I drew away for a second, then bent over, fumbling with the straps and trying to keep the amount of contact between my skin and his to a minimum. It was hot, searing me, almost like the contact between us created a fire. I flicked my gaze up quickly to see if he felt the untamable reaction between us. He was watching me carefully, eyes carefully blank. I take that as, yes, he is aware of the trembling of my skin and the tautness of his own body. My body screamed finally finally as my fingers ghosted over his surprisingly smooth skin, trying to ignore the sculpted muscles sliding smoothly under his flesh and twitching each time my fingers slipped off the leather material and brushed against him. I guess he isn't used to physical contact much at all, since he constantly covers his entire body in leather. As I hurried to free him from his armor and clothes, I couldn't help but run my eyes over his body. The guy was startlingly built despite his unearthly and almost feline beauty. Shaking my head, I forcibly dragged my mind away from his overwhelming physicality and tried to focus on the task at hand.

I tossed the reinforced metal aside once the suspenders were free, leaving Sephiroth in just his pants and boots. The bullet wound was large and inflamed, looking nasty as it wept red just under his left pectoral muscle. It was dangerously close to his heart and might have punctured a lung. Even though I'm not doctor, I could tell this was a serious injury, one that should have been treated and tended as soon as possible. But the edges of the wound were furled and puckered, and dried blood was caked to his skin. These signs were clear in their message. He hadn't gotten treated. Why? Shin Ra would not risk losing Sephiroth, not when his power and skills were so vital to their continued domination. I sucked in a pained breath and glanced up at him. His eyes were focused on me, unblinking in their intensity.

"Why hasn't this been treated, Sephiroth?" I asked softly, clenching my hands in the strands of hair that fell down his back to keep my hands from tracing his muscles. The desire to do so was pounding against my skull and threatening to overwhelm me, so I tightened my hold on his hair, thanking him silently for being such a girl about his flowing locks for once, since it was the only thing keeping me from petting this untouchable man.

"Since I was saved by you in Wutai, I have never let another medic or scientists close to me, and tended all my wounds myself, and other than the required physical every two years, never go to the labs. I... what you did, I think it left traces in my body, and if I reflect abnormalities, Hojo will be fanatical about finding their source. So I handle these myself, and I will treat this one myself as well, if you would get my materia for me." He said it so emotionlessly that for a second, I didn't understand. He pulled my hands free of his hair and then dropped them, clearly unable to move his arms much because of the pain of his wound. That he had carried me early probably wasn't helping. Then his words clicked and as the tears built up in my eyes, I gently shoved him down on to the bed, so he was sitting and no longer towering over me. He had protected me at the cost of his own suffering. My heart squeezed painfully when I looked into his eyes again, emotions welling dangerously high inside me.

Without thinking, I straddled his lap and pressed my palm against the wound. Sephiroth did not know the full extent of my powers and abilities. In truth, they've grown to terrifying levels in the past three years. I no longer need a materia to heal someone who could handle my type of power, which should not be possible for a normal human. Then again... I met his beautiful cat-green eyes. Neither one of us is exactly human, I don't think. Without warning him, without even speaking, I unleashed the full power of my healing ability. Lifestream flared up around me in twirls and orbs of light, and I directed it into his body through my hands, slapping my other hand to his side so I would be able to make a circular, healthy flow of lifestream to deal with the blood loss. His back stiffened as the shock of the power entering the body isn't easy, but I leaned against him, holding him still with my weight on his legs and pressing against his chest. My eyes slid halfway closed as the power rose within me. In my mind I could map out the damage and direct the energy to repairing it. Really I was only using the bodies healing ability to heal and speeding up and improving that natural process.

Since he is a SOLDIER and genetically altered, the natural recuperative powers of his body are already abnormally high, so I'm just accelerating them even more. Something about his abilities was actually off, but I didn't have the luxury of focusing on too many things at once so I brushed my concerns to the side and just utilized his weirdness to promote his recovery. While healing him, I sought out the so called "abnormalities" that had resulted from my first healing. He was right; traces of my power still lingered in him, probably because I had been so emotionally unstable and untrained when I treated him. I used my current strength to burn those traces away, cleansing his body of any residue of my gift. But how had he been able to tell my power was still in him? The trace energy wasn't strong enough to carry my unique power signature and so should be read like any natural flow of lifestream that all people on Gaia have inside; nothing about it should have alerted him to it being different.

Sephiroth suddenly grabbed my wrists, the strength in his hands bruising and the pain causing me to break out of the healing trace I was halfway in. I jerked my head up. His eyes were sharp and piercing, but I could see the pain in them. This healing should not be hurting him. The power of the planet is not corrosive to her children. Was he hurt somewhere else? "What's wrong?" I whispered, not drawing my hands away from his chest. I couldn't; I was still knitting together torn blood vessels and mangled flesh. To stop now would be dangerous.

"Burns." He whispered, the word curt and cut off. At my confused look, he clarified. "This healing... it burns." He nodded his head to the Lifestream dancing around us. That... wasn't possible. Even with my weird abilities and his genetically manipulated body, that just wasn't possible. The body is made up of lifestream and welcomes it. Even though his contains high levels of mako, which is just super distilled and refined lifestream, his body should be absorbing my power, not fighting it, and definitely not burning. The only thing I have knowledge of which denies the lifestream is the corruption of the Calamity but there is no way for that dark power to -

'_Those foolish mortals on the surface have helped me so much by implanting me inside the body of one who is strong..._' The words of the evil voice which had spoken to me from the heart of the planet echoed painfully in my mind. My heart thudded against my breast as horror grew inside me. No! Closing my eyes fully, I sent my spirit along with the lifestream flowing into Sephiroth's body, a skill I had never used on someone connected to Shin Ra before. With this amount of immersion, I was able to see how his body was actually fighting my healing. Looking closer, it became clear.

His wrongness, that darkness I always sensed, the corrupt lifestream that covered Sephiroth's sword when he summoned it, came not from the weapons of Shin Ra and not from his actions as a SOLDIER, but from himself. His body was littered with it. The mako pumping through his veins was dark and deadly, not the stuff one usually found in a reactor. His cells, down to the deepest level, were bonded with a corruption so vile that even my light could not get near it. When I tried, I heard only dark laughter and a violent thirst for destruction which repelled me. This darkness was taking him over from the inside out, an insidious evil he had no chance of fighting. 'Destroy the vessel' The ancestors had spoken those words. The vessel... for the rebirth of the Calamity... was it truly him? It couldn't be. I refuse to believe it. I needed to look at Angeal and Genesis at this level as well. Surely this was just the travesty that Shin Ra did to make SOLDIERs. Sephiroth wasn't the one I was... I couldn't finish the thought. Being surrounded by the corruption inside his body was starting to cause me pain. I had to leave.

Soul shivering, I retreated back my body and silently finished the healing, tears streaming down my face constantly. Sephiroth's body was tense the entire time, the pain I was causing probably equal to if not more than the pain of the original injury, though he didn't try to stop me or make a sound. Seeing it pained me, as it was more proof I didn't want to face. To be so sensitive to my purity... he has to have been exposed to that darkness since conception, and repeatedly infused with dark mako to make it grow. That he is still himself and so strong, so pure... is a testament to his strength and a painful vision of the man he could have been if not for fate. I wept harder as I healed him, biting back sobs as my power, which was the embodiment of this planet's life, was also a power which, if his darkness continued to grow, could ultimately destroy him.

Once the hole in his chest was sealed and all danger to his life, at present, handled, I drew my palms away from his skin and went to get off of him, weary and saddened in a way I had not been since my village's slaughter. This was too much for me to handle right now. I need time, to gather my thoughts and pray. I need to talk to my ancestors again and find out the truth so I can prepare myself for it, to be ready. To be able to face him and my destiny. I need to call Angeal and get him to allow me to study SOLDIER bodies so I can discern the truth. Except, Sephiroth refused to release me. His hands tightened around my arms, and I lifted my head, staring into his face.

"Why do you weep?" He asked, true concern flickering across his eyes. In them I read compassion and loyalty, a faith in good and a desire to preserve peace, and also a naive innocence that was truly out of place in such a dangerously cold man. And behind them... I saw gleaming yellow, waiting, lurking, for a moment to destroy it all. The tears flowed faster. "Ciara?" His concern was palpable now, hands shifting from my arms to my hair. I jolted when his fingers dove into the heavy mass of gold I had tied into a tail with a ribbon. The empty matera he had gifted me with was nestled in the center of that bow. His fingers briefly touch it, but he quickly developed a soothing stroking pattern along the tail with his hands.

Unable to suppress it any longer, I latched onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck and digging my fingers into his hair as I buried my face against his throat. My tears splashed against his bare skin, but he said nothing, did nothing except stroke my hair as he waited for my tears to stop. But they wouldn't They just kept breaking out of me, along with deep, painful sobs and gasps for air. I clutched at him tighter. The harder I fought against the truth, the more clear it became to me, and the harder I cried.

How had I not seen this before? Even without the voice of the ancestors, it was patently obvious to anyone with a brain that Sephiroth was not like the other SOLDIERs, especially not like the only other two first class SOLDIERs in existence. For one thing, his eyes were not pure mako blue but a glowing, disturbingly eerie green. From records I have been finding scattered about his house, His skills have always been unparallelled, almost beyond superhuman, since his youth, before his dark mako infusion began at all. And his appearance was a marker of something different going on at the genetic level. No living being on Gaia had hair of silver. Even my people, who are directly connected to the very core of the planet, do not have silver hair. It is not natural to Gaia. I should have at least suspected... Why hadn't I? In all other areas of my life I am astute and far seeing, but only when it comes to him why am I so uncertain and confused? Why? Clinging to him, smelling his scent and feeling his warmth as he let me against his strong body, the answer came in the beating of my heart and the desperation in my hold.

I have unwittingly blinded myself. Ever since we saved each other six years ago, Sephiroth has become my crutch, someone I depend upon. I recognized all his unnatural qualities, but I justified them as him being one of the warriors chosen to help me fight the impending danger. I made him into an ally, when I should have been considering the possibility of his being the danger. Why did I do that? My duty is to the planet and she always allows for me to see clearly despite the conflict and darker emotions which exist in my human heart, by filling it with a pure love and - I gasped and froze suddenly.

'Remember to find love.' My mother's words came to me as my eyes widened and I loosened my choke hold on Sephiroth. Oh, no. Please, no no. I begged within my mind, but I knew it was useless. Love was a pure emotions, one that Minerva herself would not fight. If my sight was colored by love, even if wrong, she would allow it. Because the light of love could change even a destiny that seemed impossible to fight. But this... there was little hope for any change in the fate binding me now. Pain stabbed at me, breaking through my sobbing with the cold clarity of an inescapable fate. Sensing I was calming down a little, Sephiroth grabbed my shoulders and pulled me back from him a little, so he could see my face. I stared at him, the sharp angles and defined lines of his too-beautiful face, and the complexity of his soul reflecting to me in his eyes. And for the first time, I examined my heart, too. It was fragile, bruised and frightened, incredibly tentative, but... there nonetheless. Reaching up, I cupped my trembling hands around his face, leaving a hairs breadth of space between my skin and his so that I wasn't actually touching him but could feel his heat. His eyes widened and he was clearly uncomfortable with my unprecedented actions, but he did not pull away.

"Oh, Sephiroth..." I breathed, my pain choking me. If I was right... if he was the vessel - and I know it with a certainty born from this planet that I'm damnably right - then I would not be able to do what was being asked of me. I can't. Until the day I see these eyes become hers, I cannot do what the planet needs me to do. And my weakness was condemning him to a terrible fate. My destiny was set, and in setting it, I was damning him and leading myself down the path of failure. Those dark visions would become reality.

"I'm so sorry. Please forgive me..." My ragged whisper tore from my throat as my hands slipped free from his face, falling into my lap. I couldn't let him know. None of it. What his destiny is, mine... and definitely what is in my heart. I can never let him know. Why had I been given this terrible fate? Why? Knowing what my destiny is, I could accept that. I've been prepared for it since I was six and first entered the core of the planet, having my powers revealed to me. Though it was painful and terrible to know that, I was able to live with it because I knew Sephiroth would survive. But now... my hands curled. I can't destroy him. I just can't do that to a person I know is innocent of so much wrong. Whatever other sins he has committed, and I know there to be plenty of those, he has done nothing to deserve becoming Calamity's vessel.

His hands slid away from my arms and I slumped more, unable to support myself. The weight of this knowledge was going to crush me. Fingers hardened from years of wielding a sword to take lives lifted my chin.

"What are you apologizing for?" Sephiroth asked, studying my face intently. The intelligence in his eyes probed at me. He was smart; if I didn't play my cards right I could wound him to the very soul. He hates the monsters spawned by mako reactors, sees that part of his job as the one he thinks of as the most honorable and redeeming. To tell him about his own birth... that I could not do. I swallowed hard.

Protect him. I am going to protect him. It may be silly, to think of me keeping safe probably the most dangerous being in Gaia, but I would do it. Though the effort would probably cost me my soul and life in the end... I would do it. I will hide from him the pain of the past he knows nothing about and I will keep from him the truth of mine. To him I will offer what only I can give. Pure, unabashed, unadulterated love. I could feel the warmth of my mother glowing within me, and the resigned sighs of my other ancestors agreeing to my choice. Never has one of my people taken the easy road. We are a warrior race in our own right and will do anything and everything to protect both the planet and the people on it, no matter how flawed or worn they get. And I felt their agreement inside my heart. To destroy now what had been made evil by chance would be wrong. He must be free to make the choice. He can accept his destiny and damn himself, or fight for it and gain a chance for a better future. And if he chooses evil... then so be it. I will do what must be done. Decision reached, I reached up and tried to wipe off my wet face.

"For... for hurting you. And for keeping my ability a secret. I just... thought it would be too much to ask, to make you lie about someone with a gift like mine." I spoke softly, glancing away from him to collect myself. "I know I shouldn't have done it, but you already risk so much just by being my friend." With a little wet laugh, I met his gaze again. "But you've been suffering to protect me. I erased all traces of my gift from within you." Would doing so allow for more darkness to take control of him? Had my small trace of power been keeping him pure? The worry threatened to climb back up into my throat again so I fought it down.

Drawing in a deep breath, I climbed off his lap and wrapped my arms around my body, shivering. Facing the corruption riddling his body, that taint of Calamity, had seriously sapped at my powers. My body is fragile, and cannot handle the strain of too much darkness. On top of that, to heal as I do takes energy, more than a human naturally has to spare. I needed to rest, but... I glanced up at Sephiroth again. So does he.

"Though I've healed you, your body is still weak. You need to rest. I'll call Angeal and let him know you're back." I said, seeing his phone sticking out of an inner pocket on his trench coat, I picked it up off the ground, surprised at how heavy the thing was. You'd think from the way he whipped around in it that the coat was light, but now that I had it in my hands, I could feel some sort of metal reinforcing inside the leather covering. So it really was armor after all. And here I was thinking it was a truly bad fashion choice.

"Ciara." His deep voice made me freeze, coat partially folded over my arm. "I am no fool. When you healed me six years ago, I felt no pain, yet now I did. And the fault, I think, lies in me, not your expanding abilities. When we are both recovered you will tell me what has caused this abnormal reaction I have to the power you possess." I shivered again, though this time it was not from the fatigue wrecking my body. Those eyes... the eyes staring me down were not the gentle eyes of the man I knew. They were cold and ruthless. This was the face of the SOLDIER first class whom caused fear in the hearts of all in Gaia. Never had Sephiroth looked at me like that before. It chilled me to the bone and made me want to run screaming from the room. But... I steeled my spine and leveled a glare at him.

"What I choose to reveal and what I choose to hide is of no concern to you as long as it does not affect my life debt to you. I apologize for keeping my healing abilities from you but that is all. Now you will rest or I will make you." I snapped back, watching the ice in his eyes melt a little as his natural arrogance reacted to my words.

"Make me, Ciara?" He challenged, voice still scarily calm but this time I could read the undertone of humor in it. "I have not been made to do anything since I broke Hojo's arm for trying to run another rest on me." I shook my head at him and laid the coat over the back of the large leather chair in the corner of the room.

"You of all people should not how tenacious I am. And also the fact that I know you have a sleep materia in your library downstairs. One I enhanced for you. If I were to use that on you, you'd be sleeping until next month. So don't push your luck and rest. I'm going to call Angeal." I told him, glowering until he sighed and nodded, reaching down to unbuckle the belt at his hips. At that, I flushed and backed up. "Wh-what are you doing?" I squeaked. He narrowed a bland look my way.

"I sleep nude."

The completely calm tone in which it was delivered and the completely nonchalant look he gave me was too much. I shrieked and ran from the room, phone clutched in my hands as I hid my red face behind my hair. He slept naked. The image kept popping up unbidden in my mind, that white flesh pulled taut over wiry muscles gleaming in soft morning light, uncovered by any leather or cotton. His silver hair streaming about his body, inviting my hands to sink into it - No no no! I shook my head and leaned hard against the wall, biting my lip. He's a SOLDIER, for Gaia's sake, and a man most women find too terrifying to fantasize about. Not to mention you are harboring suspicion he may be the threat against the planet. Get a grip on yourself, Ciara!

Blowing out a breath, I hurried to the armchair I had been curled up in before and wrapped myself in the white blanket there before flipping open the phone. I scrolled through until I found Sephiroth's contacts list. Angeal's number was the first. Then Genesis. After that... the only other number on his phone was work. How... lonely.

I selected Angeal and pressed the phone to me ear, playing with the edges of the blanket as I listened to it ring. On the third ring, Angeal picked up.

"Sephiroth, what the heck! I've been worried about you. Listen, you need to hurry to your house. Ciara's been worried about you too, you know." He said, not waiting to hear the person on the other end talk. And why should he? The thought that someone else would use Sephiroth's cellphone was laughable.

"This is Ciara. He did come home first, Angeal. But he was wounded." I heard the stunned silence on the other end and hurried on before he could say anything. "Don't worry, I healed him, and he's resting it off. But... Angeal, remember what I told you? About... about me? I need to be certain about something before I act and to do that I need to examine another SOLDIER. So can you come to the house?" I asked it softly, not knowing if Sephiroth was listening in or not. Angeal was silent for a moment, then sighed.

"I'm still training, so I can't make it anytime soon. I've also got a mission lined up for me and the trainees so I can see how they work in the field. But..." He trailed off considering. Then he sighed heavily. "Alright. I'll meet up with you on my way out. The slum church where you made those flowers bloom; go there. I'll send one of the third class SOLDIERs to wait for you there and watch over you until I arrive. Can you do this examination quickly?" He asked, having just now thought of it. I told him it wouldn't take long and hung up. The thought of going back through that maintenance shaft wasn't thrilling, but... to be absolutely certain, I would.

Sighing, I tightened my hold on the blanket and look towards the stairs. He wasn't going to like my going out alone. He would want to go with me, for protection. But, at the same time, he drew more attention that I myself would alone. He was a double edged sword. I was safe with him but also in danger by his side. So I was going to have to convince him to not go with me when we both knew that my being in Midgar, alone, was terribly risky. The man was bullheaded; convincing him of this was not going to be easy.

"No time like the present." I muttered, letting the blanket slide to the floor as I stood and slowly mounted the stairs. At the top, I tiptoed to the bedroom and peeked in through the half open door. What I saw left my jaw on the floor and me incapable of any rational thought.

Sephiroth was asleep. I don't know how or why he fell into slumber so easily, but I praised Minerva that he had, since it would make my sneaking out so much easier. But... I couldn't move, frozen to the spot, because he wa truly and purely naked on top of that bed. His leather pants lay half on half off the side of his bed, the sheets a tangled mess underneath him.

He lay with one arm curled up around his head and the other loosely draped across his chest, stretching out his torso so I could see the definition of his chest and arms. My eyes trailed down his body to his strong thighs, but I gulped and yanked them back up, face flaming. Time to move, girl. I crept into the room softly, walking on the balls of my feet so as to make no sound. He had paper and a pen next to his bed, so I helped myself to some and scribbled out a quick note. I don't want him freaking out if he woke to find me gone or something. Facing the bed, I laid it on the pillow next to him.

His face was softer in slumber, the almost impossibly (definitely unfairly) long eyelashes brushing against his high cheeks while his sculpted jaw was not clenched as tightly. Nor was his brow furrowed like it often was during the day. He appeared younger, more peaceful, as he slept. Before I could stop myself, I reached out and trailed my fingers along his jaw, once again feeling that burn which came with touching him. There was a chance, now that I know what he carried in his body, that this reaction between us is caused by pure meeting corrupt. It is our bodies rejecting one another. But, even so, I couldn't resist the draw he held for me. My fingers traced upward, touching the bottom line of his thin lips, before I blinked, and drew away sharply. What am I, a pervert? How could I be drooling over him like this while he's sleeping?

Berating myself, I quietly backed out of the room and hurried to the backdoor. Sephiroth's back yard was fenced in by a sturdy, tall wooden fence, so I never felt in danger out here. And since we were on an upper plate, I could see the sky above and feel my connection to the planet. I'd spent hours out here in the past weeks while he was gone. But now I headed for the huge flowering bush in the back and got onto my knees, crawling into the heart of the branches. The maintenance exit was behind this frilly foliage. A good hiding spot but I still couldn't understand how Sephiroth, with his huge body and incredibly gorgeous hair, could use this exit. But, again, it matters not to me. Finding the hatch, I took a deep breath of clean air and then used the code Angeal had taught me to open it.

The stench wafted out instantly, even more overpowering than the last time I encountered it. Gagging, I pulled a handkerchief I'd found inside the house out of my pocket and tied it around my nose and mouth. It helped, but still... this place smelled worse than death and feces rotting in the sun together at the height of summer. Steeling myself, I climbed onto the ladder leading down to the walkway and started down, making sure I closed and sealed the door after me. Once inside I hurried across the walkway to the other side and exited.

I was more careful opening the door, though. Down here in the slums, I wasn't in much danger of being caught by Shin Ra Infantry or Turks, but all sorts of desperate people were here, and if I were caught coming out here, I could be beaten or killed as they stormed the vent in an attempt to get out of the slums.

The coast was clear, though, so I stepped out and locked up. The stench lingered in the air, though, clinging to my clothes. I know Angeal wouldn't mind, but his subordinate... I don't want Angeal to be considered a guy with dirty friends. I hurried into a small alcove nearby and pressed my back against the wall. The lifestream was distant, but still... I closed my eyes and reached out, calling a tiny lick of it to my person. The cool tendril coiled around my body, removing the stink and also chasing away my fatigue from healing Sephiroth earlier. That done, I stepped out of the alley and started walking towards the ruined church.

Since it is on the outskirts of Midgar, there were almost no people in the area surrounding the church usually. But when I came closer today, I sensed... my body stopped. There was no way it was possible, but I sensed a clean purity I hadn't felt since my mother died all those years ago. Heart in my throat, I picked up the pace and ran the open space between the church and the edge of the slum .

Standing in the sun amidst the flowers I had caused to bloom, watering them, was a young girl of maybe thirteen at most, long brown hair caught up in a curly tail that bounced as she moved with delicacy through the flowers. Tears pricked at my eyes as the girl turned, hearing my approach, and stared at me with large blue eyes. Ifalna! I opened my mouth, but no words came out. She looks just like my older sister, whom I had lost to the call of destiny many years ago. A youthful version of her, to be certain, but still Ifalna. My knees lost their strength and I fell, hitting the ground hard.

Little footsteps rushed to my side. "Are you alright? Do you hurt somewhere?" The clear, young voice was full of innocence as the girl grabbed my shoulder and tried to help me up. I sucked in a painful breath of air and centered myself as well I could, allowing the girl - my niece! - to help me stand. In her eyes I saw no recognition of who or what I was. There was much humanity in her, dulling her senses to the point that her abilities would be very muted, especially here in this stagnant city. She would, at most, be able to heal with materia to an uncanny degree and sense the passing of souls onto the planet. And... I swallowed hard. If Holy were ever again needed to be unleashed...

I shook my head. No. "Sorry, sweetie. I'm fine. It's just... you look like someone I used to know so I got a little start from seeing you." I said, smiling weakly at the girl and offering a hand. "I am called Ciara. What's your name?"

The girl shook my hand heartily. "I'm Aerith Gainsborough, and I'm thirteen. These pretty flowers started blooming here a few weeks ago, so I've been taking them home with me to help them grow better. I didn't know anyone else knew about this place?" She prattled on with childlike glee, skipping from topic to topic with ease. I smiled, despite myself. She is much like Ifalna...

"Gainsborough is a rather unusual name." I remarked quietly, swinging my feet a little as I stared at the sun pouring in on the flowers. They were healthy, I could feel that. And the lifestream was flowing closer to the surface than it had previously. This girl's presence was probably feeding them and keeping them alive, had called the lifestream close enough to allow for the flower's to permanently remain.

Next to me, Aerith grew silent. I glanced over and saw pain on her fair face. "Mother and I... we were held captive in that big building in the center of the city. When we escaped, Mother was... she became ill and died after that. I was left with Mrs. Gainsborough, taken in as her daughter. She keeps me safe from Shin Ra people and is raising me. I'm bringing her these flowers to make her happy. She hasn't really been happy since her husband died."

My heart broke within me. I had known, many years ago actually, that Ifalna was no longer alive. It had just hit me suddenly one day, an inescapable truth that I had been forced to accept. Ifalna was gone, had returned to the planet. The only one of my family left was me and this unknowing girl beside me. I brought my hand to my lips and bit my palm to stop my tears from falling. "Ifalna has died, then..." I whispered.

"You knew my Mother?" Aerith whispered, looking at me stunned. I smiled sadly. Oh, child... if only you knew. But, in my heart, I knew she could never know me. Not while I lived, anyways. To do so would be to put her in grave danger. I was known to Calamity. If that foul thing ever learned there was yet another who carried our blood, then she would be targeted and maybe killed. I looked at Aerith, those eyes so much like my sisters - like my own - and smiled.

"Yes, I knew Ifalna well. She... was a gentle woman." I reached up and tugged the ribbon from my hair, the materia falling into my lap. I stared at it, a sudden thought occurred to me. It made me sick in my stomach to consider doing this, but if darkness won this battle, if she gained control, then... I brought the materia to my lips and whispered a short prayer against the smooth surface, casting the start of the spell. What I whispered came from the depths of my heart, the part of me that normally only came out when I was inside the planet. Which each word, I was creating a terribly powerful burden to give to a child, but it was one I knew I had to. I felt it sink in, the materia become a pure, clear white unclouded by any other color or hue as the power feeding the spell, the planet's heart, also connected to my soul. Sephiroth's gift, what he had found in the Icicle Area... a gift from the hand of the one chosen as the vessel would become the key to protecting this planet. The painful irony was almost too much to bear. I held the materia out to Aerith.

"Here, child. This materia is from Ifalna. I have held onto to it for many, many years, hoping to return it, but now... I shall leave it in your hands. Protect it." I said, giving it to the child. She held it cautiously, treating the glass orb like a precious thing. She didn't even question me, though I felt horrible for lying. But... she would need that materia if I failed.

"What is this, Ciara?" She asked me, eyes wide.

"It's called Holy; the most sacred of all materia on Gaia and the one which can summon the power of Holy Minerva from the core of the planet to protect against Calamity and destruction. Long has it been held by the members of Ifalna's family. They were called Cetra, Ancients who protect Gaia, and you are among the last. So her burden falls to you. Can you do that, Aerith? If ever this world is threatened, can you summon Holy?" I asked her, watching those innocent eyes harden with resolve as she nodded. I leaned back against the pew we sat in and smiled. "Good. If ever you are scared or don't know what to do, Aerith, just close your eyes and pray. Your mother and ancestors are always watching over you." And so am I...

I stood and walked into the flower patch, kneeling among them. "One more thing... take care of these flowers?" I asked, cupping one delicate blossom in my hands. The girl bounced up and nodded, tucking the materia into her white dress as she joined me. We chatted for awhile longer, but then I sighed, seeing from the sky that the time for my meeting was coming closer. This girl... I want to keep her away from all Shin Ra, even Angeal, if at all possible. It would be marvelous if she were able to have a happy life. "Aerith, sweetie, I think it is time for you to return to Mrs. Gainsborough." I said, pointing to the sky. She squeaked and jumped to her feet, darting for one crumbling exit of the church. At the sagging entry, she faced me.

"Thanks for the present from Mother, Ciara! I'll look after the flowers for you!" She called, sending me a wave before running off. I stared after her for a long while, feeling the presence of Ifalna nearby. It wasn't censoring or angry, just... there.

"I'm sorry, sister... I just gave her a burden, a fate, almost as terrible as my own." I whispered, clenching my hands and staring down at my feet. I felt Ifalna's spiritual embrace and then she was gone, forgiving me for the horrible thing I had just done. Because we both knew that there was no other choice left. With my sister being gone and my fate being what it is, Aerith was the only one remaining who could do what was necessary. Sighing, I bent and plucked a flower, tucking it behind my ear as my unrestrained hair tumbled around me. A sound at the door had me turning.

A young boy with pitch black hair and happy, open blue eyes was walking towards me, dressed in the training uniform of Shin Ra. My mouth fell open when he got closer. He froze as well, recognizing me. I pointed at him. "You're that Zack brat from Gongaga!" I shrieked.

"And you're the creepy vegetable seller!" He shot back, seemingly stunned. If I wasn't so depressed I would have laughed. This boy has such a beautifully pure soul and bright way of viewing life, a rare quality today. In him I saw the strength and hope that would bring about an end to darkness. After flapping his lips for a long moment, he finally gained back his voice and crossed his arms, glowering at me.

"But.. but Angeal told me I was coming to meet a very close friend of Sephiroth's and that I had to be on my best behavior. You know Sephiroth?" He asked, apparently not believing what his eyes were telling him. I sighed and rubbed the bridge of my nose. Zack Fair from Gongaga was many things, but intelligent was not high on his list of qualities. Ernest, good hearted, pure, quick, exceptionally strong, and loyal, all up there. Smarts... not so much. He wasn't stupid as much as.. thick.

"Yes, I know Sephiroth." I muttered. He threw his arms up and then planted them firmly on his hips, trying to stare me down. Which didn't work, seeing as I am taller than him a good deal.

"I don't believe this! You never told me." He said, looking extremely put out in the way only children can. Which reminded me... he was so young, only thirteen himself. Why would he be training to become a killer while so young? "You know how much I idolize the SOLDIERs and yet you never let on you knew the most famous one! He's a hero! Why, you could've put in a good word for me with them!"

I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye then sighed and swung around, walking over to the pew where I had sat with Aerith moments earlier. I felt his gaze boring into my back, so I patted the bench next to me in invitation. He wasn't shy, and I knew the allure of my friendship with his idols would be enough. After hesitating, he came over and sat next to me.

"I wasn't exactly welcome in Gongaga, Zack, not to mention it was none of your business who I was acquainted with." I reminded him, holding a hand up when he tried to speak. "I did, however, tell Sephiroth a little about you, so you never know. You may get to met your hero one day, maybe even become one yourself." I meant the words to encourage him, and they did, causing his eyes to go bright with joy, but as I spoke them, the planet whispered to me.

I saw him weeping here in this church, I saw him laughing, I felt the pain of what he was being forced to do eating away at him, and through it all, I saw him struggle and succeed to retain his honor and his soul. I saw him become the true hero, even as his existence and name faded from memory from the one - the knowledge slammed shut and I winced at the lance of pain it sent through my head. Sometimes, when the planet is certain of a fate, and does not want it changed, the knowledge will be shut off from me so I cannot in any way affect it. Whoever Zack cared about enough to risk his very life for was important to the planet's plans. And I could not touch that life at all.

"Especially if you hang around her all that often." We both turned around at the same time as Angeal came striding in, breaking into my confusing thoughts. "Thank you for meeting her here, Zack. This won't take long, so you can go wait by the entrance." He said. The boy blew out a breath but jumped to his feet when the older man just leveled a look at him. Even though his face remained stern, I could feel Angeal's love and pride at this boy bubbling in his chest.

"Whaaaatever. See ya later, vegetable girl." He called out, waving as he went to follow Angeal's orders and wait by the entrance, just out of earshot but still in sight. He would be one that a mentor needed to watch closely. I slid over on the bench, giving Angeal room to sit beside me. He did and we both were silent for a long moment, then he sighed and looked at me.

"Ciara, I confess to doing some digging after what you told me last time. One of the scientists at Shin Ra was actually researching your people, the Ancients. Seems at some point he found a living one, with a child, up in the Icicle Area. When he refused to hand them over for study, he was killed and the mother and child taken into Shin Ra custody. Though they have since escaped, the daughter, who is the only one living now, is under constant surveillance. Shin Ra is far too interested in the Ancients. I wanted to let you know you aren't alone, but also that you you have to be careful. If they found out about you... it would bring you nothing but sorrow." He said.

I smiled at him. Angeal is a good man. I could feel his strong soul struggling with whether or not he should tell me this, not knowing that I had already met Aerith or even that she was related to me. The thought never occurred to him. But he just wanted me to know that I wasn't alone. I could feel his conflict and kindness, the concern he held for me, his sorrow at having to teach a young boy like Zack to kill, all of it. Reaching out, I grabbed one of his hands in both of mine. His issues were his own and I could not face them for him; each man's fate is there own and cannot be born by another. But I could do as my people have done for ages and give guidance, add strength and support to a searching soul.

"To have life is to have sorrows, but to live is to overcome them all when faced with adversity in order to grasp the true desire of your heart." I giggled when I finished the rather formal words the elder has always spoken and shrugged. "Or something like that. Thank you for sharing with me, Angeal. But please... do not do anymore research. If you seem to interested in this material, me and the orphaned girl may be in danger. It's sad enough already that she will never live a life free of Shin Ra." I felt my throat clench, but shook it off. I had marked her for a hard life when I had given her the Holy materia earlier; it did not matter if she was known to Shin Ra or not at that point. The only difference it made was that her life was never going to be easy. "I'm gonna examine you now. Let me know if I hurt you, though you may have to shout to make me react. I tend to zone out while doing this." When Angeal nodded I allowed my eyes to drift close and then sent my mind out, diving into the complexity of thoughts, feelings, and emotions that was a SOLDIER.

Right away I saw the corruption, the same darkness which lived inside Sephiroth. But, inside of Angeal, it wasn't as pervasive. The evil was there, to be certain, and I could even seen genetic degradation starting on some level, but not in the concentration and not to the extent that it was inside Sephiroth. My stomach churned as I looked around. It was obvious to me now that the Mako infusions were not what made the 1st class SOLDIERs so strong, though that is what the company proclaimed to the general public about the program. Those infusions were just supplements to the grotesque experimentation that had been done on them. Judging from the levels of genetic integration of corruption, this had started probably around gestation for both Angeal and Sephiroth. Shin Ra was taking the evil of Calamity and putting it inside good people, making them puppets that could be used by her if she grew any stronger. But only Sephiroth had enough to be completely and totally integrated with the corruption, without any flaws or defections... only him. Which meant...

I pulled back into my own body and bent double, air barely able to draw properly into my lungs as my mind tried to absorb the painful knowledge that Sephiroth, the man I cared for and my friend, was not human, had never gotten the chance to be human. Angeal put his hand on my shoulder and called my name, but I waved him off and curled tighter into myself, tears burning at the corner of my eyes. Angeal was going to die soon, maybe in the next five years or so. The mutation and destruction that had made him would eventually end up killing him. I would wager that the same could be said for Genesis, though they're might be a chance to save them if someone were to study the actual mutation process which was causing the slight degradation I could see inside Angeal. But Sephiroth... he had no degradation in his body. As a matter of fact, he was a factory for growing more of the corruption. He body drew in dark mako like regular bodies drew in lifestream and converted it into some poisonous substance that carried shades of Calamities darkness inside. If he bled, he would spread that darkness. If he cried. Anything from his body would carry a taint. He was a perfect vessel for Calamity, monstrously strong and yet spreading her vile evil just by existing. Just like her. Now that I knew, could I allow him to live? His very life threatened Gaia and eventually he would have to succumb to the darkness living within him or else perish and yet... I can't. I can't destroy him.

"Mother Gaia, why do you make this my fate?" I choked out, clenching my hands into fists and trying to swallow back the sorrow rising within me. Tears started dripping down my face as I panted, trying to hold the feelings in. My emotions can be dangerous if not contained. Just as my laughter and joy created flowers, so did my sorrow destroy them, as the planet reacted to whatever emotion was strongest in my heart. That was why I always tried to maintain a peaceful state of mind, to lessen the chance that I may cause harm to not only the people but also the planet. But here, in this city of death and pain, where the screams of the tormented choked me and there was no chance for my mind to touch the beauty of the planet's core, that harmony was already dangerously upset. Through sheer willpower I had been maintaining equilibrium but now that will was broken. I was broken.


	4. Chapter 4

I heard Angeal shouting my name, but didn't pay him any mind, staring straight at the flowers in front of me. Aerith's flowers, now. As I watched I saw them curling a little away from me, their petals losing the vibrancy that made them so beautiful. My pain was causing them to wither. If this pain grew any stronger, I could harm Angeal or his boy. And that was something I could never do. Gasping, I jumped to my feet and turned, running past the concerned Angeal and the stunned Zack, dashing across the empty space until I hit the slums and was swallowed by the crowd. If I didn't use the people as a shield, those two warriors would catch me. I'm fast, but I'm not a SOLDIER. I focused my mind on escaping, the only thought able to break through the sea of emotions inside me that of getting out under the open sky.

The feelings and desires of the slum residents pressed against me. My mental shields, the natural barriers that protected me from the bombardment of emotion while among people, were gone, stripped away by my own uncontrollable feelings. If I stayed here I would go mad, unable to cope with feeling all those thoughts and wishes. I turned and started running as fast as my legs would carry me towards the exit. I bumped into people but offered no apology, just ran until the crowd started to clear in front of me. The people gave the crazy woman with the wild hair and damp eyes a wide berth. Living in this city meant they knew to recognize the dangers and avoid them. And right now, I was terribly dangerous.

Finally I made it outside of Midgar, but I didn't stop running, my legs carrying me out into the vast field surrounding the mechanical city. My heart was driving me forward, trying to outrun the knowledge of the destiny awaiting me, trying to physically push out the pain and grief threatening to swallow me whole. My feet kept carrying me onward, lungs burning and strained. Panic had built in my chest, the pain was overwhelming me, and I needed... I had to get somewhere pure, somewhere clean where I could breath and think. Gasping for breath, I turned my face towards the distant mountains and took a step.

"Ciara!" A hard hand shackled my wrist as my name was shouted. The panic in me spiraled out of control and I swung out, fingers curled to scratch the person who was holding me. My other hand was caught and that was it. I closed my eyes and screamed until my voice was raw. "Ciara, it's me." Breathing heavily I mutely shook my head and twisted against the person holding me. I felt anger burning in him, though it wasn't directed at me. Mutely I tried to pull free, though my escape attempts were weakening. The person sighed and turned to someone nearby, the other person's concern brushing against my mind soothingly. It was a pure, honest feeling, able to reach through the chaos in my mind and start to help me gather myself again.

"Here, take my phone. Call five; if he answers, let him know that somethings wrong with Ciara. If he doesn't answer, leave a message. Tell him that Angeal is taking Ciara somewhere safer because something is wrong, and that you will wait for him at HQ to fill him in and give directions. I'll call with my other phone once I get her... helped. Wait at HQ. Say nothing to anyone, except him." There was a slight scurry of sound and then the concerned person ran off. "Ciara, tell me what you need."

My mind was beginning to settle a little, freed from the metal cage of stagnant life in Midgar. "The mountains. I have... the mountains." I whispered, ripping one of my hands free from the stranglehold the man had on me to clutch at my chest. My heart was going to burst if I didn't get to pure lifestream soon and immerse myself in it to meditate. Pain accumulates inside of my people and if we get too much at once, the delicate balance we maintain shatters, making us ill. Sometimes we die from this sudden flood of negative emotion. Opening my eyes, I forced my mind to focus. Angeal looked down at me, his concern written all over his face. "Near the Nibel Area, in the mountains, there is a peak near a cave that is surrounded on all sides by rock. I need to be there. Only a chocobo..." I whispered, hardly able to speak with my voice raw and ruined from my screaming earlier.

"I... am sorry to say this, but as a child I had no money and therefore could not really afford to train a chocobo. I don't have one." Angeal said, glancing off in the distance with some distaste. "Nor am I an expert on riding or taming them, since I always use helicopters and transport cars like a normal person."

"I have one. Gershal greens. In my pocket." Again I whispered. Angeal blinked at me, but then nodded, letting me go. I instantly fell to the ground, unable to stand any longer. He looked alarmed, but then sighed and knelt beside me, muttering an apology as he shoved his hands into the pockets on my dress until he found what he wanted. He threw the pungent greens into the air and in moments I heard the loud 'kweeh!' of my chocobo.

Angeal sucked in a breath as my beautiful bird flew up. Most people thought golden chocobo nothing more than a myth, a legend created by nomads in ancient times to amuse themselves with their ordinary birds. But my bird was golden. I'd found it shortly after my villages was destroyed and I had started living on my own. Since then, the two of us have been inseparable. The bird landed and bent over, nudging me with it's beak as it let out a squawk of concern.

Lifting my arms, I sank my fingers into his shimmering feathers. The bird knelt so it wasn't towering over me and I painfully pulled myself onto his back, weaving a little when he stood. I glanced down at Angeal and opened my mouth to say something, anything, to get that anger out of him - I could sense now that it was directed at himself, though I don't exactly understand why. It wouldn't go him any good to keep that inside, and my personal desire to help momentarily drove out the agony I was in.

His phone rang, startling both of us. Flipping it open, he pressed it to his ear. "Yes?" He asked, shortly. I watched his face closely and saw the alarm growing on it. "Say what? N-no I have no idea. The Turks have been sent out!? I'm just outside Midgar; I'll meet them there. Send the trainees out with them so they don't get lost on the way." He hung up and looked up at me, face pale.

"The reactors acted up, in response to a strange surge in energy traced to the slum church three minutes ago. Upon further investigation, witnesses saw a woman with blonde hair fleeing the scene at around the same time. We've been ordered to find and capture her for the Research and Development team to find out how she was able to influence the reactors." He stated the information calmly, even as his eyes betrayed his agitation. "I'm to gather my trainees and lead the search on the ground while the Turks take the air."

I rested my cheek on the chocobo's neck, lightly running my fingers along the feathers. "It's alright, Angeal. I've been in Midgar for two months now; I was bound to be discovered sooner or later. I'm only sorry this puts you in conflict. I'll go now. And maybe someday I'll see you again." He reached out and grabbed my hand, smiling at me.

"Stay safe, Ciara. I know we will meet again, even if I have to grow wings and fly to see you. Nothing is beyond a SOLDIER." It was said jokingly, but the sentiment behind the words was true, I could tell, and my heart ached for him. He glanced back towards the entrance. "You'll want to fly as high as you can, to avoid the helicopters. The Turks are rather diligent, though Veld is questionable. I doubt that Sephiroth has been called in on so trifle a mission." It was a warning and advice all rolled into one. I squeezed his hand to let him know I understood and dug my knees into my chocobo. With a soft kweeh the bird jumped up and started flapping, carrying both of us high into the air.

"To my sanctuary, Choco." I whispered in his ear, still fighting off the waves of sorrow threatening to choke me. I was not able to steer my bird, but he's a good boy. He instantly turned West, towards the water, and flew swiftly. On land, chocobos speed cannot be matched by any living creature. In the air, they're slower, but still, he can make some serious time. I just had to hold on and wait.

When we were pretty far out over the waters between the Corel Area and the Midgar Area, I heard the choppers. Holding on to Choco, I twisted around to look behind me. The outline of the shore was barely visible but the dark specks over it were getting larger. Had they found me already? How? Angeal wouldn't have told them anything and no one would suspect an fugitive to be in the air on a mythical golden chocobo! I didn't think they actually had me in sight, though, because the formation behind me was broad, one formed to cover the most amount of space. But why were they doing a sweep over the ocean? Did they fear that I would try to swim to get away?

Biting my lip, I turned to face the front again, seeing Corel Area coast close by. Though I didn't want to go anywhere near people while I was still unbalanced, I didn't want to risk leading the Shin Ra company to my sanctuary. I leaned up against Choco's neck.

"Change of plans, old boy. Costa Del Sol, on the double." I whispered in his ear. He tossed his head and banked, changing course for the popular resort town. We landed in a forest near the outskirts, and I slid off Choco, who clucked at my worriedly. Chocobos are much smarter than most people give them credit for; they can sense things, and Choco knew I wasn't alright. But I just stroked my fingers along his beak. "Be prepared to fly outta here fast if you have to, Choco, okay?" I told him, giving him some more Greshal greens before heading out of the woods and into Costa Del Sol.

It actually wasn't as crowded as I feared, but still full of plenty of people so I was able to quickly lose myself among them. As it was autumn now, the chill in the air has driven some of the fair weather chasers here, but peak season wouldn't hit until true winter fell on Midgar. Even so, there were enough people here to give me some problems what with their emotions pounding against me. I paid my fee for entering the village and walked around aimlessly, slipping my boots off so my bare feet came in contact with the earth beneath me. Touching Gaia helped to ground me, started to balance the twisted shape my mind was in.

I walked to the beach, the hot sand under my soles comforting. Though most people around me were in swim gear, there were a couple other people out here in light clothes like mine, so I didn't stand out too awfully much. Heading to the water's edge, I went out deep enough for the salty sea to lick at my calves and then started pacing up the length of the beach, head bent like I was scoping for shells.

Though it wasn't as good as what I had planned to do, the sea was helping to calm my mind, soothe my ragged heart. The gentle ebb and flow of water drew the sorrow out of me and into the planet, where it would be handled and returned as a stronger power. The sound of sand under sea calmed my labored breathing while the sea air soothed my ragged throat. I could still feel too much - I was getting emotions from the people on the shore more than I wanted to - but I wasn't in danger of breaking open any longer. This fix wasn't perfect, but at least I was able to think again a little.

What was I to do? My feet stopped and I bent, digging at the edge of a white shell sticking out of the sand. Sephiroth was Calamity's child, had been made into a perfect vessel for her wicked deeds from his would be no changing that, not now that I knew how pervasive the darkness was in him. The only way for him to escape that fate would be to die while he was still himself. I can't kill him, though. Not only will my personal feelings get in the way, but his strength will not allow for someone like me to deny him life. Only another SOLDIER 1st class has hope of that, though I refuse to make those friends fight each other. My only option then... but, he's such a strong person that he won't just die without a fight, if he were aware of the situation. And could I even bear to tell him? He didn't know about his birth, about what kind of people had twisted his life into this hellish fate. He'd told me once in a letter that he grew up in the Shin Ra labs, never knowing who his parents were. He only knew of his mother's name, Jenova. Even I don't know the truth about his past. What kind of mother gives up her child to heinous experiments? What kind of father would let it happen?

I'm so sorry... The voice whispered on the wind, but I knew only I heard it. The planet had allowed me to glimpse someone's pain, though I know not why. Agony whispered along those three words, until I wanted to weep. I can't deal with this now. Sighing, I drew my shields around my mind again, blocking the woman's voice out.

"I don't think I'm the one you need to apologize to anyway, lady..." I muttered, shaking my head to get the last traces of her sorrow out of my head, since I have enough of my own to deal with right now.

I was startled out of my thoughts by a shadow hanging over me. I jerked my head up and stared hard at the handsome man with pure dark hair pulled back from an astute face watching me. "The sea is cold, this time of year." He finally said, offering me a hand. With my shields up all the way, I am not able to read people the way I normally do, but I can still sense auras. And this man has a clean one, despite the violence I could see in his eyes. I accepted his hand and allowed him to pull me to my feet. "I'm Tseng." He said, letting me go.

"Ciara." I answered shortly, staring out at the sun sparkling on the water. "When I stand beside the sea and realize how small I truly am, I can't help but wonder what my place on this planet is." I didn't realize I had spoken aloud until Tseng stood crossed his arms against the small of his back and stood staring out beside me, and answered me.

"It is our lot in life to have to struggle to find that place. Though your path is probably clearer than any regular persons, is it not, friend of the Cetra?" I whirled at his words, hand flying to my throat. Looking at him now, seeing the suit and the impeccable manner of dress... Turk. This guy was a Turk. He held up a hand and stepped away from me. "Relax. I am on leave. The last mission I was on led to an entire town being bombed, so Veld handed me a week long vacation pass to Costa Del Sol and told me to get out of Midgar. I was on my way out when I decided to do one last check on the Cetra girl Aerith. I saw you talking to her and left."

So he was one of the people watching that girl. I hadn't sensed him at all, though to be honest, my shock at finding another with my people's blood had probably compromised my ability. Well, even then, this man was impressive, since I hadn't sensed him sneaking up on me earlier either. Then I noticed the white sling under his jacket holding his arm, and the bandages wrapped around his head, and felt my eyes widen. He wasn't on leave; he was recovering from serious injuries. I lowered my hand, fighting the urge to relieve his pain.

"Just because a person can hear the voice of the planet does not mean that they can understand their purpose for living." I said, turning and slowly starting to walk up and down the beach again. "I'm still trying to find mine. It's not easy for any person."

Tseng kept pace with me, nodding his head. We both looked up when one of the Shin Ra helicopters flew overhead and kept heading West. I wanted to duck and hide, but even if they spotted a blonde girl from up there, they probably wouldn't land... would they? "Are you running from Shin Ra?" Tseng asked me suddenly, making me stare at him, bug eyed, again. If this man ever went up in rank among the Turks, those brutes might actually get some stuff done! He was sharp... insightful and blunt. I met his gaze steadily.

"Yes."

"Then I will not give you away to them." He turned and started walking back towards the town, leaving me no choice but to scurry after him. "I know that Shin Ra has done awful things; a whole town was wiped out and then replaced because of them. Whatever your reasons for running are, I won't stop you. It is like with the Cetra girl. I watch her, talk to her about her options, but that is all." Another good man, doing what he can to try to stop the wrong he knows is being committed in this world.

I suddenly saw, in flash, images of this man standing before me and what events would befall him in the future. I saw the pain and the suffering, but what made me want to cry the most... was the box of letters I saw him holding in his hands one day. And I didn't know why. Shaking the vision off, I wiped the wet sand off my feet and slipped them back into my boots as we gained the street.

Without pausing, Tseng went up to a hotdog vender and bought two, handing me one and turning to a bench looking out over the square. I seated myself and started to eat, not having realized how hungry I actually was. My emotional balance was getting better. Food, the sea, the air, open sky... it was all helping. But I still needed to get to the mountains. More than that, I need one person to be with me. It defines all logic, but I'm not gonna fight it. I sighed and looked at Tseng.

"Turk phones, are they untraceable?" I asked suddenly. He was chewing, so he just nodded and handed his to me without question. I shouldn't really trust this guy, but I do. Maybe because he reminds me a little of my father, back when he was still alive. I tried to picture Tseng blonde and couldn't, just managing to crack myself up. Still, I do believe him. So I flipped open the phone and punched in a number I had memorized long ago, hoping the man on the other end would answer and not be angry.

"Yes." I shivered at the cold emanating from his voice, but started talking.

"Hey, um... can you possibly happen to suddenly take a vacation? Get an urge to see the sea?" I asked, knowing he would understand. There was a long silence on the other end of the phone, then a soft sigh.

"Stay there." Sephiroth ordered, hanging up on me. I pulled the phone away from my ear and stuck my tongue out at it.

"Rude..." I muttered, snapping it shut and giving it back to Tseng. Then I propped my chin on my hand and smiled as brightly as I could at him. "I know it's terribly uncouth of me to ask this of a man recovering from injury on paid leave, but can you, ya know, scat for the next hour and then pretend you never met me?" I asked. He stood up.

"Naturally. Is your ride coming to get you?" He asked. I giggled a little.

"Actually, I'm his ride, but he doesn't know that now. Thank you, Tseng, for helping me out." I told him, brushing my fingers against his sleeve. It wasn't much but... I could give him some extra luck. Who knows, it might come in handy one day. He looked a little startled at my gratitude, but then nodded his head and bowed, walking away from me without a backwards glance.

I wished him well and finished my food, then headed back to the beach. There were fewer people out here now, since it was growing hot with the sun beating down so powerfully, but I just found myself an umbrella and opened it, plopping my bum down on the sand shaded beneath it and watching the waves roll in and out.

Under the shade I just let my mind wonder and didn't try to think of anything. Not a solution to my problems or even a course of action. I just sat. It is strange, really, for me to be doing nothing. My entire life, I've had a huge motive. Don't get found out, don't get killed, don't get caught, don't let anyone find out about your bloodlines, don't fight your destiny... but now, that was all washing away with the tide. Because my life was in shambles, I didn't have to worry about what I had to make sure didn't happen. All I had to do at this moment was breath. Live. Be Ciara. Leaning back, I smiled and closed my eyes, drawing in a deep breath.

"So this is the calm before the storm, yeah?" I whispered, falling onto my back and staring up at the umbrella above me. There was no doubt in my mind that eventually, something would happen which would cause Sephiroth to lose his cool, make him let go of his strong will for just a moment, and when that happened, Calamity would creep in and seize control. Once that happened... fire, pain, death, sorrow, torment, it would all follow. But also, as Sephiroth fell into darkness, so would I. I would be the light hidden at the bottom of despair. Because that was the role I had to play. The goddess descends from the sky, wings of light and dark spread afar, she guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting. A giggle bubbled up in my throat. Genesis must be rubbing off on me. Though I hadn't met with him again since he left with Sephiroth months ago, he leaves a lasting impression.

I doubt he truly knew what he was doing, quoting Loveless to me, reciting the lines. I doubt anyone really remembered where that poem came from, or how the play came to enact the lives of three important figures. But, I guess in the end it doesn't matter. All the players have a part and will leave the stage when their last line is given. Or something like that. Trying to be poetic in my thoughts leaves me with a pounding headache.

The soft sound of heavy feet on sand caught my attention. Instead of getting up, I tilted my head back as far as I could so I was viewing the world behind me upside down. Those boots coming towards me... in my heart, I felt some of the last of my panic fading. "Hey. Feeling better?" I asked, flipping over onto my stomach and waiting as he bent so he could see me under the umbrella and offer me a hand, which I started to take. Then I blinked. He wasn't wearing his trench coat... in fact... "You own a shirt?" I asked, stunned.

Sephiroth sent me a look and snagged my hand, pulling me out from under the shade. Not only was he wearing a shirt, but a form fitting one at that. Still long sleeved and black, but having his chest hidden by clingy fabric was almost worse than having it peeking out at me from the confines of his regular attire. Pushing my mouth shut, I saw he was watching me closely and gave him a soft smile.

"I probably look horrible. Been crying. I'm still not a hundred percent, but I'm better than I was. Sorry if I worried you." I said, keeping pace by his side. It was interesting. Normally when taken out of their combat clothes, military men can kind of fit in with the people around them, but not Sephiroth. Even in civilian-esque clothing, he stood out. People backed away from him and stared in awed fear. Maybe it was that fact that his silver hair was a well known trait of his? Or the mako eyes? The sheer presence? Doesn't really matter. Whatever it is about him that makes people uneasy is just part of the whole package for me. He is who is is, and I would never try to make him change that.

"Is it my fault?" Sephiroth asked as we slowly walked through the village together, side by side but not touch or clinging to each other like all the other couples we saw were. Even so, I felt safe with him. I knew, even though he appeared completely relaxed beside me, that he was keeping an eye on everything going on. "Ciara." I sighed. Guess I wasn't going to be able to avoid this conversation, though I wished with all my might that I could. It is terribly hard for me to lie, but in this case, telling the truth would be even worse. So I guess a mix of both is the best I can do.

"No, not yours. Not even mine. The fault lies with someone who I cannot even begin to assume I understand." That much is true. Who would do such a thing to him? Someone insane? Drawing in a deep breath, I spun so I was walking backwards, facing him. "I'm dangerously unbalanced right now and I have to go somewhere remote to recover. Wherever you need to be I can drop you off, I just wanted to let you know before I up and vanished so -"

"I'm coming with you." He said it like it was the most obvious and non negotiable thing in the world. My mouth flopped open again, but I quickly shut it and put my hands on my hips, glaring at him.

"Look, I appreciate the thought and all, but need I remind you that I'm a very tough adult woman and I don't need a SOLDIER haunting my footsteps. Not to mention, you have a job to do in Midgar. President Shin Ra, ring any bells?" I waved my hand at him, but he just grabbed my wrist and pulled me along behind him, quickly leaving the village and heading straight for the forest I had left Choco in. I dug in my heels and yanked my hand free, crossing my arms across my chest and waiting. After a few more steps, he turned and met my gaze evenly.

"Why?! You've never needed to be with me before? Hell, Sephiroth, we've been separated more than we've been together for six years." The way I phrased that made it seem like we were in a relationship... I tilted my head down to hide the heat invading my face.

He turned and faced the east, the direction in which Midgar lied. "For awhile now, I have had a feeling of something being wrong. I may not have your exact gifts, Ciara, but I can read the signs. Towns being obliterated, an endless war, monsters springing up with greater frequency, they are all torrents of something. Professor Gast told me, when I was younger, that the planet cries as darkness rises. Now the planet weeps. When that darkness finally comes... I wonder who will be left standing?"

Sephiroth's eyes, when he faced me again, were so sad, almost like he knew. Looking into those beautiful, terrifying eyes, I felt in my soul that he was aware of something getting ready to change irrevocably, and that the change would affect him. And I also knew... my time was almost up. If he left me now... I would never see him again. My destiny would claim me. I clenched my hands tightly. "It won't be me. Despite what Genesis says, I am no hero, and I will never last a fall." It was a struggle for me to speak, but I knew I had to.

"So... you're gonna stay with me? But you can't. Sephiroth, you're... you're Sephiroth! You are the face of SOLDIER,the militant arm of Shin Ra. You can't just up and disappear. But I can; I have to. It's how I survive." I said, storming up to him. There were tears in my eyes again, but I didn't let them fall. "I know you take pride in what you do and who you are and I won't let you throw all that away on a spooky feeling." Not even for me. It's best for you to be with Genesis and Angeal... because soon all of that will be ripped from you forcibly, leaving a gaping wound that will never heal. I suspect that the betrayal coming for him will be what weakens him enough to allow for the Calamity to take control.

He just looked at me. "I cannot ever stop being what I am. And I won't give up my job; it's all I'm good for. I can, however, take a brief leave. The President, after hearing about my injury in the last mission, told me to. So for now, Ciara, I will stay where you are." A small smirk tilted up the corner of his mouth. "Besides, you get into trouble when left on your own."

I harumphed and shoved by him stalking towards the forest angrily, but inside, I was a little happy. Out of all the people he could have chosen to be with now, he picked me. Our time was coming to an end, I knew that, but... just a little longer. I silently sent that prayer to my ancestors for strength and forgiveness and gave Sephiroth a mocking look.

"Me, get into trouble? I think that's rich, coming from the boy who ended getting shot on his first mission." I pointed out, putting my fingers to my lips and whistling. Choco bolted out of the forest and ran up to me, rubbing his face against my chest. He then stood as tall as he could and stared coldly at Sephiroth. Choco does not like males. However, Sephiroth didn't even blink at being given the one over by a chocobo (and a golden one at that) and instead just lifted an eyebrow. I giggled. "You're the one who picked to come with me. I fly the way nature intended humans to; using animal power. So... coming, city boy?" I asked, jumping up onto Choco's back.

Sephiroth didn't answer, just leapt up onto the bird behind me with an agility and familiarity which surprised me. I wouldn't think that someone as high ranking as him, who had grown up in the science laden world of Shin Ra, would know what to do with a chocobo. But, then again, this man would never want to be at a disadvantage. He probably taught himself to ride one. Laughing at the mental image that brought up, I leaned forward and whispered out destination to Choco, who squawked and then took to the air. Sephiroth slid an arm around my waist and held on as we flew off into the sky.

-Note: Sorry, this chapter is extremely short...-


	5. Chapter 5

-Note: There is some mature content in this chapter! Some sex, actually. So if that isn't your thing, then, um... maybe skip the middle? Read just the beginning and the end? For everyone else, please enjoy!-

0011, Mountains, Nibel Area

"Though none of us knew it at the time, when Ciara left Midgar was the beginning of the end for all of us. I saw her again only once, towards the end of my life. I had to watch her die. As for Genesis, I do not know if he ever saw her again before he left Shin Ra. He never told me. We agreed to never speak of her after she fled by silent consent. It was partly to protect her, since Shin Ra remained on the look out for her. Periodically we would receive reports of strange energy spikes and go investigate, hoping we wouldn't find Ciara there. We had all loved her in our own way and the purity of her memory was something we cherished as the world became darker. As for Sephiroth... The time he spent with Ciara were probably the last bit of happiness he ever knew. From the end of 1998 to 0000 he split his time between Midgar and the mountains. Ciara stopped traveling around Gaia and stayed there, living her life in private, probably aware her destiny was coming for her and wanting a few more precious memories to hold with her. Sephiroth told no one of this arrangement; I only found out years later, accidentally. I thought she was still roaming the planet and sending Sephiroth letters. In the few private talks we had before the rise of darkness in Gaia, he mentioned that he planned to find a way to protect Ciara so she could live her life openly without fear of Shin Ra. With him, though he never put that into so many words. He just had dreams and thoughts and during this time he was at his most human. He smiled and laughed, as much as he ever could. But that didn't last. When he came back to Shin Ra at the beginning of 0000, a culmination of events rolled in, that would eventually stop him from ever making it back to the mountains to see her again. Events which led to their eventual destruction." Yuffie finished reading and put the paper down slowly.

The information being given to the party of people now gathered around a crackling fire was almost too much for them to take. In this section of memories they had gotten the proof of what they all thought to be true. "So... Ciara really was a Cetra, an Ancient just like her." Yuffie said at last, staring pensively into the flames. "But... I still don't understand! She has so much power. She healed a person without using a materia. She can see the future! She can even sense from people's auras if they are good or bad. So how, how did all the terrible things still happen?" A single tear tracked down her face. Vincent reached out and absently brushed it away before facing the rest of the group, apparently not noticing he had stunned the girl into silence.

"She had a fate she could not avoid, one she knew would take her life." He said, reaching up and brushing his thick hair back so his red eyes were visible in the firelight. "Ciara gave her the Holy Materia."

Tifa sighed. "So it appears. She apparently touched more lives than we know of. I mean, she met her and gave her the materia she would use to save us from Meteore. Then she met Zack of all people. Genesis, Angeal... Reeve, she knew Tseng too. Would he be able to clarify anything?" The black eyed woman spoke to the man in the blue uniform sitting across the fire from her. He shook his head and sighed.

"That man hardly ever opens his mouth. Plus, he keeps most of his thoughts to himself, and was asked to forget he ever saw her. He won't say anything. I am intrigued by this view of Sephiroth, though. It doesn't seem like him - though Lazard once told me that the man had a wicked sense of humor once you got to know him. I never got the chance to, being head of a different department. Whenever I spoke with him it was usually briefly at meetings where he was guarding the president." Reeve stroked his chin thoughtfully.

They were all silent a moment. In their minds was the image of the monster who had destroyed lives and killed one of their own. They could only envision that man without emotions, a man who slaughtered and manipulated hundreds and thousands of people all for his demented and twisted desire. This image Angeal's words were painting was almost impossible for them to understand. A man who cared for the safety and well being of another person enough to sacrifice himself would not do the atrocities that Sephiroth committed. Nor would a man who could joke around and make wise cracks stare without a single flicker of remorse over the bodies of murdered people. But yet, that was what was happening.

Beside Tifa, Cloud stirred. "I remember... when we were on the way to Nibelheim, it was the first time I ever actually met Sephiroth. He was concerned for me because of my motion sickness. And interested in me. He spoke kindly, though afterwards Zack told me that he had been acting strange since earlier that day." The blond spoke slowly, as if the memory was hard to capture. Even after all these years, his mako poisoning still affected his memories sometimes. He had his true self back and knew which memories belonged to him and which belonged to Zack, but still, having both did cause some problems. Not to mention he was susceptible to illnesses born in the lifestream in a way regular people were not, and sometimes able to see visions of things past in his mind. The people around him knew better than to question his words, though.

"Well, I guess. Ciara does say that Sephiroth's strong will is all that is keeping him from Jenova's control. Eventually something will happen which breaks his control, and then he becomes a puppet for that vile thing to use and control. I guess? Still, even with your words, it's hard to see that man as anything but a monster." Tifa said, flipping her hair back and then resting her head on Cloud's shoulder. The blonde didn't say anything more but put his arm around her trim waist, letting her lean on him.

The huge red beast laying with his head in Yuffie's lap spoke up, the gentlemanly tone a sharp contrast to his fangs and claws. "I have no trouble seeing Sephiroth as a kind person before Jenova. We know already that he was close friends with Angeal and Genesis, and even Zack. He had a capacity for that inside of him, was actually a rather decent person, until what Ciara called Corruption destroyed it. I find it interesting, though, that the girl fell in love with a man she hardly knew." He said, tilting his head so Yuffie's scratching fingers would hit on just the right spot.

Barrett nodded. "Yeah! I mean, they didn't know each other a'tall." He burst out, loud voice echoing around the silent night surrounding them. Vincent sighed and started shifting papers around, pulling out the next stack.

"That isn't entirely true. These two wrote each other all the time. They probably felt more comfortable with one another than to anyone else. Sephiroth especially more than likely felt that she would understand him. Why else harm himself to keep her secrets safe? Though it it is hard to understand or define love, Ciara did not deny her own heart despite the knowledge she carried of the future awaiting the planet. Despite the fate she knew was waiting for the man she loved." It was the most the man had spoken in a long while, but his words were important. He knew more about loving despite the circumstances than most of them. And... Yuffie reached out and grabbed his hand, feeling sorry for him. Ciara had wondered about how a woman could give up her child to be experimented upon, and condemned the mother. But, they all knew, Lucretia had suffered horribly for what she had done. The harsh words Ciara directed towards the unknown mother had probably wounded the silent man.

"If we are ever going to solve the mystery of these memories completely, we will need to finish reading through them. Angeal hints at Ciara's death, and the girl herself seems to be expecting it. How this affects Sephiroth is what I am interested in. From what we know of him, his behaviors didn't change until Nibelheim. Is that when this girl died? What if this narrative holds more answers to the terrible crime committed at that time?" Reeve looked over at Vincent. "You're up, Valentine." The man in read didn't say anything for a long time, but then picked up a new paper and opened his mouth.

Vincent read softly, but his voice was powerful and each word he spoke carried a heavy weight. "But I get ahead of myself. My time to go face my death is close, so forgive me if my mind wonders. I met Ciara here, in this isolated valley, while I was flying over Gaia on what Zack called my 'angel's wing' to try to figure out my own thoughts. I met her as she was dying. It was her wish for me to transcribe the truth of what actually happened, so that someday maybe the world would forgive Sephiroth his sins. To me she insisted that what was about to happen was not his fault, but hers. That she was the worst sinner, that her faults more numerous than any. It's hard to believe that so pure a woman could make such an unforgivable mistake, but Ciara insisted. With her dying before me, what choice did I have but to agree with her? And so, she told me what happened to her when she and Sephiroth went into the mountains together. And as she told it to me, I will relate it to you. Upon arriving in this valley in which we all now sit, the first thing Ciara did was give Sephiroth two rules. One, he wasn't to go anywhere near the cave behind the waterfall in the valley next to this one under any circumstances. And two..."

0000, Nibel Mountains, April

"Tell me again why I must stay up here." Sephiroth's dry voice broke into my meditations for the fifth time this morning. I growled and sat up, shaking dirt and grass out of my hair to glower at the man currently sitting on the rocks above me. He was in his armor again, having just gotten done with a mission I probably didn't want the details about this morning. On his way back to Midgar he'd stopped in to visit me here in my new home, which has swiftly become his habit.

Two years ago when Sephiroth had basically run away with me, we'd argued. My sanctuary was an enclosed valley high in the Nibel mountains that no one could get to. I was safe here, and fresh, pure lifestream flowed freely here. Natural life was abundant so I could live off the land without problem. Plus, all my letters from Sephiroth were here, all the gifts he'd given me over the years. It was my home, and also the place I was ready to make my grave, though I didn't tell him that. When he'd realized that I intended to stay here only long enough to recover and then go on about my vagabond ways, he'd flatly refused to let me. Which had gotten me angry and I'd demanded he give me a good enough reason to stay. Sephiroth had countered by asking me what kind of life I would have if I kept drifting from place to place, never truly a part of anything. Even he was a part of something, through his friendship with Angeal and Genesis. He had connections. I had none. And seeing me living this way was too painful for him. While I fumbled trying to find a weakness in the argument he made so I could win and get him gone (so I could die) he'd completely blown away all my objections.

"Stay here, in these mountains. Make a new home. Shin Ra won't find you here. I'll build you a house. When I'm finished with missions I'll visit so you'll never be lonely. You'll be safe." His words then had shocked me, not so much for their sentimentality, though that was surprising enough, but also because he'd recognized what was missing in my life more than I did. Sephiroth had realized that I needed a home. And he probably sensed that if he didn't tie me down, I would vanish from his life. I'd argued with him half-heartedly, claiming that I couldn't stay and live only for myself, but he'd won, eventually, by pointing out that I wasn't living just for me; I was living for him too.

"You'll have the freedom I never will, Ciara." Plus, when he pointed out how crazy my powers were getting, I knew I would never be able to live in civilization again. And I also didn't want to win the argument. I didn't want to be left alone. I didn't want to face my fate. So he'd won. He'd built me a house. Furnished it with his own money. Sephiroth had even tamed Choco in order to bring me anything I needed. That traitorous bird liked him more than me now.

Shaking my head, I drew my thoughts back to the present and sighed, sensing his eyes never flickering from my form. "Because you distract me while I'm trying to keep my mumbo jumbo from swirling outta control and turning this valley into a flower shop." I snapped, dusting the dirt from my clothes and standing, knowing that my meditations for the day had ended. This valley was filled with pure lifestream, and Sephiroth's corruption made it so he could not stay here long. He hadn't asked me any questions when I told him that he had to stay up on the rocks surrounding this place and out of the valley as much as possible when he came here; he just did it.

I wasn't afraid of my valley being tainted; the levels of lifestream here were so high as to be dangerous for anyone not a Cetra. I was worried that he would fall ill or worse if he were exposed to this much purity at once. When he'd built me the small wooden house sitting in the middle of the valley, I'd directed the lifestream away from the area so he could work. Seeing the power that was flowing through this place, and how hard I'd had to work to keep it from overwhelming him, had probably convinced the man that it was logical to follow my advice on this mountain. Though I have wondered why he never asked why I was able to handle living here in these high levels of lifestream without falling ill.

Sephiroth watched as I walked towards him slowly, not moving from his seated position. The preternatural stillness of his body was deceiving, because it was an act. In the space between a breath and a blink he could be swirling into action, every move mesmerizing even as it destroys. The past two years had seen his unnatural grace and beauty grow even more compelling, and the coldness that had begun to overtake him when I first went to Midgar was a complete facade now. He was remote and emotionless, even around me sometimes. Especially when he had just finished a mission. I could feel the darkness inside him growing with each passing day, deepening as he continued on his path to destruction. But still he remained himself. His humor and wit eventually broke through as he relaxed, becoming the boy I first met and the man I loved again.

"How do I distract you?" Sephiroth's deep, deep voice broke into my thoughts again. I rolled my eyes and linked my hand behind my back. Live in the moment, Ciara; it's all you have left anymore.

"Let's see... an insanely beautiful man is staring at a girl all alone on the mountains. Who wouldn't be distracted?" I shot back. I'd stopped hiding my feelings towards him after our argument two years ago, though the man is shockingly slow on the uptake. Only recently had he started to respond to my remarks like this... like now. The purely masculine curve of his lips now made my hormones stand up and howl.

"So you find me beautiful?"

"Distractingly so."

"What should this distraction do, then?" Oh those eyes of his... sharp and so powerful, but willing to play... I shivered a little, but pressed my fingers to my lips in mock thought, then grinned impishly at him. Play we would then.

"Catch me!" I shouted, turning and sprinting as fast as I could for the small cabin in the center of the valley. I'm pretty fast but... I squealed when his arm suddenly slid around my waist and pulled me off the ground, swooping me up in a one-armed fireman's carry with an ease which left me breathless. Not even slowing a stride, Sephiroth carried me, laughing and flailing, to the small porch before setting me down. I stepped out of his arms reluctantly and brushed my hair back. "Though I guess it isn't really fair. You're SOLDIER and I'm me." I hopped up on the railing and faced him as he took up his normal position leaning against the wall with his arms crossed.

"That just gives me an advantage." Sephiroth countered, watching me as I swung my feet a little. I hummed a response, content to just stare at him. He shifted his gaze out to the valley stretching out behind me. The green grass, the beautifully blue skies... this place was as close to paradise as either one of us was ever gonna get.

"Sephiroth, how long can you stay this time?" I finally asked. It was never very long. Because of what this place was, I couldn't let him stay for very long. And, his job was always a demanding mistress. Anti-Shin Ra activities were surging up with greater frequency and the planet was uneasy.

He didn't look back at me, just kept watching the sky. "Tonight only. I have to return to Midgar." Such soft words stabbed at my heart. I sighed and looked at my toes.

"Lately I haven't been sleeping. When I try, I am filled with terrible restless nightmares. I see... horrible, horrible things. So much sadness and pain, an endless river of it." I whispered. I knew what these visions were. Not nightmares or fears, but the truth that the planet was showing to me. Atrocities being committed now, the ones coming soon. All of the darkness that was building was leading to certain fates which now couldn't be changed. And most painful of all, was each night, in my slumber without rest, I awoke screaming to the image of Sephiroth surrounded by flames, his once clear eyes filled with vile evil and a mind not his own. I squeaked when gloved fingers tilted my chin up, shocked to find that Sephiroth had moved right in front of me, caging me in with his larger body, without me even noticing.

The touch burned, even through his gloves. Neither one of us mentioned it. Instead, he studied the dark smudges under my eyes, thumb swiping against the fragile purple skin. Reaching up, I grabbed his hand in both of mine and drew it away from my face, holding it tightly while I stared up at him. In his eyes, I read conflict. Emotions flickered there, such deep, tender feelings that I knew that their existence would never be put into words. He would never say what I saw in his eyes. A small smile curved my lips.

"Do something for me?" I asked, instead of remarking on what we both knew needed to be discussed.

"Anything."

"I want to see you fight." His eyes widened almost imperceptibly at my words. Deep in my heart, I've always held a fear of Sephiroth's weapon, because I see it drenched in the crimson blood of my mother and the villagers. So it has always made me uneasy, and though I tried to hide it, I know that he picked up on it. Which is why rarely will he even bring his weapon out around me. "Everything about you, Sephiroth. I... I need to see it all." I spoke quickly, almost saying what I had sworn never to say. I can't let him know, to verbalize how I feel. Because if I become any more precious to him than I am now, then when I go to meet my destiny, I might become the biggest weakness in the impenetrable will he has surrounding himself in which keeps him pure.

"Alright. But... who shall I fight?" He asked, pulling his hand free. I smiled at him and jumped off the rail, which meant I was standing almost plastered against him. I tilted my head back and met his gaze. The man never needed anything spelled out for him. He just nodded and stepped around me, heading for the open space of the valley center to give us space. And with a nearly seven foot blade we would need it. Once there, he lifted his left hand and in a shower of darkly corrupted mako, summoned his Masamune blade to his hand. I winced a little at the stab the corruption gave me, but walked out to him, my bare feet making no sound on the grass.

Mimicking him, I held out one hand and summoned my weapon to me. It appeared in a swirl of pure lifestream, a large staffed weapon taller than me. It was from the hilt and seamlessly slid into a very thin silver blade at one end, but around the blade were two golden 'wings' which could extend outward to form a type of bow in order to allow for what I consider to be a rather effectively destructive attack. These golden ornaments attached to the middle of the staff and were ornate in design, almost beautiful, but the outer edges were sharp, so they weren't just for show. I swung the spear around with a little twirl and smirked at the silver devil standing across from me.

"After you." He said, graciously giving me the first go. He didn't seemed surprised to see me with my weapon at all. Well, he was someone with a mythical weapon, too, so I guess it wasn't that extraordinary for him. Shrugging, I lifted the spear and darted forward with a yell.

Sephiroth is fast, I've always known that. But I've never realized how fast he is. He slipped away from my first attack with just a millisecond left to dodge and then swung at me, making me spin away and block with the shaft of the spear. Even though I could tell that the swing wasn't at full strength, I felt vibrations go through my entire body from the impact of his hit. I bared my teeth. Kiddy gloves are off, then. Setting my feet, I swung faster than the first time, following the attack with a spinning kick using the momentum from the swing to propel myself forward. Sephiroth leapt backwards and landed lightly, almost floating down.

"Is that all you've got?" He asked, tilting his head to the side with a small smile. I opened my mouth to tell him not to be cocky when I felt a breeze around my thighs. Looking down, I saw that my long skirt was now a mini-skirt, the extra fabric dangling from the end of Sephiroth's sword. When had he gotten a hit in?! With a flick of his wrist, he sent the white fabric soaring up into the air and out of sight. I gaped at him for a moment, then felt the heated flush of anticipation fill me. So that's the game he wanted to play...

"Not even close. Are you ready?" I snapped, darting forward before getting a response. Not that I needed one. This man is always ready.

We leapt around the clearing, trading ringing blows and the deadly ends of our weapons passing just inches from exposed skin. We whirled and jumped, trading blow after blow in the air, only to land and jump back into the fray. Each time we met, another scrap of my dress vanished. First one sleeve, then the other. The back was cut. The hem rose higher until I was flashing my bum at him each time I ducked under another attack. The smirk on his face spoke more than ever for his feelings. The bastard was enjoying this. I was too. My heart pounded and hot blood rushed through my body. Each time a new part of my body was revealed by his slowly cutting away my clothes, I felt a visceral thrill rush through me. I tried to return the favor, reaching for his coat edge or a strand of hair, but the man was just too fast, slipping away at the last second. At one point, he managed to lock my weapon with his, using his height to bear down on me. The hilt end of my staff dug into the ground by my feet as I strained against him, trying to break free. Conversely, our hair tangled together, silver mixing with honey gold, tying us together. Gritting my teeth, I glowered at him as he watched me, amusement plain in his eyes. Our faces were so close.

A sudden devious thought popped into my head and I smiled. Before Sephiroth had a chance to react, I stood on my toes and bit his chiseled jaw, making sure I lapped at the injured area lightly with my tongue before drawing away. It shocked both of us, but I managed to make him snap straight so I was able to slip away from the body lock he'd had me trapped in. Though I was flushed with embarrassment for my forward action, I let out a little hoot of victory, pumping my fist. He stared at me, eyes wide, as he brought his free hand up to touch the spot I'd bitten. His eyes shifted over to me, gleaming in consideration, the heat there touching me almost like a physical caress. Oooh... guess Sephiroth likes being challenged. Feeling my entire body becoming hypersensitive, I bared my teeth at him in mock aggression, eyes probably shining in invitation. We shouldn't, this was wrong, the reasons why I had to keep him at a distance were dancing through my mind, but I shoved them all back and lifted a hand, beckoning him to me.

With that deadly smirk growing on his face, he flipped the way he was holding his sword. Instead of holding it forward like a regular sword with the blade out in front, he held it underhanded, the blade behind his back over his shoulder. I could feel in the sudden chill against my skin that meant this was Sephiroth when he was being serious. But even as I felt a small trickle of fear, my exhilaration overwhelmed it. Standing there with the wind pulling his hair out around him, emanating a strong aura that drew me in despite the darkness in it, I found that I couldn't do anything to deny the feelings I had towards him. I love him. I want him. I blinked and he was gone, moving so fast I lost sight of him. But my senses are acute, and i could feel him angling around behind me, so I whirled with the spear.

The weapons clashed together with jarring force. Then he slid away and I felt a slight tug of fabric at my chest, then a release. Glancing down, I saw the swells of my breasts through the sudden gash that had appeared in my bodice. Now there were only little scraps of fabric clinging to my body, leaving me fighting mostly naked. I snarled. Who would have known that Sephiroth was a pervert? It's such a guy thing to fantasize about a woman fighting a man dressed only in her skin...

When I felt the air stir at my side, instead of lashing out with my spear I ducked and slid, reaching up and grabbing the belt used to hold his coat shut. With a twist of my fingers, I opened the latch and then rolled free, up to my feet, with the belt held in my finger triumphantly. Sephiroth was apparently not expecting that and he looked down at his coat, then over at me. I whirled the belt over my head like a lasso then dropped it, feeling the cool leather slide against my skin. Slowly a smile appeared on his face and he swung his sword, the weapon making a whistling noise as it cut through the air. I smiled sweetly and beckoned at him again, but my chest was heaving and I was drenched in sweat.

Compared to me, Sephiroth was breathing normally and had yet to start sweating. I knew, as did he, that even though I was a talented fighter, the outcome of this battle was already decided. But I have never been a person to simple give up. I wanted to see Sephiroth fight. I want to dance with him, with blades, the most intimate play this man could engage in. Everything about him, I want to know and be imprinted on. My desires no longer shocked me. I accepted two years ago that I am incredibly selfish and not worthy of the destiny I was given.

Sephiroth attacked me this time, jerking me back to the present. I swung the spear up again, blocking him as he slid from one attack to the next so smoothly that there was no opening for me to take. For a long moment, there was only the sudden press and then release of his body against mine as he fought left handed, using his right to ghost touches over my skin. Then my foot slipped on a patch of grass trampled smooth by someone's booted foot and I shrieked, starting to fall, but he caught me with his right hand, holding me half bent over like a dancer. I stared up at him, chest heaving and dress falling off my body, the tear having grown too large with all my moving and fighting. Slowly, he helped me straighten and lowered his arm, vanishing his sword. I let go of my spear and stretched my arms over my head, stretching. I could feel his eyes on me.

"I'm wiped but you're fresh as can be. Strongest man in Shin Ra, for certain." I told him, lowering my arms. "But that was amazing. Thank you for indulging me." Normally by now he would have at least made some sort of sound to let me know he was listening. Concerned, I turned back to face him. He was staring down at his hands, face hidden by his bangs. "Sephiroth?" I asked, stepping back towards him and reaching out with my hand.

Before I touched him, his hand snapped out and he grabbed my wrist, pulling me forward so I was pressed against his chest. Both his arms wrapped around me and he bent over me, silver hair falling like a curtain around me so all I could see, smell, feel... was him. I curled my hand against his chest, heart thudding. His heat surrounded me, a living desire I could feel against my skin.

Even without speaking, I knew his intent. His silence was the question. I should say no. I should push him away and kick him out of this valley. I should have cut him down while we were fighting. Should have should have should have... I shoved it all out of my mind. I pushed out my fate as a Cetra and his as Calamities Vessel. Right now, all I wanted to think about... all I wanted, was to be a woman. And he just wanted to be a man. Not SOLDIER 1st Class Sephiroth, not the man in black, not the hero, but just a man. I closed my eyes and leaned against him, wrapping my arms around his back. "If all it took to make you want me was a fight I should have punched you eight years ago, instead of wasting all these years, dancing around this." I whispered. He chuckled in his throat.

"Right. Ciara..." He tailed off and I felt his arms loosen, so I took a tiny half step back from him, reaching up to run my fingers along his jaw. So uncertain... and so strong. I smiled.

"There are many reasons why we shouldn't, why we can't, but... I don't care. I want to." I said, stepping back again and holding my hand out to him, palm up. "Sephiroth." This was it, I knew it. He was leaving tomorrow morning to go back to Midgar. I knew, in that damnable way I knew everything, that he would become wrapped up in the events happening there and not make it back to these mountains. And if I were to lie with him... if I allowed him to touch me, to invade me, to conquer me... My body is weak. I cannot handle any corruption. To embrace him was to embrace my own death. I smiled. "Will you, with me?" So be it then.

He took my hand in his, eyes cat-bright. Lacing my fingers through his, I turned and lead him back to the house, my heart pounding at what I was about to do. I sent up a silent warning to any ancestors floating around to keep their opinions to themselves and just leave me alone for now. Once inside, I closed the door behind me and then let go of his hand, walking to the simple bed I'd made under the window inside. The whole cabin was just two rooms, the large main space where I slept and ate, and the smaller room in the back the bathroom. When it was just me the space seemed open enough, but Sephiroth filled every inch of the cabin with his presence. I got onto my knees on the bed and opened the window so that sweet air flowed into the room.

As I lowered my hands I felt him come up behind me. His right hand grabbed my chin, tilting my head to the side so he could lower his head and trail his lips down the blood pounding in my neck. While he licked and bit me, his left hand ripped the tattered shreds of my dress off of my body, pulling the fabric away from my skin, leaving me only in my undergarments. A soft gasped escaped my lips when he suddenly bit down hard enough on the soft skin at the junction of my neck and shoulder, leaving a bruise sure as the dawn. I reached around and sank my fingers into his hair. He was dominant, I could tell. But that didn't mean I couldn't play.

While his gloved left hand spread heat memorizing the shape of my body, I traced his face blind. The shape of his jaw, so that the imprint of his face would be left behind on my fingertips. Though I couldn't see it, because he held my chin and forced my to face forward as he nuzzled through my hair to find the nap of my neck and claim it with a hard bite, I could feel it. The touch of his lips against my skin seared me. I could feel it, the burning collision of my purity against the corruption in him. And when his tongue slipped out to sooth the mark left on me, I hissed in pain. He stopped, hand falling from my jaw. I berated myself. I will not allow this stupid reaction to stop this from happening.

"Ciara?" Sephiroth's deep voice carried concern, but also heat. It was the first honest human emotion I had ever really heard in those cold tones before. Usually his natural arrogance and surety hid his feelings. But not today. I brushed his hand aside and turned, still on my knees, and grabbed his face with both hands. Leaning forward, I kissed him, brushing my lips against his then sliding my hands back until they were buried deep in his hair. I didn't really know what to do - I've never done this before. And I know neither has Sephiroth. He'd written to me once about how he was often teased by Genesis for never having been with a woman. 'Men often cannot handle looking me in the eyes when speaking, and women can hardly bear to be in the same room with me. Who, then, can I have to sleep with if the world is frightened of me?' His response had shut up Genesis, but he'd been disturbed by it and written me. And I'd told him that one day he would find the one woman in Gaia who would know who and what he was, and love him despite it all. 'And she'll just love you, with all she has. And for her, for you, there will be no others.' I guess even though I'd been unaware of my feelings then, I'd still been predicting how the future would go for both of us.

I drew back from the kiss, breathless, and started to push the coat and pauldrons from his shoulders. He lifted a hand and stepped away, taking the reinforced coat and armor off himself, folding it with a warrior's precision. Bared to the chest, he glanced up at me. I swallowed hard and reached around behind my back, undoing the hooks holding the undergarment closed and sliding it off so that nothing obstructed his view of my chest. I flushed bright red and looked away. I wasn't a large woman at all. I'd passed myself off as a boy in the past.

Sephiroth, however, sucked in a soft breath, hands freezing just above his belt as his eyes glued themselves to my chest. This man who was not disturbed facing down monsters and entire armies alone, was turned to stone seeing a woman's chest. Talk about a confidence boost. Swallowing hard, I reached out with shaking hands and tugged the gloves from his hands, dropping them to the floor. Then I held his wrists lightly and moved his arms out of the way. "Can I?" I whispered, face blooming into heat.

"...of course." He spoke softly, and I could feel the uncertainty in his voice. I tugged his belt free of his pants and dropped it, then started to open his pants when he caught my elbows and made me stand on my knees. I tilted my head at him. "Boots come off first. The pants are tucked into them." He told me. I looked down at the laced up shoes covering his legs to the knees and felt stupid for not realizing that myself. Sephiroth sat on the edge of the bed and bent over, starting to unlace his boots. I stared at his back, mesmerized by the sight.

His silver hair fell forward on either side of him, leaving the white expanse exposed. It was perfectly smooth and unblemished skin, taut over defined muscles. I didn't even know it was possible to have defined back muscles, but this guy did. His shoulders were actually broad, but he was so thin and tall that it didn't look like it until he was undressed. Now I could see the tapering of his chest down to his hips, a reverse triangle of muscle that was incredibly attractive. With him bent, his spine pressed against his skin, strong and defined. I couldn't resist. Steadying myself with a hand on his hip, I leaned forward and kissed one vertebrae.

Sephiroth's entire body jumped at the brief contact. I smiled against his skin and pressed my chest against his back, the heat coming off of his body making my breasts tingle, a heavy, heady feeling filling me. Slipping my arms around his front, I slid my hands over his shoulders and felt my palms down to his pectorals as I rested my head on his shoulder, nuzzling his ear. I felt like I needed to rub myself all over this man, leave my scent and feel imprinted on his entire body so that he couldn't get away from me. I grabbed the lobe of his ear with my teeth and tugged it lightly. A soft grunt escaped his throat, startling me. I let go and glanced at him, a little shocked to see a soft bridge of heat arching across his cheeks.

He finished unlacing his boots and tugged them off. He wasn't wearing socks, though how that could be comfortable I don't know. I let him stand. Keeping his back to me, Sephiroth hooked his hands in his black trousers and pulled them down. My eyes widened when I realized he didn't wear underwear either. The perfect, firm globes of his buttocks filled my vision as he bent and pulled the pants off, folding them and placing them atop his other clothes before facing me. I let my eyes drink him in.

Despite his beauty, no one would ever mistake Sephiroth for anything but a guy. He has sharply defines, wiry muscles in every inch of his body. His shoulders tapered down to a firm and narrow waist that had those ridges at his hips which drove me absolutely mad. His thighs were sturdy and strong, long like his legs. And between them... undeniable proof of his manliness. The length of his Masamune was not an attempt to compensate for a small package. If anything, it was a symbolic representation of how extraordinarily gifted he is. When he'd slept nude in his house, I hadn't looked, but now I let my eyes devour him.

I let out an admiring breath and forcibly dragged my eyes back up to his face. Sephiroth still looked uncertain and a little ashamed, so I opened my arms to him. I give him everything. Smirking a little, he put his knees next to mine and climbed over me in the bed, forcing me to lean back. His hand slid up my chest, between my breasts, and grabbed my chin, tilting it upward as his lips descended and devoured me.

This kiss was not shy. No, it was all heat and want. He licked the seam until I opened with a gasp and then his tongue charged into my mouth like he owned it, dancing with mine until he subdued it. Exploring, he tilted both our heads at different angles so he could lick and suck, bite and nip, drive me mad. I dug my hands into his hair, stroking the unfairly soft strands the way I have longed to most of my life. I arched my chest forward so I could rub my breasts against his heated chest. At first contact my nipples contracted into hard points, startling me. Okay, maybe I should have read up on this... My eyes widened. Wait a moment.

I grabbed a fistful of his perfect hair and yanked. Sephiroth pulled back reluctantly, a thin string of saliva connecting our mouths until distance made it break. He wiped it clean with a careless swipe of his thumb and raised an eyebrow at me.

"W-wait. I thought you were a virgin!" I said, trying to gather my scattered wits. If he can kiss like this, then that can't be true, can it? He smiled at me, a true smile, which heated me up and melted me.

"I am." Done answering me, Sephiroth ducked his head and latched onto my breast. I gasped out a strangled sound and clutched at his head, body going numb. From the pleasure or the pain of having him touch me, I wasn't sure. Gritting my teeth, I pushed at his shoulders.

"Can't be... these tricks... how...Sephiroth!" I choked out, managing to pull him away from my body. How had he gone from shy and uncertain to devouring me in such a short amount of time? I was flushed and sweaty, my entire body twitching and shivering as his skin slid against mine. Seeing how frazzled I was, Sephiroth pushed me over so I was laying on my back under him and stretched out over me, held up on his arms. His beautiful hair pooled on my chest and the bed beneath me as those cat green eyes stared into mine.

"Books I read. And a fair amount of imagination. Despite what people assume about me, I have mastrubated before. I was a teenage boy at one point." The words were totally unexpected, making me blink. Then I smiled and started laughing, reaching up and linking my hands behind his neck. He let me hang off him, easily able to handle it.

"The great and mighty Sephiroth jerked himself off? Oh man... so what was your material, Shin Ra Scientists, Female Swimsuit Edition?" I teased, lifting my legs to his flanks and stroking him with my feet. He looked away, a true blush fanning out across his face. I stared, stunned. Sephiroth... was blushing? An evil grin stretched my face and I rubbed my body against his harder. "Come on, no secrets between lovers." I teased, really wanting to know.

He blew his bangs out of his face and then met my gaze squarely again. "Eight years ago, after meeting you, the only 'material,' as you call it, that would work was imagining you." He said, flooring me. I gaped at him, unable to speak. He leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss against my forehead before resting his against me. Tears built in my eyes and spilled out the corners. There it was. His confession without words, the entirety of what he felt for me. And yet what he has been dreaming about, imagining for eight long years... this would be the only time it would happen. The unfairness of it was a stone in my chest. Sephiroth leaned closer and took my tears onto his tongue, swallowing them. I clung to him tighter.

"Make me fly." It was choked out and I don't know if he understood or not, but tears flowing freely down my face, I stretched up against him and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face in his shoulder as I cried. He wrapped his arms around me and stroked his hands through my hair. He always does this, to help me calm down. It is a simple thing, but it shows how deep his feelings run for me. Without a single word, without even asking, he knows exactly what I need at any given moment.

"I don't deserve you, Sephiroth." I whispered thickly, able to see the truth of that now. Out of the two of us here, in this valley, the one with the darkness inside is the most pure of heart and mind. I have manipulated and lied, deceived and misdirected, altered fates of those innocent. He has done none of this, just lived his life honestly despite the sin it piled onto him. I truly do not deserve someone as good as him.

I squeaked when warm hands slipped onto my shoulders and then slid down my arms to grab my hips, pulling me back up against a muscular, hard chest that I could probably spend hours exploring, given half a chance. I hadn't expected him to stop petting me, but now that I was paying attention, I guess I had calmed down. He is so attuned to me... I yelped again and flushed, partially from having cried, but mostly because his hands were currently cupping my breasts. More like kneading them, taking special care to play with my aureoles and nipples, before pinching them between his fingers. I unlatched my hands from his neck and covered his with my own, stilling them for my sanity. I cannot think when he touches me like this. This stupid warrior confuses the hell outta my rational thought process.

Sephiroth wasn't one to be deterred though. He pulled his hands free and captured my lips again, sliding his tongue in and once again stealing my ability to breath. My back arched when his hand dipped between my legs, the shock making me push my chest into his. I bit my lip, hard, to keep my mind focused.

"H-hey..." I whispered. Sephiroth's tongue lapped at my neck and he just hummed a noncommittal response, absorbed in what he was doing. He drew his mouth away as one of his sly fingers slid into my body. I couldn't help it; scared as I was by this new experience, I moaned. It felt... like nothing I had ever experienced before. I'm twenty-three years old and have been in love with this beautiful man for almost eight years of my life; I've touched myself before, imagined it was him, but this... not even close. Just one little finger pushing into me made my entire body tighten and strain for something. I don't know what.

"Do not talk, Ciara." He whispered. "Forget everything but me." Och, this guy! If I didn't love him so much I would have killed him years ago. I reached down and pulled his hand away from me. I wasn't ready for that just yet, I don't think. Just a brief caress down there had bubbles of light filling me from the inside out. I put my hands on his shoulder and lifted one of my legs, rubbing my calf against his flank. Two can play the aggressive game here. Besides, it looked like he was more than ready to play. My lover seemed to be the type to like dominance and fight in a woman. I am more than ready to deliver.

I leaned in and licked my way up his corded neck. Sephiroth really is so strong, his body muscled and hard, and he doesn't have any scars. His body heals better than any humans, probably because of the corruption inside of it. I hummed happily as he leaned down and claimed my lips with his own. His tongue lapped at the seam of my lips and I gladly opened for him this time, sucking his tongue inside and stroking it with my own. He groaned in his throat and pulled me hard against him, one hand sliding down to cup and fondle my rear, pulling my hips hard against his so he could rub against me. I purred a little and let go of his tongue, scattering playful kisses across his face and nose before I grabbed his ear in my teeth and bit down on it. He yelped.

"No biting!" He said, pinching the skin at my waist in retaliation. I giggled at the unexpectedly childish reaction and moved my mouth to the curve of his shoulder, latching my teeth in there and sucking – hard. If he could mark me I could mark him! I licked the spot I had just turned red and pushed back from him a little, sliding my hands down over his flat chest muscles and giving his flat nipples a brief caress before sliding my left hand down, the tips of my fingers stopping just before the area that was begging for my touch. I wrapped my right arm around his neck and smiled up at him.

"Don't let me fall." I told him. He looked at me for a moment, then smirked as he understood what I intended, easily hoisting me up in his arms. I wrapped both my legs around his waist and licked my lips suggestively.

"Apparently I was not the only one with an active imagination" He said, allowing me to slide free of the prison of flesh he had trapped me in. Sephiroth lay down and spread himself out for me. He was more than ready for this, his member about as hard as his longsword now. I stared down at him and licked my lips. He had no idea exactly how active my imagination really was, but he was about to find out. This little Cetra was curious.

"Change of plans; fun first, then I'll ride." I told him, scooting down to kneel by his hips, where his manhood was proudly waving hello to me. One of his hands touched my hip and I slapped it away. "Nope; you can't touch, just watch."

"Ciara, you are going to kill me." He groaned. I laughed and got to work. Reaching out, I wrapped one hand around his base, his thickness filling my palm nicely. With the other hand I gently, tenderly played with his testicles. Sephiroth moaned again, more harshly this time. I smiled like the vixen I was and glanced up at him. He was watching me between half-closed green eyes. I pumped his shaft with my hand once, and his whole body jerked. Amazing. Here he is, a being much stronger than I am, and probably able to destroy me with a simple wave of his hand what with the power his body houses, and yet I can control him with just one hand. Deciding to torture him a little more, I lowered my head and kissed the delicate, tender skin between where his groin met his shaft. He groaned harshly, hands reaching out and grabbing my head. His fingers tangled in my hair and his nails scraped against my scalp, a non verbal warning that I understood. Guess he isn't the only one attuned to the person they love.

I blew air over his straining length and giggled as it twitched. "Baby." I taunted, rubbing my nose against him. I squeezed his base tightly and let go of his balls to bring my other hand into the game. Using both, I fisted his length and slowly, too slowly, started stroking him. I wanted to bring him to fever-pitch, as much for my enjoyment as for my comfort. As crazy with desire as we both were, I didn't know if we would be able to take the care we would have to when approaching this. I am, after all, a virgin. Wasn't this supposed to hurt or something? I know that Sephiroth would rather cut off his own arm than cause me any kind of pain, but with desire clouding his mind and me in his arms, it might be inevitable.

Finally, I opened my mouth and gave his tip a nibble, making him grit his teeth and arch up into me. One of his hands let go of my hair and slid down my back and between my thighs. I flushed a little when he paused there, embarrassed by how wet I already was for him. I guess this time there would be no dissuading him. One of his fingers easily slid into my core and I lifted my mouth off his member to gasp out a breathy curse, choking on a strangled moan when he pumped the digit in and out of me quickly, a shallow but lethal penetration.

"I thought I said no touching, SOLDIER?" I rasped, panting. I couldn't see it, but I could hear the smirk in his response.

"You looked like you wanted it, Ciara." He thrust his finger deeper, punctuating his point. I cried out, then gritted my teeth and licked the underside of his shaft from base to tip. He was pulsing in my grasp and from his harsh breathing, I was guessing it wouldn't take much more to send him over the edge. My own body was liquid with desire and covered in a light sheen of sweat. I let go of him and rose to my knees beside him. He pulled his hands away, eyes glittering as he stared at me. I knew I wasn't much to look at, but from his gaze, you'd think I was the most beautiful woman in the world.

Moving with a sensuous grace only he could inspire in me, I straddled him. His member rested against me and I rubbed myself against him simply because it felt good, not because I was a trained seductress. Leaning forward, I claimed his lips as I reached between us and grabbed him, aiming that mighty sword of pleasure up where its sheath was waiting. He let me, probably aware that, despite his dominance, I needed to be the one to do this. He probably didn't know why. But I had to accept him completely on my own for my own reasons. This was Ciara and Sephiroth, the man and the woman, making love. I was proving that to myself by taking him into my body willingly. I broke our kiss and sat back, his tip at my entrance. I was hot and he was ready, so I smiled at him with all my and, in one move, lowered myself onto him.

"Sephiroth" I groaned, the breath rushing out of me with the sharp edge of pain that lanced through me. I had to remain perfectly still, my thighs quivering as he invaded me. His length and girth stretched me and pushed painfully against a body not used to this at all. And having him inside me burned. His body was corrupt, mine was pure. Already I could feel the agony from his invasion settling into my bones. But that would come later. Now, I wanted to enjoy making love with the man who held my heart. Beneath me, Sephiroth was about as tense and strained as I was. He knew that I needed to grow accustomed to his size, but he desperately wanted to move, I could read that in his eyes. Shaking and torn between the pleasure and the pain, I held my hands out. He lifted his up and I laced my fingers through his, bracing myself on his strong arms as I slowly, very slowly, raised myself off his length.

He slid out slowly and I moaned at the sensation. I had no one else to compare him to, but Sephiroth must be what all women want in a lover. When just his tip remained within my body, I lowered myself back down, still slowly and with great control, because I still hurt. His muscles stood out as he held his entire body in check, but his eyes blazed fire at me.

"Ciara... please..." He ground out. I rolled my eyes at him and blew out a breath, starting to adjust to the feel of him within me. My body was getting used to this. Growling, Sephiroth reared up and latched his mouth onto my breast, sucking hard on my nipple. I gasped and my entire body bowed, sending him sliding deeper into me. I choked and started to rock my hips faster, not caring anymore who did what or how. His mouth moved up to my neck and he bit down, hard, his teeth slicing through my tender skin. I cried out as he lapped at the wound he had caused, taking my blood into him. I had the crazy though that maybe my blood could save him, but then the fire inside me wiped out all capacity for rational thought. I felt my love for him grow to overwhelming, welling up and spilling out of me without control until I thought that I would die.

He suddenly let go of my hands and rolled me beneath his body, pushing against my thighs and spreading my legs apart. I was panting now, hardly able to draw breath, when he drew out and slammed back in with all his might, hitting me at the perfect angle. He drew out a soundless moan and I arched into him, my hips undulating to follow the brutal rhythm he set. That easily, I came, squeezing down tightly on his member inside me, hard enough to make him groan as if in pain, but he somehow managed to not follow me to completion. I reached up and cupped his face, staring into his cat-green eyes as my body continued to spasm around him. He looked so savage, his desire written clearly on his face, but the love he felt for me blazed through his eyes right along with the hunger. He was panting hard, his mouth open. I stared and licked my lips, tilting my chin up a fraction. When it came to him, I lost all control and only wanted to feel his love and passion.

Sephiroth leaned down and took my mouth with his own, sucking at my lips and stabbing his tongue into my mouth. I grabbed his shoulders and hung on as he made love to me with an impassioned vehemence, my nails digging into his skin until I was certain I was leaving marks on him.

"Don't stop, Sephiroth, please." I begged when he slowed down, not wanting this moment to ever end. He grinned down at me, his face and body covered in sweat like mine and his silver hair tangled. I transferred my grip to fistfuls of his hair so that I wouldn't hurt him, trying to wrap my legs around him to keep him in me. My legs trembled too much for me to hold him, though.

"I'm not stopping, promise. I want to make you scream." He whispered, pulling out of me and flipping my limp body over and reentering me from behind. His arm wrapped around me, under the breasts, and he started to ride me hard. I was panting and moaning, almost unable to breathe from the pleasure rolling over me, when he stiffened behind me and came with a shouted groan, burying his face in my hair. As his warmth filled me and splashed against my insides I reached my zenith a second time, harder than the first, and I came with a cut off scream. His heat inside of me continued to burn, the fire spreading, but I just wrapped my arms and legs around him and clung to him tighter, not allowing him to pull free of my body's hold.

Sephiroth huffed out a small laugh and kissed my ear. "That was better than my imagination, Ciara." He told me, a touch of humor in his voice as his hands traced soft circles on my damp skin. I shivered as the soft mountain air danced over my skin, the scent of flowers carried strongly with it... wait, what?

Shoving him off of me, I sat up, ignoring the protests of my body, and got on my knees to stare out the window. Outside, the valley was filled with the largest, most beautiful lifestream flowers I had ever seen in my entire life. Every inch of the valley floor was covered with them and in some places the lifestream still swirled around the plants. They all gave off a glow of pure life and swayed in the soft breeze.

I felt his heat against my back and then he wrapped his arm around my waist, chin on my shoulder as he looked out. "Your flowers...?" He questioned, fingers stroking along my hips. I held onto his arms and shook my head.

"I... yeah, I think so. I mean.. I guess they popped up in response to my emotions..." I trailed off, uncertain. I was never going to tell Sephiroth I loved him. I couldn't, not when I was going to leave him. But these flowers pretty much just said it for me. He already knew that these bloomed in response to my feelings. And these... they would never fade or die. They had been born out of the highest act and expression of love. The planet would sustain them as long as she lived. I could feel the certainty of that in my soul.

Sephiroth pulled me down to the bed and laid me out, wrapping his larger body around mine from behind, his hair spreading over us like a blanket. I held his arms as he held me, facing the wall. Tears overflowed from my eyes and I cried silently. I couldn't help it. I knew... already I could feel the pain gnawing at the edge of my senses, an agony that would continue to grow until I finally went on to my destiny. And I could feel the distance yawning between me and Sephiroth with each breath I drew in. Grabbing a fistful of his hair, I buried my face in it, drawing in his scent and weeping.

He turned me so I faced him and pressed my face into his shoulder. "I will come back for you, Ciara. It may be awhile; things at Shin Ra aren't as they should be. But I will return for you." He told me, stroking my hair and wiping my tears away with his thumbs. I looked up into his eyes and felt his sincerity. It hurt. So much, the pain a solid rock in my chest. It's a good thing I used up my emotional power making those flowers bloom; right now, with what I was feeling, I'd probably kill them if I had the energy. Sliding my hands up to his face, I pulled him down for a trembling kiss, continuing to cry.

"Sephiroth, I... I'll always be there for you, as long as you need me. I'll never leave you. I'll wait for you." I vowed, meaning it. Until the day he was saved from his fate, I would never slumber in the planet. I would share all the worlds joys and pains, live and die with each being on the surface, until he was saved. If he fell into shadow, I would fall with him. And I would suffer while he did. It is within my power to do so. I felt my ancestors granting my vow. Sephiroth would never be truly alone in this world. He might never realize I am there... but I will be.

My lover nodded. He thought it a regular vow. He didn't know I had just tied my entire life to him. Curling against his chest, I let him hold me as my sorrow continued to seep out, silent tears for all the years of loneliness facing both of us. Throughout the night we kissed and touched, each aware that something fragile had been built between us. We didn't speak anymore. We, for one night, just were.

When morning came, Sephiroth slid free of my arms and dressed quietly. I sat up and wrapped the white blanket he'd brought me from his home around my body. I knew he had to go back. I knew this would be our last moment together, the precious last moments where he would be him and I would be me. It hurt so much, the pain and the darkness in my body that I wanted to scream, to weep, anything to keep what I knew was coming from happening. But fate had decided. There was nothing I could do now, so I didn't cry. I wouldn't shed any more tears about this, not where he wasn't there to wipe them away. Only where he could hold me, could see me, would I ever shed a tear again, until the day he was freed. So I just watched as he put on the armor and became SOLDIER 1st Class Sephiroth once more. He stood beside the bed and cupped my face, staring at me. I twitched my lips up in to a small smile, letting my love for him shine through. I hid my sorrow, hid the pain gnawing away at me even now. I would not taint our last moments...

"Next time we meet, Ciara... I will have a question for you." He said, leaning down and kissing my forehead gently. I knew, what he wanted to ask me. I could feel it pressing against my skin. My heart broke. But still I smiled.

"My answer will be yes." I whispered, all I was able to do with the sorrow choking me. Sephiroth slid his fingers through my hair and with a beautiful full smile, the first I had ever seen on his face, walked out of the door and called Choco, flying away from me. I leaned out the window and watched until he was a speck on the horizon, then gone. Forever gone from me. Never again would we be able to get close... to touch. "Good-bye." I choked out.

The pain inside me suddenly bloomed, spreading rapidly and making my body arch. Nausea licked at my throat. Curling my hands into tight fists, I leaned over the side of the bed and heaved. Once the spasm had passed, I stared at the blood flowing across the floor, mixed with what I had eaten the day before. My stomach cramped again and intense, flame-like pain settled into every muscle in my body. My heart stuttered to a stop painfully, only to gallop into overdrive a second later. Shivers wracked my body while I sweated so much I was afraid I'd drench the blanket which still held Sephiroth's scent. I pushed it away, not wanting to soil it, and stared at the wall as my body tried to reject the corruption I'd allowed inside. I had chosen this. I knew the consequence of embracing him. I smiled and wrapped my arms around myself.

"Totally worth it." I croaked, gagging on another heave of blood trying to escape my body. I couldn't die yet. I had one last mission to complete. Reaching out with my mind, I coaxed the abundant lifestream into the cabin and allowed it to flow into my body. It hurt - burned worse than the pain inside me, as it battled with the corruption inside of me. But I gritted my teeth and bore the agony. "Worth it..." Turning my eyes to the window, I stared out at the field of flowers and smiled. They would be my eternal testament to the feelings I was never allowed to share. "I love you, Sephiroth."

But he would never hear that from me.


	6. Chapter 6

0001, Nibel Mountains, March 28th

I couldn't move my body. Not that there was much left of it for me to move. I sat out in the field of flowers which had never lost their vibrancy even an entire year after their creation. Out here, I could feel the whispers of the planet. I knew everything that went on. I knew of the mass SOLDIER dissertation. I knew the conflict between the SOLDIERs in the 1st class. I knew the agony all three of them were currently going through. I felt Zack's pain. I heard Cloud promise to help Tifa at the water tower. I listened as Reno and Rude fought AVALANCHE. I knew it all. But I could do nothing. Until I went to my fate, my body was useless. All I was now was an observer. Painful. I shouldn't still be alive, but I was. Because I had one mission left. My stubborn will refused to die. The lifestream was all that was keeping me alive. I had dragged myself out here with my arms months ago, wrapped in Sephiroth's blanket. Ever since I've sat under the open sky.

He would come soon. I have been tracking him, as he flies to try to escape his agony. I wish I could take it from him. All that he has learned only causes him pain. I wish I could give him what he wants most. But I can't. His fate has already been decided. And he accepted it. Soon he will go to the boy he loved like a son and make him carry the burden of destiny. But not yet. There he is...

The figure flying with one wing banked slowly and came in to land in the middle of the flower field, clearly startled to see a cabin out here. Then his eyes landed on me, covered by the white blanket, and widened. "Ciara, is that you?" He asked, clearly shocked. I smiled weakly at him.

"Hey Angeal. I guess you kept your promise after all. Though I don't think you meant it literally." I teased lightly. He looked at the wing on his shoulder with disgust, folding it against his body as he walked up and knelt beside me. His eyes studied me closely, probably looking for injury. Why else would I be so pale, so drawn. I lifted a hand, the skeletal appendage trembling.

"Ciara, what is wrong with you?" Angeal asked as he grabbed my hand. "Is it because of Jenova and us? Our blight on this planet, is it hurting you?" Will it take Aerith from Zack? I heard his unspoken fear and smiled. He is such a good man. A honorable man. He'll do what is right. Which was why I had waited for him.

Jenova, though... ah. Calamity. Someone gave it a name. How cute. "No. This is my punishment." I said, removing the blanket. The SOLDIER stumbled back from me, hand flying to his mouth. I quickly covered myself again, a little ashamed. "Disgusting, no? I'm dying. I won't live much longer. But before I go, I need you to do something for me."

"Anything." He said, his words taking me back to when another SOLDIER had said that to me. I shook the thought away.

"Inside the cabin, there's paper and pens. Lots of them. I need you to write the truth down. Write what I say and what you know. FIll in the the blanks. Leave nothing out. I need to leave behind the truth. We both do." I said, meeting his eyes. He understood me right away. The truth was all either one of us had left, though it left us floundering and suffering. He quickly went inside and got the papers, then sat beside me.

"How should I begin?" He asked, paper and pen at the ready. I closed my eyes and tilted my face up to the sky.

"This world has monsters enough without me adding to their number. I know my time will end soon, yet that even at its ending, the nightmare my time induced is only beginning. I still am not clear on how this happened..."

0001, Nibel Mountains, March 31

My voice faded as Angeal wrote down the last lines. Night was surrounding us, the stars our only light. We'd been at this for days now... I looked over at him. "Add whatever you like." I whispered, hardly able to focus my eyes any longer. He set the paper aside and knelt by my side, taking my hand in his as he watched me with pain in his eyes.

"Ciara... you've suffered so much. And you will continue to suffer... will this really happen? Will Sephiroth really fall to Jenova?" He asked, pain lancing his words. My eyes slid closed. "Ciara!"

"Sephiroth will fall. Zack will die. Cloud will fight. Aerith will make the sacrifice. Vincent will find hope and life. Nanashi will find love at last. I see and know so much, Angeal... I'm tired. But I will never sleep. Because Sephiroth will never truly die." I whispered, using the last of my will to open my eyes and look at Angeal. "He wanted to marry me. I said... I would say yes. One more favor?" My vision was fading. I was falling into the planet's embrace. Angeal gathered the remnants of my body into his arms and nodded.

"I wrote a letter... leave it where... he'll find it... please...Sephiroth." My voice failed and Angeal started calling my name, but I heard it not. Instead I fell, the pain in my body finally fading after the year of torment. I fell and the lifestream curled around me as I made my way to the core of the planet. But this time, my soul was free, no physical body binding me. I could feel everything. All the planet's life and joy, all her hidden injuries and pains. I knew all the secrets and was in all the lifestream. I... oh. I stopped at the core and opened my eyes, knowing at last the second name my mother had heard when I was born. I'm Ciara. I'm Minerva, the conscious of Gaia. I'm the goddess, with wings of black and white.

In me is Holy, the power to fight all darkness. I will give power and my life to Omega. I will visit dreams. And I will never stop fighting. In the darkness corrupting the core, I saw her again, this time not hidden. Her hideous snake-like body was revealed and she smirked at me. I smirked back.

"_You lost the battle, little goddess. I await only a small chance and that man will be mine._" She taunted in that vile voice. I smiled back, feeling my ancestors gathering around me as the armor of my life wrapped around me. I felt my spear and my shield, the planet's protection.

"He knows love, Jenova. You'll never wholly control him. And because he has known love, he will be stopped." I told her, laughing as she hissed and retreated into her black corruption, fading, for a time, from the planet's core. I looked around at the lives swimming around me, the flow of the planet, and felt the expansiveness of my life threatening to crush me. But I closed my eyes and fought it off. "I know love too. I will never stop fighting." I whispered, taking my first step into the void. Let my destiny begin.

0011, Nibel Mountains

"Ciara died in my arms. I buried her in this valley, where the flowers never died. Like she told me, there was a letter addressed to Sephiroth inside the cabin. Though I felt like I was doing her a misdeed, I opened it and read it. The contents... they made me cry. I copied them; I know Sephiroth. And apparently, he will fall, so I want some record of this letter to remind.

_'Sephiroth. If you're reading this, then it means I've finally gone on to join my ancestors in the planet. But I am still keeping my promise. I will always be with you. When you fall, I will catch you. When you cry, I'll hold you. So live your life. Live it for both of us. Forever, Ciara'_.

She sacrificed so much... for all of us. She is now acting as the planet's conscious, has become Minerva. One day, according to her, she will awaken as Holy when her niece Aerith summons her with the materia she left the girl. Her fight will never stop. But I cannot write about this any more. It is too much sorrow, too much pain. Sephiroth and Ciara loved but never had a chance. But they face their fate. I'm done running from mine. I will go to Zack and leave him my legacy. So here ends the records of Angeal Hewley, on March 31st, 0001. Truly, though I was just the scribe. These words are Ciara's last will. You who are reading this... I pray that the future she foresaw does not come to pass, but if it has, please forgive Sephiroth. His true self would not have committed such horrors. He was a man who had honor. Gaia guide you. Farewell." Vincent finished and put the paper down.

Everyone was silent. They all knew what happened next. They had lived it. In October of that year, Sephiroth would fall. Zack would die. All the pain and torment would begin. Horrible things happened. Jenova won, if only for awhile. Darkness fell. Gaia was covered in corruption.

Yuffie spoke first, jumping to her feet with her hands clenched. "It's all that Ciara's fault! She had so much power, she should've ended Sephiroth and spared us all!" She shouted, even as tears streamed down her face from what they had learned about this woman who had borne such a heavy burden.

"So then, should you have killed me, simply because I was destined to one day become Chaos and bring about the destruction of this world?" Vincent's soft words made her freeze, and she turned to face him with a stunned face. He patted her shoulder and then faced the others. "That is the same as the situation Ciara found herself in. I will one day destroy Gaia. There is a small chance I won't, though will you risk leaving me alive for it? Ciara chose to risk it, and that risk failed. We cannot blame her for that when we are making the same choice." His words dared anyone to make a complaint, but they couldn't. He was right.

"But... what broke Sephiroth enough for Jenova to take control of him? The betrayal of Angeal and Genesis didn't do it." Tifa asked, sounding confused. Cloud was going through the pack which had held all the papers and he froze, then pulled out a sealed envelope, with a scrawl unlike Angeal's script on it. "Cloud? What's that?" She asked. He didn't answer and instead broke the seal, opening the letter. It was just a few pages long. After a long moment, he sighed.

"This... is from Sephiroth." He said, waving the paper a little. The group around him stiffened. "It's dated December of 0007." The year they had been chasing Sephiroth all over Gaia, fighting him and trying to stop him from destroying the world. It was just before he'd used the black materia to summon Meteor.

"Well, don't tease us now, Cloud. Read the derned thang!" Cid said around his cigarette. Cloud nodded and began.

"I feel, since Angeal left the accounts of both he and my heart behind, I should add my own small contribution. I found myself coming here when Jenova left my mind enough that I could regain some of my old self. I don't know why; I'm poisoning this place just by stepping foot here. But... I got Ciara's letter. I received it before I left for Nibelheim. When I learned that she had died... I decided that I no longer had the drive to kill that I used to. I told Zack in all earnestness, that I wanted to leave Shin Ra, depending on circumstances. I should have left right away. Maybe I would have not become as I am. But I was too cowardly..."

0002, Midgar, September 20th

The man known as Sephiroth, a warrior renowned and feared throughout Gaia for his strength and cruelty, was brought to his knees by a small piece of paper. It was just a single small sheet, a bit wrinkled with age, but Sephiroth was unable to stand after reading it. His numb fingers were unable to hold it any longer and the paper floated to the ground. A pained gasp escaped his lips, the only sound he had made the entire time. The tall man hunched forward, palms flat on the ground, and stared at the floor sightlessly, eyes wide. his mind wanted to claim that the letter was a fake, but he knew that handwriting. He'd read and loved it almost every day of his life for eight beautiful years. And even if he could convince himself that someone had managed to fake her handwriting perfectly... Angeal had left a note of his own.

'_I know you don't often return here, so I don't really know when you'll get this letter. It could be days or years from now. Either way, I must let you know that it is true. I'm so sorry, but she has died, Sephiroth. She was wasting away... rotting from the inside out like some foul disease was eating her body. When I found her, she shouldn't have even been alive, but she was. She asked me to deliver this letter to you. I'm sorry. She died in my arms, but they should have been yours. If Genesis and I hadn't rebelled, they probably would have been. I buried her, in that valley where all her flowers grow. Maybe she will be happy now, in the planet. I don't know. Sephiroth, I can't express my sorrow to you. I will also be leaving you forever soon. I won't ask you to forgive me. But forgive her. Angeal.'_

Sephiroth knew that both letters were damnably real. The small piece of paper announcing the death of his heart, how long had it lain in his empty house, a building he could no longer enter because it had lost her scent, her presence? At least a year. That was how long Angeal's boy Zack had been carrying the Buster Sword. How long since Angeal had come to the boy to die. And in that time, Sephiroth had been cracking jokes at the rookies expense, even granting the boy leave to go be with the slum woman he loved because he was thinking of Ciara. And while he was doing so, she was rotting in the ground. His woman. His life.

Sudden pressure pushed against his skull, a throbbing nail of pain shoving into his mind from the outside. Sephiroth gritted his teeth and shoved the pain back. Genesis was still alive out there somewhere, he knew that. Until he got the truth from the man and learned what was truly going on at Shin Ra, he couldn't afford to be distracted. But once this mess was dealt with, then maybe it was time for Sephiroth to leave Shin Ra. He'd been thinking about it for a few years now. If he weren't part of Shin Ra, then Ciara could live with him, without having to hide. He would protect her from any coming after her. It was his dream.

Only a dream, now. The pain stabbed in again, but Sephiroth ignored it, shakily getting to his feet. Brushing his silver hair back, he drew in a deep breath and pulled his impenetrable emotionless armor on. The headache receded a little. Sephiroth then stared down at the two letters which had destroyed his world. Ciara... even in death, she was still in danger. Hojo still searched for her. He could not allow that madman to disturb her final rest. Snapping, Sephiroth caused the letter to be engulfed in flames, watching dispassionately as the edges curled and the floor caught fire as well. He saw the flames spreading to his house but did nothing to stop them, instead walking out and leaving the destruction behind. Any trace of Ciara needed to be destroyed, to protect her.

That night, Sephiroth didn't sleep. His cramped Shin Ra Quarters were no less comfortable than they ever were, but each time he closed his eyes, he saw a shifting shadow at the edge of his vision which frightened him. He'd sometimes seen it while awake, but when he did, he'd go find Ciara or one of her letters, which he kept in a securely locked safe, and the shadow would vanish. Now, there was no escaping that darkness lurking at the edge of his mind, or the pain inside of him.

While he laid there, Sephiroth allowed himself to shed a single tear. He wasn't a man given to emotions or crying, but Ciara was gone. The single light in his life was no longer guiding him and he felt like he was slowly sinking into a dark mire he would never be able to escape from. "Ciara..." he whispered her name like a talisman, covering his ears the way he had as a child when strange voices had kept him from sleeping at night. They were back. As a child, Professor Gast had helped him keep those nightmares away. As an adult, Ciara had. But both were gone. He was alone... All around him, the shadows seemed to take on monstrous shapes and vile laughter bounced on his walls all night.

0002, Nibelheim, September 23rd

When he saw the Makonoids, the knowledge that Sephiroth had been blindly denying all his life started to creep into his tormented mind. Ever since he'd arrived in Nibelheim, his head had been throbbing nonstop, making him act out of character to try to gain relief from his pain. He knew Zack was worried about him, but he truly couldn't focus much on the boy. His mother's name was inscribed on the reactor wall behind him, monsters were growing inside the facilities, and...

"Wait, normal SOLDIERs? What about you then?" Zack asked, his voice suddenly breaking through the chaos in Sephiroth's mind. Him. He's been stronger and faster, more capable, than everyone else since his birth. He can use materia in ways others cannot. He has the Masamune. He'd thought all these gifts that meant he was meant for something bigger, but...

Sephiroth staggered, the sudden realization too much for him. Zack shouted his name, trying to find out what was wrong, but he shoved him off, struggling to breathe, to think. "Am I... the same? Am I a monster?" He whispered, staring at his hands in horror. He'd used these hands to hold Ciara... to touch her. If he were a monster, does that mean he'd done something terrible to her?

Genesis's arrival didn't really matter to him. He blocked the man's weak attack and tuned out most of what he was saying. His head was in agony. Ciara... if he were truly a monster, then when he embraced her, had he done something unforgivable? _'She was wasting away... rotting from the inside out like some foul disease was eating her body.'_ Angeal's words came back to haunt him. Something eating her from the inside out? He'd... inside her. Sephiroth's entire mind fractured and his soul screamed. He'd killed Ciara.

As his torment washed over him, the pressure which had been constantly assaulting his mind for days finally broke through, seeping into his mind. He saw a flash, a vision of a foul face and mind, gloating yellow green eyes, and heard an evil voice whispering to him. _I can give you power, I can take away your pain,_ it said. Sephiroth would die if he had to live with the knowledge that he killed the only woman he loved, the only person he truly cared for. He couldn't. He wasn't a hero, wasn't strong. He was weak and a coward. So Sephiroth let go, and felt that darkness washing over his mind, drowning out the pain until it was nothing, not even a memory. Then Sephiroth opened his eyes and looked at Genesis.

"You will rot." He pronounced, turning and walking out of the reactor, leaving it all behind as he relinquished his body and mind to the darkness which had always been inside him, his shattered soul locked away for all time.

0002, Nibelheim, October 1st

For a moment, Sephiroth saw Ciara, as he fell into the lifestream and carried Jenova there with him. She was surrounded by the most beautiful light, dressed in silver and gold armor. The spear she'd used to spar with him was clasped in her hand. As he fell by her, those beautiful blue eyes he'd never been able to forget about widened and tears rained down her face. She reached for him, mouth forming his name. She even dove after him, leaving her light behind and falling into shadow with him. He reached up his hand for her briefly and their fingers touched, reawakening his tormented soul. "Ciara..." He whispered her name, then allowed his hand to drop. She didn't belong with the monster who had killed her. He allowed the shadows to take him away.

"Sephiroth!" Her anguished cry followed him, making him shed another tear. But Jenova was still inside him, and since his body and mind would not meld into the planet, she saw an opportunity. She rose up again and took control, using his unique abilities to start absorbing information from Gaia and plotting his revenge. Sephiroth started plotting, too. Plotting how to die.

0011, Nibel Mountains

"Though I cannot reject Jenova entirely, I can undermine her. I will do so. This body is still mostly human, after all. I will gloat. I'll taunt. I'll arouse anger and determination inside of those seeking to stop me. And most of all, I will never truly fight them. The strength of Sephiroth will never rise again in this world. No one could stop me if I did, not even Ciara, if she rose to fight me. There is a chance that I will never truly die; Calamity has essentially been born anew in me and even if my body died, I will live on in one form or another as long as her corruption exists in this planet. If a person gathered enough of Jenova's cells, I could take them over and come back. But I'll only do so if Cloud is still alive, so that I may be stopped after I have once again breathed the air that Ciara breathed once more. In the lifestream, we are separated by the darkness into which I fell. She still waits for me. I fear she will forever. Maybe once Chaos rises and destroys us all will I be free. Perhaps if a true Cetra were to use the purest of lifestream to cleanse my taint for this world, we could even be together again..."

"I found her grave. When I did, I wept. I called for her. She is a Cetra, I know she can hear me. She can even appear before me. If she wished she could take on physical form once more and embrace me again. I gained this knowledge from the planet. But she does not. She probably cannot stand to see me, fallen as I am. But even in my destruction, even in this darkness, I still want to ask her the question I never got the chance to. You promised me a yes, Ciara. _My soul, corrupted by vengeance, Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey, In my own salvation, And your eternal slumber_. _Loveless, _Act IV. I don't have much more time left to myself. Jenova will control me again soon as I summon down Meteor to destroy this hellish world. But I know Ciara will stop it. Maybe I will see her then. I don't know. I have left my recollections here for those who seek the truth. I want no sympathy. I allowed this to happen because I lacked strength. All I wish is for Ciara's happiness. Put a flower on her grave for me. I lo -"

Cloud finished and looked up. "It stops there." He whispered. The women in the group were wiping their eyes. Even the guys looked a little sad. Sephiroth had fallen into Jenova's control not because he was power hungry or deluded, but because he was beset by horrible grief and vulnerable. The man they hated had been taken advantage of at a time in his life when all he held dear and loved was taken from him. Even though he asked for no sympathy... Every single person there felt some. He'd suffered, more than any of them knew. That didn't mean he was forgiven for making the wrong choice, but now that they knew, that they understood, they could all recognize why the man always had such sorrow in his eyes.

The fire cracked in the still night. No one knew what to say. This wasn't what they had expected when they'd started reading. None of them had ever thought they'd be feeling sympathy and sorrow for their greatest enemy.

Suddenly a sweet wind started blowing through the valley and the flowers began to glow with the life of the planet. Everyone stood and watched as the glow became brighter until they had to close their eyes. When they opened them again, the luminous flowers were only faintly giving off light, and in the clearing stood a woman with hair of honey gold and eyes of such blue sorrows that to look at her was to want to weep. She was in full silver and gold armor, but as she stepped towards them, the armor faded away until she wore a simple white dress, a blanket the same color wrapped around her shoulder likes a shawl. She approached slowly, bare feet making no sound as she trekked across the flowers.

When she stopped just outside the ring of people, everyone stared at her. They felt no fighting spirit from her, no danger, and yet, being this close to her caused all of them to feel power rubbing against their skin. Cloud frowned a little and rubbed his forehead, then nodded.

"You're Ciara." He pronounced it softly, making the others stare at him, then the girl again. The blonde woman smiled sweetly and nodded, finally stepping into the light of the fire. "Like Aerith, you can return to the living world." Cloud continued. The girl called Ciara just tilted her head at him, then smiled as a tear rolled down her cheek. She reached up and wiped it away before speaking.

"I... made so many mistakes... mistakes that hurt you. And I'm so sorry that I did. My failures have cost each and every one of you dearly. I want to be forgiven but I won't ever be. Thank you, for finishing and stopping what was my duty originally. I wish I could turn back the clock of time and keep you all from the pain you suffered, but I cannot. All I can do is let you know that Sephiroth is free of Jenova now. He won't arise again." She said, turning and starting to walk away.

"Wait!" Tifa shouted, throwing her hand out. The martial artist didn't know why, but something about the Cetra made her want to cry. The Ancient stopped and looked over her shoulder. "If Sephiroth is free from Jenova, then you and he... you're together now, right?" She asked. Ciara was silent a moment, then gave a sad smile.

"I found Genesis in 0007, after he fought Zack. When he saw me, he reached for me, but I could not embrace him. Instead, because he wished for what he used to have, I sent the lifestream through him and chased out Jenova. But doing so put him into a coma and then he was taken by Deepground. I've lost him since then. Angeal I saved when he died by sending his soul to the Paradise of the Cetra. He was able to guide Zack there once his apprentice died, and reach happiness. But Sephiroth was too dark, too corrupted. There was no way for me to separate the two. From his birth, he was partially Jenova's already. As long as he survived, so would she. He cannot be free of her and still live. After he was defeated the second time, when Cloud accepted his past and his memories, he shook free the last remnants of Jenova from his mind. That enabled Aerith and I to unleash the pure lifestream Jenova had blocked up and cleanse the planet. I destroyed all traces of Calamity then, freeing Sephiroth in the process.. by truly killing him. He is with the planet now, as he should be."

None of the people standing around the fire knew what to say. They hadn't ever wished for Sephiroth to have a happy life or death and even now, their hatred of him ran deep, but... Ciara stood tall and alone, underneath a black night sky, and their hearts broke for her. She only wished for one thing and yet, she could not have it.

Yuffie stood up, anger vibrating through her. "But, but what about you? You've suffered so much, and now that Sephiroth is free shouldn't you be as well?" She asked, tears choking her voice. Ciara softened her gaze and smiled fully at the small ninja. It was so beautiful, but the sorrow in the Cetra's eyes made everyone want to cry.

"Thank you, for crying for me. I am Minerva, the consciousness of Gaia. I can never truly fade to join the planet unless I die. But Sephiroth asked me to live for him, when I freed him. I have my memories. One day, when Chaos awakens Omega for the true final journey, I will be free from my destiny at last. And when that happens, Sephiroth and I will finally be together in the lifestream. Until then... for the both of us, I will live." She said, her words impacting all of them with their strength and utter loneliness. She bowed to them. "Thank you for listening, and for taking the time to read the truth. I just wanted someone to know, to understand, that Sephiroth was a good man, once. Continue to live your lives. Gaia's blessing upon you all." She whispered, turning and walking into the night, fading into the darkness until she was gone.

All were silent, then Tifa turned and looked at Cloud with tears in her eyes. "It's... so sad." She whispered. He put an arm around her waist and pulled her in close to his side, looking up at the stars. A single streak of light danced across the sky, a silent tear. Vincent softly recited the last lines of the poem describing her life, the life of the one who had made the biggest sacrifice for the betterment of the entire world. He said it for the one who smiled alone.

_Even if the morrow is barren of promises, Nothing shall forestall my return. To become the dew that quenches the land, To spare the sands, the seas, the skies, I offer thee this silent sacrifice._

-Note: That's the end. It's so sad... I hope you enjoyed my take on this story and thank you for reading the entire thing. I know it's kind of long.


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